Man - y.kh

thirty-eight.

"Inmate #94151, you have a visitor." I hate jail, I never wanted to see this place ever again in my life.

Hyungwon stepped into the commons area. "You know, my intimate number isn't clever in the slightest, right?" He rolled his eyes at the guard before catching a glance of me. "Take me back to my cell, please." He said, turning away from me.

"Nice way to speak to the person who's willing to forgive you, Hyungwon." I shrugged. "Sounds like prison's a little bit better than dealing with me. Your family. Is it nice, Hyungwon? Is it pretty?" He still wouldn't turn to look at me, even though the guard wasn't taking him back to his cell like he requested. "Come sit down and face me like the man you act like you are instead of the pussy you truly are." If I knew at least a little bit about him, it was that he couldn't back down from a challenge.

That was the golden ticket. Hyungwon made his way to the table, hesitatingly sitting down. "What do you want, Kihyun?" He asked.

I sighed as I sat down. "I love you, Hyungwon." He scoffed, rolling his eyes as he slouched back. "But, fuck you." I bit my lip, trying to make sure I told him everything I wanted. "You have a habit of making sure people need you. The way you give and give seems to be selfless at first. Then you go bigger and beyond what anyone needs you to do. Then you think they owe you something."

Hyungwon shrugged. "Is that all?" He asked. "I have a wall to go stare at." He rolled his eyes, looking away from me.

"Your son is two years old." Hyungwon froze before laying his head down on the table. "I talked to Akira." Shortly after, Hyungwon began banging his head on the table.

A guard noticed quickly. "Inmate, compose yourself."

He sighed, sitting up again as tears welled in his eyes. "Why? Why? Why the fuck would you ever talk to her?" Hyungwon asked.

"I needed answers that you weren't giving me, Wonho wasn't giving me anything. And who better to ask than someone else who was in a loving, committed relationship with you?" He scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief. "She told me you need help. Everyone is pulling for you to get the help you need. But when she told me that, she kinda knew Wonho was in the room. So she texted me more." No response. I pulled out my phone scrolling through texts. "He helped me as a runaway. I was in an awful foster home with a lot of abuse going on. He knew what that felt like. He'd do any and everything he could for me. He made me love him when I was in no place to love anyone. And when he got mad, he'd completely change. Sometimes, I couldn't even see Hyungwon in his face anymore. Not the Hyungwon I knew. His worst thing is his driving. He's almost caused wrecks when he gets mad. Sometimes he blacks out? Not sure what to call it."

Hyungwon looked up at me. "I didn't mean to hurt you! And I never hurt Akira. And I would've never hurt my son!" Tears finally fell.

"Cry me a fucking river, Hyungwon. The point is she got a restraining order on you, terrified that you were going to actually take your anger out on her." I sighed a bit. "Hyungwon, I love you. But you're controlling. And it's ever so slightly that you would never think you're doing it, and I would never think it really existed. I love you... and I hate you." I stood up, beginning to walk away. "But I don't love you enough to drop the charges."

Hyungwon nodded sadly. "I'm sorry." He whispered.

I shrugged. "I'm not finished. I don't love you enough to drop the charges. But you're Jooheon's rock and Wonho's Changkyun. And I love them enough to drop the charges. They need you. I'm almost 18, I really want to be at a point where I don't need you. I want my father. My family. You've been on the run from your family ever since we met. They love you. I don't know why you won't let them." As I turned my back, Hyungwon stood up.

"Minhyuk's not my family. Jooheon's my family. I lost Kyungwon, Ms. Lee? I can't take that right now. I cannot face her." He admitted.

I shrugged it off a bit. "Why?"

As I walked back to the table, he just crumbled. "She saved my life. And all I've wanted since then is to help people. I know I have an edge, I keep my walls up. But I knew I wanted to make sure anyone I came across that needed help was going to get it. She'd be so disappointed in me." Hyungwon sniffled. "All I want right now is her hugs. But I know I've caused her so much pain... I don't want her to see me like this. This is what she tried to avoid." He sat back down, laying his head down.

I looked at a guard, silently asking him to take his handcuffs off. He nodded coming over to Hyungwon. "Inmate, hands." Hyungwon just put them up, crying softly into his elbow. This is what I needed to see to make my choice. If he showed me nothing, not a damn thing, he'd stay here.

When he realized his hands were free, Hyungwon looked up. "I know what it feels like to just want your parent. To just hold onto them and never let go. To calm down to their heartbeat." I signaled another guard to bring Hyungwon's next guest as I walked over to him.

"Oh my fucking God," Hyungwon whimpered, leaning down into my shoulder, crying. "No, Kihyun you didn't." He mumbled, sniffling softly. I nodded, pulling him off of me for a second. He looked up, shaking his head. "Eommie," he cried out, holding his arms out as he embraced her.

She shushed him softly, tears wetting her own face. "My son, God knows I've missed you." Ms. Lee cried. I helped lead them to sit down making sure Hyungwon didn't fall or take her down with him.

"Eommie, I'm in so much trouble..." Hyungwon cried. "I hurt constantly, but I deserve it. I've caused so much pain. You didn't raise me like this. I'm sorry I've let you down, Eommie. Please... please help me. I-I need help."

The scene not only hit my heart, but it sparked many other inmates to pay attention. "You do not deserve so much pain, Wonnie. Come back home. Please. I'll take care of you, I'll help you. Just talk to me." I wiped my eyes, waiting for a chance to speak up.

I've never heard Hyungwon cry such a heartbreaking cry. This is the cry that others feel in their chest and their throats as their eyes burn. This is the most wayward cry he's ever cried around me. "I-I almost killed them, Eommie... I-I almost killed two of the people I love the most. I got Kyungie killed, Jooheon almost died on me. I-I can't... this hurts. I know what I've done and I can't deal with it."

I kneeled down next to Hyungwon, sighing softly as I held his hand. "Hyungwon," I kissed his cheek. "Go home with your mom, please. I have money for bail, I'll drop these charges... this woman's heart beats for you and Minhyuk and Jooheon. Go home with her. And we'll all get you help." Hyungwon nodded, holding my hand tightly.

I stood up, wiping my tears. "I'll see you within the next couple days." I smiled, walking out of the commons area, letting Hyungwon and his mom spend the rest of his visiting time together.