Unexpected Promises

Chapter 64

(Your wife and in-laws can go to hell!) 

"But mama-" 

"I. Said. Go. To. Your. Room." Mama gritted out, glaring at her. A dejected sigh escaped my lips as I stared at her. Why was she taking my anger out on her? 

Frowning, Alayna folded her arms and shook her head stubbornly. "No. I'm not going anywhere." 

"Zara, take Alayna to her room." Turning to face bhabi, mama ordered sternly, coldly, as if stopping herself from lashing out. 

"J- Jee mama." Bhabi quickly replied before scrambling towards Alayna anxiously. 

(O- okay mom.) 

"But bhabi-" Her frown deepened as she tried to interrupt angrily, but when she caught my gaze, she stopped midway. Motioning for her to head in, I closed my eyes with a nod, silently telling her that it's okay. Huffing, she finally headed inside with bhabi. 

"Whether you accept them now or not, the truth won't change. She will remain my wife and they will remain my in-laws, In Sha Allah." Once I was sure that she was out of ear shots, I whispered while looking up at her, my eyes tearing up on their own as I desperately tried to blink them away. 

"Do you have any idea that because of that little stunt of yours, what those ladies might be thinking about me? Or about my family? Or how am I even going to face them after this? No! You have no idea nor do you care about it because I will be the one facing them, not you!" Before I could comprehend it, she was holding my collar while gritting out, her hazel orbs filled with rage. She was hot tempered and I had gotten my anger issues from her, there was no doubt about that. 

"Yes, I don't care mama! I don't care!" Holding her hand, I pushed them away gently while stepping back. Running my hand through my hair in frustration, I added angrily. "At this point, I don't care anymore! Do you think people don't talk behind our backs already? People do! No matter what we do or how we do it, no matter how many times we try to explain something to some people, they will still do whatever they want to do! They will spread rumours and talk behind our backs! It's not our fault that some things happen differently, some things are bound to happen that way because Allah Subhanahu Wa Taàla has written for it to happen like that! I- I don't know how to explain this to you but those who talk in front of us about someone else behind their backs, why do you think they might not talk about us to others behind our backs? Those who are genuinely there for us, wouldn't do this! They won't spread rumors! Please don't think that if this wouldn't have happened then things might have been different! This has already happened and it was bound to happen that way. We can't change the qadr of Allah! We can't change the qadr of Allah!" I repeated the last line, my energy draining by the end. 

The fact that she was still thinking about her reputation and what society would think, ticked me off. Was she not concerned about me? About her son? About what I was going through? Did she not realise that I needed her the most right now? These were the questions, the concerns revolving in my mind at that time. 

"Yes, you are right! Some people are still going to talk, right? But why were you being so generous to have given them a topic to talk about? We can try our best to avoid these things so why didn't you?!" She thundered, still glaring at me. And I wasn't sure anymore if she understood what I was trying to say.  

"Do you think I was in control of the situation we were in? Okay, tell me. What were you expecting me to do there at that moment? Just let them be? Ignore them? Or what?" Folding my arms and looking at her, I nodded, urging her to answer me. 

"You could have denied to have known them! You could have avoided confessing that she is your wife and they are your in-laws! You could have-" 

"Oh wow mama! Really? I- I should have done that? You wanted me to do that? But you didn't teach me that. You didn't teach me to run away from my problems! You didn't teach me to leave when people needed me, especially those who are close to me. And for God's sake mama! Accept her! Accept them! At least try to! I- I have already lost her! And I don't even know if I will ever be able to find her... Is that not enough? Is this punishment not enough for me? I- I... Just…" Sighing, I exclaimed in frustration, my voice going quiet by the end as I felt my throat getting clogged. I just wanted to lay my head on mama's lap and let my emotions run free, just like how I used to do when I was a kid and whenever I felt sad or hurt. Closing my eyes, a tired sigh escaped my lips. "I'm sorry if my words hurted you mama, I didn't mean to. I- I would just like to be alone for a while."