Bounded To You (Star-Crossed)

Chapter 1 - Parallel Circumstances

He didn't write as much, but for almost a week, not a day went without him writing. Again, Lucius had died, and he ached, his entire existence ached. The times had changed, no longer the world of kings. Eglar, many years ago, ceased to exist. They had made sure to erase the country from as many minds as they could. Lucius, the Delafontaine's, all gone, lost to the world in hopes of them protecting their secret. Levi not known, magic not known, everything only a fairytale to be told to children nowadays.

Taking in a breath, he looked down at the empty page, closing his eyes as he let out the breath, opening them before he started writing:

June 1878

Love,

My heart breaks when I remember that I have lost you... that smile of yours never to be seen by those dead eyes of mine. That kindness of yours forever lost to this wretched world that is filled with misery and despair. Life has never been more meaningless to me until I've had to experience it without you at my side. I love you. It will be long until your ears hear those words again. They have lost their meaning to me. Now they are nothing more than a painful reminds of what I once had, relished, cherished. Now lost to me for a time I know not when it will end. I do not know how much more this battered and bruised heart of mine could bare before completely shattering. I do not know if it would return to the same one you once knew and loved. I thought my tears have long dried, and yet I find myself shedding them when I least expect them.

Nights are the worst. I hate the quiet that comes with it. Only things that derives from it are the thought that are triggered, and those memories that once were nothing but sweet, treasured, now only tore me apart, threatened what is left of my sanity, burned my eyes with tears that tore their way from my lids, searing their trails across my cheeks. It is safe to say, living without you is torture that now I believe I deserve to live with, since it was I who you died for; I who failed to save you; and have failed you still as I am yet to avenge your death to this day. You would tell me to move on, you have told me to, but it eludes me how I am to do so, when nothing occupies my mind, my heart, but thoughts of you, and love for no one other than you.

I miss the warmth of your body next to mine, the feeling of your fingers as they wrap around my own, and the way they felt running through my hair. I miss hearing you, listening to your precious voice as you spoke. I still recall all your different smiles, ones of mischief, ones of love, ones of sympathy, especially the one when I would catch you gazing at me, you would smile exquisitely, a dip at the corner of your lips as they lift so charmingly, before looking away as if you weren't staring a moment before. Beautiful. That was what always crossed my mind when it happened, which was quite often that now I would give my life for it to happen once more.

I love you. It pains me how much I want to whisper them in your ears, feel you shiver in my embrace as my warm breath caresses you're skin. I don't believe there are words enough to speak and say how much I yearn for you. I find myself wondering sometimes if there is a remedy for this love that plagues my heart, then I realize that even if there was one, I wouldn't take it. You see my love, as much as it is killing me, this lose, it is torture, the worst pain that I've ever felt, this love is also what gave me the most precious, incredible, beautiful, unreplaceable time of my life.

You have given me something that makes others envious of, they would die to have, and some live and die without ever feeling this extraordinary amount of adoration towards anyone. And I did. I do. I adore you; love you; and would die for you. I adore you, my love. I hope you never lose the memories of how dearly I cherished having you in my life, and my love for you. I am yours, always have been, always will be. I keep praying that you come back to me soon, as soon as you can, as it aches, this emptiness that was once filled with your existence, it aches, and I know not what to do to fix it. My only hope is for your return, to hold you close to my heart, and perhaps help it heal some.