I Can't Go Back Now (Supernatural- Alexis Hammel)

Fallen Angels

"I think I found the Angel trials, but I don't see anything about a nephilim or a Cupid's bow," Kevin said through the phone. Me, Dean, and Cas were walking through an empty parking lot, while Dean was on the phone with Kevin.

"Oh, come on, Kev. We're on our last leg here, man," Dean said. I looked up and saw someone standing in front of us. Castiel noticed her, too.

"I'm not here to fight you, Castiel," she said. I guess she was another angel. "Not anymore."

"Where is Metatron, Naomi?" Cas asked, and I could hear Kevin had stopped talking.

"He told you he was going to fix heaven, didn't he?" She asked. "Murdering a nephilim, cut off a Cupid's bow- it's a lie. I've been in his head.

"You've been in all of our heads," Cas said. "That's the problem."

"No, Castiel, you're wrong."

"This is what you do," Cas shook his head. "You twist everything. I'm trying to fix heaven. Metatron is trying to fix heaven."

"Metatron isn't trying to fix anything. He's trying to break it."

"Break it how?" I asked.

"Lexi," Cas said, turning toward me, frowning. He looked hurt.

"He wants to expel all angels from heaven, just as God cast out Lucifer."

"Expel?" Dean asked. "To where? Hell?"

Naomi shook her head. "Here. To Earth."

"Lies," Cas snapped. He began to charge at Naomi, but me and Dean grabbed his arms.

"Wait," Dean said.

"Our mission was to protect what God created," Naomi said. "I want nothing more than to see you shut the gates of hell, but if Sam completes those trials, he dies."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Dean asked.

"I saw it in Metatron's head. It was always God's intention, the ultimate sacrifice. I beg you stop this path, Castiel. If you want back, I will listen." After that, she disappeared.

"Kevin, is she lying?" I asked.

"I don't know."

"Well, find out," Dean snapped.

"She's lying," Cas said.

"Take us to him, now," I ordered.

"Lexi-"

"Now!"

***

We arrive at the church, and Cas keeps talking. "I'm fixing my home, you two. I'm not wrong." Cas fluttered away, and I looked around.

"Cas!" Dean yelled.

"Come on," I said, opening the door. Sam's hand was glowing a bright orange and he was about to touch Crowley, which would turn him human.

"Sammy, stop!" Dean called out, and we slowly walked to him. "Easy, Sam. Okay? We've had a change of plans."

"What?" Sam was out of breath. "What's going on? Where's Cas?"

"Metatron lied," I said. "You finish this trial, you die."

"So? Look at how close we are! Other people will die if I don't finish this!"

"Think about it," Dean said. "Think about what we know. Pulling souls from hell, curing demons, ganking a hellhound. We have enough knowledge to turn the tide."

"But we can't do it without you, Sam," I said.

"You can barely do it with me," he retorted. "I mean, Dean, you think I screw up everything I do. You think I need a chaperone, remember?"

"Come on, man, that's not what I meant."

"No, it's exactly what you meant. You want to know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? How many times I let you down and I can't do that again."

"Sam-"

"What happens when you two decide I can't be trusted? I mean, who are you gonna turn to instead of me? Another angel, another vampire?" The word was like venom. "Do you have any idea what it feels like to see your brother just-"

"Hold on, you really think that?" Dean asked. "None of it is true, Sam. I know we've had disagreements, and I know I've said some crap that set you back. But Sammy, I killed Benny to save you. I'm willing to let this son of a bitch-" he pointed at Crowley. "-and all of the bastards that killed Mom walk for you. Don't think that there is anything I'd put in front of either of you," He looked at me. "It has never been like that, and I need you to see that, Sammy."

Everyone was silent, until Sam looked up at us. "How do I stop?" He asked, holding onto his arm as blood dripped from the cut on his hand. The bright orange light had faded.

"Just let it go," I said.

"I can't. It's in me. You don't know what this feels like."

Dean moved forward and wrapped a bandanna around Sam's hand. "We'll figure it out, okay? Just like we always do." He pulled Sam in for a hug, then grabbed my arm and pulled me in, too.

"Let it go, okay?" I said as Sam put an arm around my shoulder.

I watched as the orange glow in his arm faded completely, then Sam backed away. "See?" Dean said, smiling.

Sam smiled back, but then began coughing, doubling over in pain as his body shook. "Sam?" I asked.

"Go get the car started, okay?" Dean said, throwing me the keys. I nodded and ran to the car, getting in the driver's seat and starting it.

I saw them coming out. I got out and opened the back door, but Sam never made it. He fell next to the Impala, and I kneeled next to them. "Sam? Sam?"

"Cas!" Dean yelled, and I began praying. "Sam!"

"Dean," I said after I opened my eyes, looking up at the sky. What looked like meteors were raining down.

"What's happening?" Dean asked, and I looked at him.

"The angels. They're falling."