Trust Is A Difficult Thing

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Feeling her eyes glued to the floor, Hikari poured out her heart to the soldier next to her, knowing it was utterly foolish to do so. He probably didn't care about these kinds of things but whether she hated it or not, he needed to know about the past for the sake of destroying the liberation.

He needed to know why she freaked out back there, why she was terrified of her real name being uttered by Re-Destro and why she was so incredibly fragile right now.

So, she spoke about things forbidden until now, things she had forced herself to not linger on for the sake of her own sanity. "They found me and dragged me back, promised me that I could be stronger with their help. I was so desprete back then that I listened, I let them torture me and piece me back together for years in order to harden my weak ass heart."

Then the girl shakily pointed a finger towards her back, turning ever so slightly so her brother could see the ugly lines there. "You asked about the scars, didn't you? Well, that was his specialty, a reminder for each lost battle, each time I almost died."

And the reality seemed to hit Hawks immediately, his eyes glued to the terrible sight before sucking in a breath of terror. All his worst fears seemed to resurface all at once, picturing his little sister tortured for years without him knowing.

She must have been so scared, so terrified to go through something like that, to feel like she had to go through something like that.

His voice echoed with nothing but a whisper, cracking on every word as he spoke with horror. "Oh my god, Hikari...but there are so many...does that mean..."

Yet Hikari only cut him off, purposely turning back to rest against the sofa in an attempt to cover the unsightly scars with a bitter scoff. "Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to."

Knowing that basically confirmed his fears, Hawks felt his eyes start to brim with tears. So many lost battles, so many near death experiences, so many times he failed her. The scars were the physical reminder, weren't they?

She sensed his silence before continuing, knowing she would break down soon and wanting to avoid that. "One day, I was put back on missions, just like what we used to do for dad. I was the distraction, the diversion for them while they finished what they needed to do. Every single time, for years.."

Just then her voice stopped as thousands of unwanted memories and touches seemed to crash into her, Hikari's voice echoing with nothing but a whimper as she closed herself even tighter with her arms. "And for years...I..I.."

Realizing she was falling apart at the seams, Hawks immediately snapped out of whatever self loathing he had found himself in before scotting closer to his sister in concern. "Shhh, it's okay. Take your time. I'm right here.."

She felt her hands ball into fists at the very idea, forcing herself to try and speak again but finding it impossible. This was ridiculous, after all these years it seemed like she was just as pathetic and scared as always. Sure, she could try to pretend but Hikari knew better.

She knew she was still broken from the past.

Visions of unwanted touch and harsh whispers then began to creep into her mind as Hikari buried her head in her knees, scared to see her brother's reaction to her next words.

And then broken and small, she finally gained the courage to speak.. " I-I...I was forced to let anyone do as they pleased, let them fuck me and touch me and hurt me in order to distract them from whatever villainous thing the gang had planned. I was thrown away time and time again for a goddamn job, and I just let it happen, because I had nowhere to go. He made sure of that."

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