Again (A Jordan Knight Fanfiction)

32

Amy's pacing the room when Morgan walks in.

"Was this the reason you wanted to come to New York? To see him? How long has this been going on Morgan? You aren't this person, you don't cheat. You know how bad it hurts to be cheated on. Why would you do this to Jesse? He's a good man and he loves you so much. What's wrong with you?"

Morgan's sitting on the edge of her bed crying when Amy turns to her. Amy feels bad for yelling at her. But she wants to get to the bottom of this. She wants to try and understand what's going on.

Morgan wipes her face and tries to stop crying. "Amy I love him. I've always loved him. I never let myself believe he would ever be a possibility again. Then after your wedding weekend he stuck around and we talked. He explained why he did what he did and somehow I forgave him. We wanted to try and be friends after that. But the day he was leaving to go home we slept together. It was supposed to be a goodbye. And it was, for the most part. I got engaged and started planning my wedding to Jesse. Then Jordan showed up at my door one day. Jesse was out of town, Jordan was looking for his mom, but she was also out of town. It was like kismet, like we were supposed to come together that weekend. He stayed with me all weekend. It was amazing."

Amy's confused, "But why would you do that?"

"Because it felt right. Because I wanted to. I've always been more concerned about how things I do make other people feel. For the first time I was putting how I felt first. And he made me feel good. He made me feel things I've never felt before Amy. But even after that weekend I didn't want to leave Jesse. I was being selfish, having my cake and eating it too. Then the opportunity came up to come to New York. I'd planned on coming alone but Jesse wouldn't have it. So I invited you"

"So you used me so you could sneak around and fuck Jordan? Gee thanks Morgan." Amy looks hurt and that upsets Morgan.

"No. Not at all. I wanted you with me to look at wedding dresses. To be completely honest I wanted to spend my days with you and my nights with him. Amy I don't know what's gotten into me and I don't know what to do now. I had just told Jordan I was leaving Jesse five minutes before you stormed into his room. I was so sure about it too. Then I saw how disappointed you were when you saw me with Jordan and I got so confused. I don't want anyone hurt or upset. But I need to know I have you and your support no matter what I decide."

"I don't know Morgan. I'm not sure I could support you leaving Jesse for Jordan. It seems so wreckless. Jesse is too good of a man to just let him go without giving him the chance to fight for you."

Morgan can't imagine her best friend not having her back. She's had Amy's support her whole life. How would she make it through this without Amy's support? She thinks about what Amy's said. "Amy it's not something Jesse can fight for. He's done nothing wrong. He's practically perfect. The only thing he's lacking, he can never be. He's not Jordan. Today when you told me to picture myself in that dress, standing next to Jesse while we get married, I couldn't see it. I could only see Jordan."

Amy sits next to her on the bed. She takes Morgan's hand. "Really? You can't even picture yourself marrying Jesse now? So are you going to break up with Jesse when we get home?"

"I don't know now Amy. I was so sure an hour ago. But now I'm not  feeling so confident. I love them both. I don't want to lose either one of them. But I don't want to hurt either of them either. I just can't stand the thought of never seeing either of them again. I'm so confused. Amy what do you think I should do? Put aside your hate for Jordan and just think of him as my "Donnie". What would you tell me to do?"

Amy thinks about it. "Can I call Donnie? I really think he'd have a better answer for you. Because I'm leaning towards you staying with Jesse. Marrying him and having his beautiful blue eyed babies. And you dumping asshole, I mean Jordan, on his ass."

Morgan begins to cry. She cries until it's almost time for them to check out and go home. She can't seem to stop. "I've got to go tell Jordan goodbye Amy. I'll be right back." Amy watches her and feels terrible. She knows how badly Morgan must be feeling.

When Morgan gets to his room he's gone. Housekeeping is already stripping the bed they'd just made love in. She can still smell him, his intoxicating scent is everywhere. But he's not there. Morgan's heart sinks. She'd wanted to see him just once more before she goes home to make the hardest decision of her life.

She's not crying anymore when she gets back to their room. She's got a big decision to make and crying isn't going to help her.

"So what are you going to do?"

Morgan shakes her head and smiles. "I don't know Aims. I'm going to put on my big girl panties and make a decision. I'm going to do nothing but think about this until I know what to do."

Amy agrees with her. "Good idea. Plus Dorchester Days is next weekend. You don't want to make any decisions that could ruin that."

Morgan laughs hysterically at her best friend. "Yeah we wouldn't want my personal happiness to ruin Dorchester Days."