Forced Reconciliation

67.

Andi Styles

"I always get a little nervous every time we're here."

Harry squeezes my hand and turns to look at me fully. "I know, A. But it's going to be okay. You know that, I know that, and the baby knows that."

"You're right."

"Just think about how exciting it is every time we get to hear their heartbeat. Think about how much they've grown since two weeks ago." I nod with a small smile. "Think they're the size of an avocado this week."

Harry moves his hand to rest on my bump and I place my hand on top of his. "It's already going by so fast. I feel like I'm not taking it in as much as I should be."

And it's true. I'm already sixteen weeks pregnant, and I feel like I just found out yesterday. Harry and I have been coming in for scans every two weeks, which is a lot more often than normal, but Nancy thought it would be a good idea just because of my past pregnancies. It also eases my mind every couple of weeks when I get to hear their heartbeat and know that together, me and my baby have made it yet another two weeks with no complications.

Harry and I leave for London in two days, and since we'll be gone traveling for almost three weeks doing back to back fashion weeks, this will be the longest we go without an ultrasound to give me that peace of mind.

So now here I sit on the chair next to Harry in the exam room as we wait for Nancy, and I try to push down my nerves that seem to rise every time I'm here. It's like every time we're here, the back of my mind is mentally preparing to hear nothing when she pulls out the ultrasound machine.

I hate that I'll probably never not think that way.

Two knocks on the door sound out before Nancy is making her way in with a smiling face. She's got half of her hair pulled back into a clip and her blue glasses sit on the bridge of her nose as she waltz's in to take a seat.

"My favorite people," she starts out and gives us both hugs. "How are you feeling, Andi?"

"Good, actually. Sometimes I think I'm feeling a little too good."

Nancy smiles and pats the exam table for me to come sit on. "Pregnancy shouldn't always equal misery. You can have an enjoyable time while creating a human, sweetie."

I nod and lay back, knowing our little routine by now since this is the fourth time I've done this in a little over a month. I know she's right. It just always seems odd to me that my two previous pregnancies caused me to be so sick, and there's nothing like that this time around.

"You'll be traveling for the next little while, right?"

"Yeah, until the end of February."

Harry moves to stand next to my head, his hand resting on my shoulder. I roll my oversized t-shirt up and unbutton my jeans before tugging them down a little as well to expose my stomach completely.

Nancy looks to Harry with a serious look as she squeezes some gel on my bump. "Don't let her overwork herself while you're all away, okay?" I go to interject and Nancy holds a finger up before continuing. "I know it's the biggest month of the year for you, but I can't have you stressing yourself out too much and running around more than you should be."

"I'll keep an eye on her," Harry promises.

"And let yourself rest when you need it, okay?" I nod. "You've got the most supportive husband I've ever seen, and I don't doubt that he wouldn't do just about anything for you if you asked him."

I give her a little mock salute and she laughs. "I'll be good, I promise."

"Alright, now let's take a look at your baby." Nancy places the ultrasound wand down on my stomach, moving the gel around to get a clear look at the monitor in front of her. Harry rubs soothing circles into my shoulder and up my neck and squeezes when the sound of a clear and healthy heartbeat sounds through the exam room. "There they are."