Desire 2: Caged

15

Everything in this moment feels so right. I started fanning the pages of the bible, hesitant to read because I wasn't too sure if I still believed. A small piece of paper fell out, I opened it up and it read "You're a good one."
I flipped through a few pages and found a highlighted section it was Proverbs 12:2
"A good man obtaineth favour of the Lord: but a man of wicked devices will he condemn."

I sat still. "What does Mitch know?" I thought to myself. I was a little taken aback. Who really is Mitch? Is he some nice guy or his he a wolf in sheep's clothing? All of my monsters came disguised some lovers and others friends. I wasn't sure.

"Should I tell Rayna about this?" I thought. Nah, she will confront him and I don't need that right now. I decided to keep it to myself. I pushed the letters and the bible underneath my pillow and started to continue reading  a book that I started a few weeks ago called "Desire" by an Author named Fatima Carter. The book is great for passing time. The main character kind of reminds me of myself, A woman trying to keep it together to take her life back.

Rayna returned from the shower.

"Hey girl, you okay?" I asked worried, she looked even more down than she did when she left.

"No, she's leaving." she cried.

"Wait, what's wrong? Who's leaving?"

"Papi. She got release forms today."

"Oh, Rayna! I'm so sorry." I said embracing her

"I don't know what to do."

"It's going to be okay. I'm sure you guys will keep in touch."

She looked at me rolling her eyes.
"Cry baby, it doesn't work like that. She's going to be out and won't even think twice about me. I'm in here for the next 20 years, do you really think she's going to wait on me?"

I looked at her, realizing she was right. Life for Papi is going to go on and I didn't say anything but I knew this was it. I knew she wouldn't wait around. I can't blame her and even though she didn't say it, Rayna couldn't either but I'm sure it hurts like hell.

Rayna was emotional for the rest of the evening until she finally fell asleep. I laid in the dark and couldn't help but to think about Mitch. I don't know who he is or what he wants, but I'm going to find out. The scripture constantly replayed in my head. Was I really a good one?

The next day, I was already awake since I couldn't get much sleep. Rayna woke up and started to get dressed and soon after we were called for count. Like clockwork, every single day 3 times a day. We headed to breakfast and Rayna joined. She usually never goes to breakfast, but I understand.

We were sitting and not saying much to each other. We were two broken souls keeping each other from being alone.

"Hey. Deysire."

I looked up to see Ja'Zaye.

"Oh, hey."

"I heard about your kid. If you need anything don't hesitate."

"Thanks. That's really sweet."

"What's up Rayna?

"Hey Ja'Zaye." She replied not giving her eye contact.

"I heard Papi's getting out. That b***h Griffin had her sent to seg so she doesn't get into any trouble."

Rayna got up and ran away from the table.

Ja'Zaye sat next to me.
"Look, I can help you. I see how down you be and you're far too pretty to be sad all the time. Come to my cell anytime you need to. Anything you need, I got you."

She got up and walked away.
Did she just hit on me?