Big Bad Wolfie

81) Risks

I kissed Desi's hand with wet lips from all the tears that ran over them, and covered her head with the blanket she was lying beneath.

  I sniffled.

  I thought I'd feel something.

  I felt so much just a few seconds ago, and now it's all gone.

  All I feel is my skin prickling with goosebumps, and something growing in my chest, but my subconscious knows I can't let it out right now.

  I'm sure it's something adjacent to rage and sorrow mixed into an atomic bomb, but the numbness prevails.

  I'm sure my instincts will know better than I do when to unleash it on me. Hopefully it's not at an inconvenient time.

  I stood up and could immediately tell my eyes were red and vibrant by the way everyone looked at me tensely. Like they were on edge or afraid to do the wrong thing.

  I don't know if they're right to be. I feel in control of my talent at the moment, but things like that have been known to change on a dime.

  At least I'm well fed.

  Or the werewolf blood that it smells like I'm drowning in would be a problem.

  I've also been surprisingly good at coping with the magnified heavy breathing shrouding me and the feeling of eyes latched to my back like claws.

  I think standing over the corpse of what used to be like a little sister to me offered some clarity for who the violence inside me should be directed towards.

  It's not myself, not yet, and it's not the people in this barn.

  It's those monsters out there who did this to her.

  I looked to Brandon, who seemed to be the only one in the room that didn't look like he wanted to sh*t himself at the mere sight of me. Makes sense, he's the only one in here who's seen me like this with his own eyes.

  Everyone else is probably just going based off terrible stories that are over exaggerated and embellished. Some were probably true too, though. Dramatic enough to make a good story without lying you're way through it.

  Either way, I can't bring myself to care. All I care about is. . .

  I don't know what I care about.

  I need this all to end so I can figure it out.

  "Let's get to the others," I said to Brandon. My heart felt like it had turned to stone. I could still feel the bomb ready to go off right beneath the surface and the hot tears stained to my face, but it's a weird feeling, because I'm so cold. "Let's end this."

  Brandon nodded with determination in his eyes.

  He gave Desi one last remorseful look, and I sent a quick prayer up to the moon goddess to keep her safe, and we were out of the barn.

  No one bothered to try and stop me to dress my wounds. Brandon just threw a first aid kit into the bag strapped to his back.

  "Stay safe everyone," I threw over my shoulder as I closed the door tight, somehow more somber than when I'd opened it.

  My mind immediately got to working.

  There's already a plan in motion, and it's not even full proof. Barely based on a hunch.

  But I wanna kick it into gear and get it over with now.

  I'm angry.

  Actually, I'm numb.