The Lives Of The Romanovs

Grief and Loss (Season 3 Finale)

Anastasia

"Cut it." I said to Rebecca. I sat in the chair in front of my vanity with a towel hanging around my neck. Rebecca seemed very hesitant as she held the scissors in her hand.

"Anastasia Nikolaevna...I am not sure about this."

"Please, I am asking you kindly."

"But your hair goes all the way to your hips when it is down. It is wavy and beautiful. I do not think I have the heart to cut your hair."

I scoffed. "Rebecca, remember how I practically begged my mother to let you become one her ladies-in-waiting just so you would not have to move with Father Grigori to Siberia? This is the least you could do for me."

"Well...alright. But I really do not like this." Rebecca sighed. And with one clear noise, I heard the scissors snip. For the next thirty-minutes, Rebecca cut and brushed my hair. She made sure everything was even. And eventually, she was done.

"There...I'm finished. What do you think?" Rebecca mumbled. My hair was officially very short, just like some of the ladies over in France and America have been doing. The hairstyle was called a "Bob". The hairstyle went just below the ears. My bangs were trimmed just a little bit too, just a little bit above the eyebrows.

"I love it! I look so modern, don't I?" I giggled and started touching my new hair.

"The Tsarina is going to kill me." Rebecca cried and shook her head. I took the towel off of myself and helped Rebecca clean up the hair from off the floor.

Rebecca and I walked out of my room and down the halls. The servants that had been walking by were either shocked or smiling at me. Eventually, I made it to the dining hall where Papa and Mama were having their lunch. I walked into the dining hall.

"Papa and Mama, what do you think?" I asked them. Mama looked up at me with sad eyes, as of she had been recently crying. Papa had red and puffy eyes too. "I'm sorry, this was a bad time. I was not thinking clearly-"

"Anastasia, your hair looks amazing. I am so proud of the woman you have become." Papa nodded at me, giving a weak smile. Mama looked up too. Most of the time, she would have scolded me for something like this. But she was just so overcome with grief, that she did not care at this moment. Once Mama recovered from Alexei's death, then I would get a scolding. But we were all sad and didn't know how to exactly grieve our Alyosha's death.

"Papa...I really miss Alexei." I broke into sobs.

"Me too, my Shvybzik. Me too." Mama replied to me before Papa could. "Come, my dear. Sit down."

I walked over to the table and sat down with parents. And together, we simply had a silent lunch.
——————————————————————————
Olga

"Tsarevich. Tsarevich Oleg Igorovich." I whispered to myself as I held my son in my arms. Papa was going to make Oleg the Tsarevich of Russia. I was completely nervous and shaken at the thought. How would I keep my son safe from revolutionaries? How would I prepare Oleg for such a role? If Papa died before Oleg turned eighteen, who would be regent?

"Olga, my darling, you must go get some sleep. Please, take a nap." Igor put his hand on my shoulder while I was sitting in the rocking chair. But I could not get up. For some reason, I just could not set Oleg down.

"I cannot do it. I cannot prepare Oleg for Tsar."

"Yes, you can. Your father and his government officials with help too."

I looked over at Igor with tears in my eyes. "I am scared. Oh Igor, I am so scared."

Igor moved his hand to my face and started to wipe the few tears that were rolling down my face.