Find my Seaweed Brain...

March 12th

It's been almost a month since my encounter with Will and no one has tried to talk to me. Not even Piper. I no longer need to avoid Chiron since he seems to be doing the same to me. When I asked for space this isn't what I'd meant. I'd always been alone really, before Percy came into my life. But alone and never really felt this.... lonely... before.

The vomiting hasn't stopped and Piper wasn't reminding me to eat anymore. I have a constant headache but no ambrosia will help it. Will is the only person I still talk to regularly besides regular camp courtesies, and he won't give me any more nectar and he can't tell me why.

Not only that but the exhaustion of not sleeping has caught up to me worse than anything I've felt before. I train every day without fail and yet I can be winded by the walk across the camp. That isn't stopped me though, which has led to my ankles becoming sore. But it's all ok. It's all for Percy.

Leo says the Argo II will be ready by the end of May, just over two months. Whenever I think about that it brings me to an ugly fact: it's been three months since I last saw Percy. Three months and I've heard nothing, I'm clinging onto the desperate hope that he's at Camp Jupiter because it not... well if not then that's it. That's all I have left in me.

"Wisdoms child walks alone".
Alone. I walk alone. And without Percy there to support me I'm sure it won't be so much of a walk to the mark of Athena as it will be a stumble through the dark in Rome.

Every now and then Leo and Wills advise rolls through my head; "You're not alone in this"; "Not everyone is your responsibility"; "You're allowed to take breaks too"; "We all love you you know.". I can't wait for Percy to come back because not talking to my friends is killing me. Without Percy there to keep me calm everything these days either enrages me or gives me an almost irresistible urge to sob. Today they didn't have bagels in the dining pavilion and I almost threw an axe into one of the pillars.

On the plus side, my lack of emotional grounding has lead to one positive: the Ares kids stay away from me now. Since I scared that idiot into literally tripping onto his own sword, half of the Ares cabin seems to be amused by me and the other half glare at me. Clarrise varies between hatred, humour and again the sad sympathetic gaze all the older camp mates give me.

"Annabeth."

A gentle voice breaks me from my thought and I swivel around knife in hand and a robotic sneer on my face. Once I see who it is I immediately drop my reflexes, but somehow standing next to him leaves me even more tense than before.

"Can I speak to you?" Chiron stands before me. After avoiding me for a month I don't know why he's chosen to speak to me now. Perhaps he finally agrees that holding information from me is useless and dangerous. Holding intellect from me has never proved to be a good idea.

I nod vacantly and begin to follow him as he trots away. Walking up to the steps of the big house all my selfish worries dissipate; meeting alone with Chiron? Maybe they'd found Percy. Maybe this stupid quest is unnecessary.

Maybe they found my seaweed brain.

By the time I sit down I'm almost shaking with suspension.

"Calm down child," Chirons voice breaks my daydreaming, and grounds me back into reality cruelly.

"Is it Percy? Have you found him?" I say hopefully, desperately, but am greeted by a forlorn expression. Slowly he begins to shake his head, and I can tell by the aura radiating from the room that he's doing everything he can to keep me from breaking.

I am so so close to breaking.

"No, I haven't called you in here to discuss Percy but it leads me into what I want to say very well..." he says it gently but the words sting like salt in a stab wound.