Unrequited

Chapter 58: Need

Prime P.O.V

I slid closer towards her, my eyes never leaving hers. I noted her heart rate increased and she licked her lips as her body tensed. I halted in my advance, placing one hand along the backrest of my seat, the other on my lap. ''Orianna. I cannot afford the luxury of being able to dwell upon what happened between us,'' I felt my right hand ball into a fist as it lay on my lap, my eyes narrowed dangerously. ''Especially now with this recent chain of events. I must be ready and able to lead my Autobots and assist our human allies to deal with this impending threat.''

Beside me Orianna nodded slowly, begrudgingly, before she broke my gaze and looked away. Her body seemed to relax slightly, and I took the opportunity to slide marginally closer to her. I sighed out loud. ''When I have defeated Megatron, I would very much like to finally resolve the issue...''

Orianna snapped her head towards me. ''The ''issue.'' She growled as she shook her head, her voice rising in anger. ''Bloody hell Prime! You make me sound like some problem on your to never ending ''to do list'' to solve!'' Her hand flew to the passenger side door and she began to open the door.

Before she could even utter another word, I snarled in frustration, reached over and grabbed her wrist, wrenching it off the door handle. I locked the door as I pulled her back towards me. ''That is NOT what I meant Orianna!''

''LET ME GO PRIME!'' She roared, as she tried to pull her hand away and break free. I removed my hand only to grab both shoulders and push her up against the cabin door, pinning her there with my body. She gasped out loud, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she glared up at me. Her eyes shone with desire and rage in equal measure.

The same emotions surely burned within my eyes as I felt her body against mine. The heat. The need. It tortured my mind and pushed me towards breaking point. ''NO! I WON'T,'' I snapped back. ''Not this time.'' With great effort, I softened my voice as I shook my head. ''Never again.'' Her eyes widened at my declaration and her furious glare slowly dissipated as she gazed up at me. I exhaled roughly as I closed my eyes in a bid to break the spell this woman had over me.

''You can't keep running away Orianna!'' I shook my head yet again, not only in disbelief at her continued course of action, but to try and clear my rapidly clouding mind. /She is a human woman. You should not desire her, need her.../. But as I looked into her eyes, as I reflected on the past four months bereft of her presence, I found the will to listen to myself crumbling – along with my resolve.

I lowered my voice as my eyes darted rapidly over her face. ''When you run away from your problems Orianna, they only follow you.'' My lips curved into a small grin as I stared into brown and gold flecked eyes that stared back intensely. ''And NO, before you say it, you are not a problem.''

She stilled beneath me and bit her lower lip as she looked away, shaking her head. Orianna closed her eyes tightly and a single tear tracked down her cheek as she fought to stifle a sob. Opening her eyes once more, she stared up at me. I felt my spark clench at the utter misery and pain I saw within them. Several more tears spilled out of red-rimmed eyes and slid down her lightly freckled, flushed cheeks. I slowly moved one hand to her face, cupping it gently and wiping away the tears. Orianna hissed at the touch, her lips brushed against my fingers and her body arched up against me. I stilled my hand and placed it flat against the cabin window as I drew in a ragged breath. /Primus – help me!/. ''Orianna...'' I found it difficult to speak.

Orianna's breaths were shallow and rapid as she forced herself to keep speaking. ''I... I thought I could fix things by giving us some space.'' She exhaled deeply in a bid to calm herself, and I could feel her pulse, her life blood, beating rapidly under the palm of my hand as I held her down. ''I.. I thought it would give me a ch... chance to stop loving you. To try and forget about what happened..''

Tortured brown and gold flecked eyes once more stared into piercing blue ones. I released her shoulder and brought the other hand up to lay on the window on the other side of her head. Though I had granted her freedom, she did not try to move or leave. My eyes once more flicked over her face - searching. Memories of the last four months deprived of her presence or any sort of contact echoed through my mind and I almost physically shook myself to banish the feelings that clawed at me. My voice was a strangled whisper as I leaned closer towards her. ''And it worked.''

Her eyes continued to search mine as she placed two hands on my chest and drew a sharp breath at the contact. ''Worked?'' Her breath was warm against my neck, her voice distracted, as she sent me a questioning look. I watched in fascination as a pink tongue darted out to lick her lips.

My body remained pressed up against hers and I found myself wanting to almost engulf her, surround her and claim her for my own. My mind was buzzing, a white noise, as my spark pulsed swiftly and eagerly, reveling in this proximity to its desire. I leaned closer still. I could smell her hair and I closed my eyes as I recalled grabbing fistfuls of it as I kissed her. 

My eyes flew open as one of Orianna's hands moved lightly up my chest, her fingers gently and almost reverently caressing the skin on my neck. Her eyes were fixated on its ministrations. I thumped one hand hard against the back of the cabin in a bid to stifle a groan of pleasure. ''Giving yourself space!'' I growled out between gritted teeth. I almost flinched as her right hand rested gently against my cheek, her thumb softly brushing against my lips.

''It... it was starting to work...'' Orianna's pupils were dilated and fixed upon my lips.

I should have been relieved to her her say such words, yet all I felt was a stab of pain shoot through me at the implication and I found myself pressing against her harder, my lips grazing her thumb as I spoke. ''Starting?'' my voice rumbled darkly, and she hissed at the sound. ''Is it not - working anymore?'' My head was almost pressed against her forehead, my hands were clenched into fists as I forcibly tried to stop myself from reaching down and pulling her against me. 

Four agonising months of not seeing her, speaking to her and now she was so close. It was too much and yet, not enough... /Never enough. It would seem I could never have enough of this woman/. My snarl of frustration rumbled around the cabin as I became painfully aware I did indeed want this woman. My base physiological needs seemed to be overriding my ability to think logically and rationally.

Orianna flicked those beautiful eyes away from my lips to my face, a small, coy smile spread across her face as her right hand moved to run through my hair and pulled my head towards her. I found myself willingly being drawn towards her. /Like a moth to a flame as the saying goes/. A moment later a warm, teasing voice whispered in my ear, ''How can it when there is no space between us Optimus?'' Her lips grazed my ear as she chuckled softly. I felt a jolt of electricity tear through me, causing me to hiss out loud in shock.

I dipped my head to rest upon her forehead and though I had no need of oxygen, my chest rose and fell in time with hers as I fought to somehow gain control of my erratic emotions and my reactions. ''Orianna... is that what you want? What you need?'' I could not seem to look at her as I spoke for fear she would see right through me. /What? What is it you are afraid of showing her? Of letting her see?/. I closed my eyes tightly as I asked the question I feared an answer to. ''For me to stay away from you indefinitely?'' /Primus Please don't say it... do not make that request/.

I felt her forehead move against mine as she shook her head and a soft, rueful laugh fell from her lips. ''I do not want to be away from you Optimus.'' Her fingers gently ran down the side of my face as her voice dropped to a whisper, laden with sadness and regret. ''I never did.'' At her admission, I felt as if a massive weight was lifted from my shoulders and a smile began to spread across my lips. I opened my eyes and looked into her beautiful face, into eyes that held shadows of sorrow and regret.

And my spark was undone.