Face Me Like An Idiot

39

"Look, Kacchan!"

Small, gentle fingers grasped Katsuki's significantly larger one, the other tiny hand pointing to his front. At the end of his finger, rooted to the dirt, was a dandelion. "It's a dandelion! Mom said that if we make a wish and blow on it, our wish will come true!"

"Don't be stupid, Izuku," Katsuki muttered slowly, the memory of this moment fresh in his mind. Although his words were supposed to be said with enthusiasm, the only expression he could make was sedated.

"I'm telling the truth!" Izuku retorted, his eyebrows furrowing and chubby cheeks puffing. "Watch."

Izuku leaned in closer to the delicate flower, taking a deep breath in… before pursing his lips and exhaling. The thin, white specks on the dandelion immediately travelled in the direction of his blow. They flew away mesmerisingly, Izuku's emerald eyes following in astonishment.

Then… they perished, along with the scenery; along with the young version of Izuku. Wafted and deformed, as like Katsuki's current state of mind.

The safe confines of his dorm room seemed to be darkening with each passing minute, soon being engulfed in darkness. Katsuki stood in the middle of it all, one of his trembling hands outstretched, grabbing a hold of cold, brittle air. He liked to imagine that he was holding on to Izuku's hand, and the two of them were enjoying each other's comforting presence.

…But that… that wasn't possible anymore, was it?

It had been a week now, since Izuku had gone 'Missing In Action'. Every phone call was met with a dull voice saying that his number couldn't be reached, and each night Katsuki went out to search, he would return to the dorms empty-handed. It soon became frustrating.

And the night he went missing… just happened to be the day of their breakup. Katsuki couldn't help but jump to the worst conclusions. What if the League kidnapped him? They were enemies, weren't they? What… what if Izuku was already dead, and the Heroes had just been sitting ducks?

Paying attention during lessons was a feat by itself. He was too restless to sleep at night, thinking of every possible situation. It wasn't just him, either—nowadays, his classmates would bear solemn and contemplative faces. No more were the enthusiastic and participative responses the teachers would get. It would seem that Izuku's disappearance had put the entire class on edge.

Todoroki, especially, looked quite worn-out. Not as bad as Katsuki, but still worse than average. It was to be expected—wasn't he part of Izuku's Yakuza? He showed up at the Camino Incident and had strange devices, not to mention a peculiar sense in fashion.

Remembering that particular situation, Katsuki discreetly looked at Yaoyorozu, Iida and Kirishima. They also looked a little more tired than the rest of the class, but clearly for another reason than Izuku's disappearance. They oh-so subtly spared glances to each other and to Todoroki, which the latter likely hadn't noticed due to his fatigue.

Katsuki was tempted to inquire Todoroki about Izuku's disappearance, but it was probable that he wouldn't give him the answer he sought. This situation was getting on his last nerves. All Katsuki desired was to hold Izuku in his arms once more…

It didn't matter that he was a Villain, or that he killed people, Katsuki longed for his affection. The past week had been torture for him; each night he spent without Izuku, resulted in a morning with dried tears on his cheeks and irritated, puffy eyes. Never in his life had Katsuki felt so… deprived of something.

"Young Bakugou?" A small voice murmured from behind his door. Katsuki weakly turned his gaze towards it, his expression unchanging.

"What?" He ensured that his voice hid his true emotions, holding his usual confidence—don't deny it, it's arrogance—instead of the guilt that sank his heart and the swallowing depravity that plundered his soul.