Sometimes I'm wondering whether or not I should feel more. I think I'm dull. I don't really feel shit. At least not anymore.
I mean- I know what emotions I should have at that time being.. but sometimes I can't tell if I'm pretending or not.
Oh yeah, I think I had an actual moment. We cried, a lot. But it took a bit of weight off of my chest. I really don't know if I feel shit or I just pretend to feel shit.
It's confusing.
I feel tired, but energetic. Blue, but pretty happy. Emotional, but oh so numb.
I guess that's why I'm called bipolar xd...
Honestly I don't know why I started writing right now. I kinda just felt like it.
Before, I thought everyone felt like this, that everyone thinks about death sometimes. But the doctors looked pretty worried when I said this.. maybe not? I HAVE NO IDEA.
I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT ANYTHING.
I'm tired.
Why do I have to take pills..
Every time I do, my stomach kinda just shrinks and I feel like vomiting and I remember that Wednesday.. I hate it.
9/02/2021
YOU ARE READING
Random Thoughts
RandomIt's a story of a person dealing with depression which is slowly eating her alive. These stories document the harder parts of her life. Yeah nah.. it's just my journal
