So Many Birthdays

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In the Crystal Temple, Steven, Ezra, and the Gems were walking through the piles of random junk in Amethyst's room, in search of an object that caused a foul odor throughout the temple.

"How can you live like this?" Pearl asked Amethyst.

"It was fine 'til you guys started whining." Amethyst replied.

"Whining?! The whole temple reeks!" Pearl complained as she covered her nose.

Steven probed some garbage with a stick and retrieved something wrapped in tinfoil.

"I found it!" Steven announced.

"What matter of magical alloy is this?" Pearl asked as she pinched her nose.

Steven unwrapped the tinfoil and a puff of green gas plumed out.

"Ugh!" Ezra gagged.

"It's a burrito." Garnet replied.

"It's the Tuna Burrito from Aqua-Mexican!" Amethyst explained as she took the visibly rotten burrito.

"That place closed like five years ago!" Steven said.

Amethyst took a bite of the burrito, that made Steven flinch in disgust and Pearl looked on in horror.

"You take disgusting to a whole new level, girl." Ezra said as he covered his nose.

"Huh, what's this?" Steven asked as he spotted a painting of the Gems and Rose Quartz on it. "It kinda looks like you guys and my mom."

"Oh Steven, that is us." Pearl replied, excitedly.

"Really?" Steven asked.

"The hard part was getting the shark to pose." Garnet said.

"Why is everyone dressed like old timey people?" Steven asked.

"Maybe it was from that time period." Ezra suggested.

"They are old timey people." Pearl replied as she placed the painting on top of a junk pile.

"Wait... But that would mean... how OLD are you guys?" Steven asked.

"Much older than any human." Pearl replied.

"So, you're immortal or a million years older?" Ezra asked.

"No, no. We don't age." Pearl explained, which made Steven smile. "But we can still get hurt and die."

Steven's smile quickly turned into a big frown while Ezra widened his eyes in surprise. Amethyst then started moaning in pain, visibly sickened, and keeled onto the ground.

"...But not from food poisoning." Pearl said.

"I just can't believe you guys are like a bazillion years old!" Steven said. "How do you find a cake big enough for all those candles?"

"We don't really celebrate birthdays." Garnet replied after she briefly looked at Pearl.

"You don't?" Ezra repeated.

"Why not?!" Steven asked after he gasped loudly.

"It's not our way." Garnet shrugged.

"Well I can't just ignore this travesty of unjustice." Steven said. "I pledge that you will have your birthdays, with all the candy, cake, and ice cream you've been denied."

Elsewhere, Ezra heard Amethyst threw up far away from them with a disgusted face.

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Outside the Crystal Temple, several birthday decorations were set up: a picnic mat with food items, a birthday cake with lots of candles, balloons, and a large 'birthday throne'. Amethyst sat on the throne wearing a cape, while Ezra, Pearl, and Garnet sat on folding chairs. Lion was seen playing in the background.

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