Find my Seaweed Brain...

April 30th

(A/N. I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while, I've had mock exams and then Christmas and then results so it's all been a bit busy so enjoy this slightly-longer-than-normal chapter as an apology ❤️)

I'm stood by the doorbell outside Sally's apartment, willing myself to ring it. I've been putting off this visit, the one where I know I need to tell Sally.

I've read everything I possibly can about pregnancy. I know I'm 20 weeks along, that's half way there. I know that right now the cluster of cells is the size of a banana. I know that I'm likely to feel more energised than I was a month ago and that I'm also more likely to lose my breath, which I've proved by taking the stairs rather than the elevator. I know that my bump is around 4cm smaller than it should be and I know I should be concerned. I know that the cluster of cells should be kicking any day soon.

I know that with every week that passes it's getting harder to think of it as a cluster of cells.

I raise my hand to knock but falter: Sally has a lot to deal with right now. Her son is missing for Hades sake. Maybe it's not the best idea for me to tell her I'm pregnant with her grandbaby, who might not even make it if I try to save her son.

Before I manage to bring myself to knock, Paul opens the door.

"I'll be back with-" he starts before nearly bumping into me. After he stumbles backwards he lets out a chuckle.

"Wow Annabeth, didn't except to see you right outside the door! Sally's in the living room." He says gently.

I'm grateful for Paul. At first it was because I know that he means a lot to Percy; especially after Gabe. But since Percy has been gone and I've grown close to Sally, Paul has just been so sensitive and attentive to Sally and to me. Strange how my boyfriends stepdad acts more fatherly than my own father oftentimes.

"Thanks Paul..." I say smiling before I walk past him into the apartment.

"Annabeth!" Sally exclaims when she sees me. Even this is enough to almost make me cry. Damn hormones. "How've you been lovely? It's been a while."

She grins at me with that ageless, genuine smile Percy always used to talk about. How jealous I was of Percys perfect parent back when we were 12. Silly really. Sally has become my perfect parent too.

When she sees the worn out look on my face her smile drops into a frown, and the kind aura she carries with her drops too, the worry wrinkles and eye bags becoming more evident as they are on me.

"Have you been eating?" She says immediately, which irritates me a little bit. I curse the hormones.

I manage a nod without bursting into tears, but I know I'm not fooling anyone.

"There's a new prophecy..." I start, and the colour fades from her face.

"Percy?" She asks weakly, "again?"

I shake my head, "not exactly..."

Her face fills with dread, more so than even before, "you?" She asks, almost shaking.

I guess I'd never really considered that I might have become just as important to Sally as she is to me. Her son is gone and I'm here in the void, someone who gets it. I immediately regret coming here to tell her.

I feel like I'm drowning, gasping for breath as I fight the urge to cry. Trying to swallow that lump that forms at the bottom of my throat, that I know is only gonna disappear through calming down or crying.

"Poseidon's son shall seal his fate,
Through actions of a careless date,
The coral owl finds out alone,
She holds the key unto his throne,
The key to his death or to his life,
The key to courage and the key to strife."

Her breathing slows at death. I expect her to berate me, to beg me to save him, to hate me, and I don't even know why. I know deep down that Sally would never do any of that but I guess I've come to associate her as a mother figure. The only other women I've ever had as "mothers" were my step mum and Athena, which doesn't create a picture perfect idea of mums.

Instead of berating me or begging me or hating me, she walks up to me and wraps her arms around me. And Styx if the Jackson's don't know how to make me cry.

"Percy loves you Annabeth, he won't die and leave you alone." She says, rubbing my back gently.

I swallow the lump at the back of my throat.

"Oh I know, he's made sure of that." I mumble to myself. Sally looks up a little thrown off after hearing my statement, and I curse myself for not keeping my thoughts to myself.

"I mean I must be the coral owl, his fate is on my shoulders. If he dies it is utterly and undeniably my fault." I say after a second, somehow admitting that the person who means the most to me in the entire world might die because of me easier to admit than the truth. I guess that's my hubris though isn't it.

"No one would ever blame it on you Annabeth." She says sternly with her hands on my shoulders, although I know she's wrong. I can think of quite a few people more than happy to blame me.

"I would."

We stood there in silence for a long while. It shouldn't be a surprise to anyone, it's easy for people to blame themselves for prophecy's, Percy blamed himself for Luke. A demigods life has been a predestined Greek tragedy since long before us.

After a long while of standing, Sally broke the silence although I didn't hear her at first. "Annabeth you look a little pale do you need to sit down? I have some cookies I can reheat for you." She said, already fumbling around with the fridge.

After she mentioned it I did feel a little bit sick. I contemplated leaving before it became more noticeable but I could never leave after Sally offered me blue cookies. Whether it's because of Percy's influence or Sally's motherly smile, there is something inescapably homely about the Jackson house. It's almost like Aphrodite herself has charm spoken me into staying for those cookies I didn't even particularly want. But before I knew it they were out of the oven and I'd eaten the entire plate.

Sally smiled at me as I sucked the crumbs off each finger on my hand, and then rested her hand on my knee. I looked up, ripping myself away from the moment of calm bliss I've created surrounding blue food in Percys apartment.

"Glass half full? You hold the key to his life Annabeth. We don't know what it is, but it also means he might not die. I for one know that a chance is all you two need to thrive. What is the life of a demigod besides a course of miraculous chances?"

Chance. I guess she's right. Everything about our lives have been accidents. An accident that we were born. An accident that Percy was the first child of the big three to reach 16. It could have been Thalia if my kidnapping hadn't led to her joining the hunters. An accident that my dagger had been the only dagger that could kill Luke. An accident that I had the "Key" to save Percy.

Chance. Accident. Mistake. What's the difference?

But of course I didn't share any of these concerns with Sally. Instead I said "Kind of you to call me a miracle Sally." With what can only be described as a sad attempt at a smile.

Fortunately, my self pity was cut off before Sally could ask any questions about the clear deterioration of my mental health.

Unfortunately, it was cut off by Paul Blofis entering the apartment with a bag of takeaway Indian food. As soon as I could thank the Gods for the interruption I was cursing them for timing, because of course my first aversion to food happened to coincide with that very moment and I was bent over the toilet puking up every last blue cookie I'd devoured moments before. Among other things.

I flushed the toilet and turned around, only to jump so high I almost hit the ceiling at Sally stood directly over me. Once I recovered from my initial shock I noticed the shade of her face, as if she'd seen some Ancient Greek spirit behind me. She wasn't making eye contact with me however, she was still staring into the toilet as the vomit was flushed away.

"Annabeth..." she began, and then I realised what she had caused the change in her demeanour.

Before she had a chance to finish the statement I replied.

"I can't do this-" and I was out of the door before she had a chance to yell wait.