What the Heart Wants (Sirius Black Love Story)

Chapter 28

Gideon was more than true to his word. Sadie suddenly found it nearly impossible to so much as walk between classes without his company, and he even refused to go to bed until he had seen her disappear safely up to her own dormitory. They'd had quite the heated argument over whether she would be sleeping with him from then on or not, but he had ultimately given in when she had assured him that she and the other girls in her dorm would be a force to be reckoned with on the miniscule chance that anyone tried to attack them in their beds. He still seemed reluctant to let her out of his sight, and he was always waiting for her in the common room when she came down first thing in the morning.

At first, his newfound concern had felt incredibly sweet and romantic, and it was certainly a nice change from his earlier behavior. However, after several days of this, Sadie was growing more than a little bit annoyed. His protectiveness was bordering on controlling; he would scold her any time that she tried to go anywhere without him, and he seemed particularly intent on keeping her from ever being too close to Sirius. Sadie imagined this had to do with the position he had found them in the morning after she'd been attacked. The problem was, she didn't feel that she could really get angry at him for this because the fact was that she did have feelings for Sirius. She was trying to forget about him, truly, but that was much easier said than done. She felt so guilty about it sometimes that it made her nauseous. The only reason she was alive was because Caroline Prewett had wanted her to continue to make her son happy.

And then there was the added fact that Gideon still didn't know the full circumstances under which his mother had been killed. Sadie knew she was being cowardly, but she still felt guilty enough as it was about Caroline's death without Gideon also blaming her for it.

By the time her birthday rolled around, Sadie felt as though she was once again on the perpetual verge of an emotional breakdown. She missed Sirius and her other friends, was about at her wits end with Gideon, didn't feel as though she could break up with him, and still had regular flashbacks to Christmas Eve night. Add to that the stress of her upcoming O.W.L.s and the trapped feeling from Gideon's controlling behavior, and, well, Sadie was not much herself at all.

On the morning of her birthday, she was startled awake by the sound of her dormmates shouting "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, SADIE!" She squealed and tried to sit up quickly, got tangled up in her sheets, and tumbled out of bed, landing on the floor with a loud thump. Her friends laughed loudly and pounced on her, whacking her repeatedly with pillows. Sadie shrieked and struggled to disentangle herself from her bedding, but it felt like an age before she was finally able to scramble away from the other girls and grab her own pillow to join in the fight.

Only when they were all completely exhausted and breathless from both laughter and exertion did they finally collapse in a heap on Sadie's bed, still struggling to contain their giggles. They finally managed to calm down after a couple of minutes until Marlene grinned.

"It's a good thing the boys can't get up here. Can you imagine the looks on their faces if they had walked in on us all having a pillow-fight half-naked? I'll bet James would die and go to Heaven right then and there." And the giggles erupted once more, especially as Lily tried and failed to look completely disgusted at the thought.

"Well, according to Sirius," Sadie began slyly. "It would only be returning the favor. Apparently, there was an incident right before break involving Lily, a visit to the boys' dorm, and my brother in a bath towel?"

Lily looked as though she could have fried an egg on her face as the other girls gaped at her with open mouths. "How have you not told us about this?!" Mary yelled.

"Must have slipped my mind," Lily sniffed. "It's not like it was anything to get excited over."

Sadie smirked knowingly but didn't say anything. Sirius had said that Lily hadn't been able to look away from James. He could have been exaggerating, but Sadie had her own suspicions that her friend felt more than disdain for her brother. She was, however, happy to let things run their course. She was sure they'd get there eventually.