His Slave

53. History

"The booklet talked about strange things, like The Day of the Reckoning, and how to manipulate people into getting what you want."

The Day of the Reckoning. Riley had mentioned something like that the day he came over.

"My blood ran cold. I understood what I was reading, but I didn't really understand, so I opened the journal instead. It was a daily account of Kendra's life. She wrote about her new family, and how they were strict but generous and she was grateful for the things they gave her. Things she never would have had in her old life. She wrote about me like I was a burden; an obstacle in her path. I didn't understand. She loved me. She had to," he pauses for a moment, swallowing.

Tears glisten in my eyes. He tells the story in a way that makes me feel almost like I was there. Like I lived it.

"When I stumbled across a particular passage, it broke my heart," he says softly, glancing away.

"What did it say?" I ask.

"She had written that I was so sweet it was pathetic. She called me weak, and naive, and foolish." His voice is stretched so thin, I think it might break.

And suddenly I understand exactly how James grew to be so cold and arrogant, the way he was when I first met him.

He read these words that had been written by a girl he had loved so deeply, it broke him. He decided at that moment that he would never be taken advantage of again. He never wanted to be considered sweet or weak or foolish ever again.

I wasn't there, but I can see it. I can trace the lines of his grief right back to the very moment that changed him. And I understand.

Because I know that I would have done the exact same thing if that happened to me.

"Despite the fact that my heart was shattering into a million pieces, I continued to read. She had also mentioned that I had divulged more sensitive information about my family than she had hoped to attain in order to help their cause. I knew then that she had tricked me into loving her and opening up to her."

My poor James. He really has been through too much. I squeeze his hand, wishing I could fix his pain.

"Kendra caught me then. In my anger, I slammed her against the wall and demanded to know if they had caused the Trinity Estates fire. She was so shocked that she couldn't deny it. She broke down then and told me everything. How she had been an orphaned debtor and the A.E.D.P. had helped her escape, forged papers and sent her to live with her new family. The very people who had founded the A.E.D.P.," he pauses for affect.

His words slam into me. My stomach drops down to my toes. She was a debtor. That's why she cares about their cause so much. She understands everything debtors have been through. Everything I've been through.

Even though she has hurt my James, even though I don't agree with her methods, I understand her devotion to her cause. And my heart aches for her, even if just a little.

"Anyways, Kendra told me about how her new family had put her up to seducing me. She told me that was an old journal entry and that she really had begun to fall in love with me," his words sound so far away, he might as well be in another universe.

"I told her it didn't matter. I told her I hated her and that I hoped someone burned down her house while she was trapped inside. Then I left. The government is aware of the A.E.D.P. because I turned them in. Of course, Kendra's family is careful, and nothing has been linked back to them yet. I should have taken the booklet from her house, but I hadn't thought to amidst my anger and my grief," he adds, rolling his eyes.

So, he has tried to expose them.

"I'm so, so sorry that you ever had to go through that," I whisper to him, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his uninjured cheek.