Stalker!

I Can't Think!

Andy's POV:

Get it together, Andy.
You can do this.
You probably need a psychiatrist.
"No you don't. Your fine."
That's not what you said yesterday.
"Well..."
Well what?

"Hey, how about we go and talk to Ashley."
Okay? I think and walk over to Ashley, who is sitting on the couch.
I sit next to him and Ashley turns to me.
"Hey." I say.
"Hi." He says groggily.

"What's wrong?" I ask.
"I'm just tired." He replies.
"You should kiss him." My mind thinks.
Before I can stop my lips are already on his.

I jump up and push him away.
"I'm sorry! I just need to... go, no, flow, row, no, no, no! What. I Can't Think!" I say and run out the door.
I run as fast as I can until I'm behind a random bus.
I grip my hair with both hands and yank down. I just wanted to disappear.
I look down at my hands and see that I'm clutching a hunk of my own hair.

I shake it off my hands and rub by hands on my pants repetitively.
Wait where am I?
I shut my eyes tightly and think.
Tour. Tour, that's right.
Ah! Why am I so stupid! Why? Why? Why?!!

What if Haily is looking at me from the bus!
She's watching me. I know it. She's probably thinking I'm a horrible mess.
You know what. I'm going to the psychiatrist.
"I told you your fine!"
Your not even me. You are not my own thoughts.

I walk down the street and pull out my phone.
I look up the nearest doctor and follow the map to the office.
My mind tells me to stop the whole way.
I stop in front of the office and open the door.

I walk up to the receptionist and sign in.
She leads me to a door and tells me the psychiatrist will be out in a second.
I wait 5 minutes before he opens it. The office smells like sugar for some reason.
"Hi, what's your name?" He asks.
"I'm Andy Biersack." I say and look down.

"I'm Doctor Roth. Please sit." He says and motions to the chair in front of me.
The doctor sits and I stare intently at the chair.
I smile and run to the chair.
I sit in the chair backward and spin around in it.

The doctor is taken aback at my actions and I laugh like a maniac.
I scratch my head letting my hair fall in my face and I smile.
I smile wider than before and adjust my seating position until I'm sitting correctly.
I pull my chair unreasonably close to him and he moves himself back.

"What are your emotions right now, Mr. Biersack?" The doctor asks.
"Nothing." I say and smile.
"Explain to me what has happened to you in the past 3 days." He commands.
"My girlfriend dumped me because I was to "obsessive". I burned all of her pictures and hair I cut from her head.
I threw a lamp at my best friend. I don't even know why! My girlfriend told me that we would get back together if I get better. I kissed a guy. The voices in my head have become more aggressive. They've always been there but this is the worse they've ever been. And that's it." I shrug. Through out my story he scribbled down words in his notebook.

"Sounds like an eventful 3 days. Tell me what you felt like when your girlfriend broke up with you." Roth says.
I felt betrayed, sad, and bleak." I say and furrow my eyebrows.
"How about when you kissed the man." He says.
"Out of control." I say.
He nods and writes something in the notebook.

"Have you experienced disorientation or anxiety?" Roth asks.
"Yeah. Sometimes I forget where I am or what my name is. And I constantly feel like my ex-girlfriend, Haily, is watching me and judging my every single movement." I say.
"Is your speech normal? Have you experienced nonsense word repetition?"
"I forgot how to speak this morning. My mind went numb and I ended up saying a bunch of words that rhymed with go." I sigh.

"Do believe these thoughts your having are your own?" He asks.
"They're obviously my own but at the same time they aren't. The voices only want to see my self destruction." I look him directly in the eyes.

"I'm diagnosing you with schizophrenia. I suggest that you research and find out more about it. Schizophrenia is a long-term mental disorder that makes you perceive reality abnormally. Your prescription is for Ziprasidone which is Geodon. I want you to take two pills two times a day with food. Start with two tonight. Okay?" Roth says.

"Alright." I say and grab the paper with my prescription on it.
"What pharmacy do you want me to call it in at?" He asks.
"The closest one. I don't have a car to drive. I'm on tour with my band." I say and roll my neck out.

"Okay. Your prescription is going to be at the CVS down the street. What's your next stop I can give the nearest psychiatrist your file." He says.
"I have a file?" I say.
"You do now." The doctor says.
"Our next stop is in Pomona." I say and get up from my chair.
"I'll send your file to Doctor Harrison. She's at the Pomona Psychiatrist Office." He says and leads me out of his office.

He walks off and I pay the lady at the front desk.
Then, I walk down the street and find the CVS/pharmacy.
I walk in and head toward the huge sign that says Pharmacy.
I hand the man my prescription paper and wait forever for him to come out of the back with it. He hands me a orange bottle full of pills.

I walk into the Jack-In-The-Box across the street and pick up a burger to eat with my pills. Then, I head back to Warped with my pill bottle rattling in my hands.
I shove it in my pocket and open our bus's door.
No one is up. I check the clock and it says 10:55. I didn't realize it was that late.
I get a bottle of water out of the fridge and sit down. I look out the window and peer into the darkness of the night.

I grab my pill bottle out of my pocket and shake two capsules out. And leave it on the table.
These are my little blue and white pills. I sigh and pop them in my mouth.
I eat my burger in silence and fall asleep where I am.
I don't even realize that I left my pills out in the open for everyone to see.

_________________________________________________
Hi!
It took a lot of research to make this chapter. I didn't want to get anything wrong.
And if I did, I'm sorry.
I'm only human!
Anyway, thanks for reading!
- A. F. Grace