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#6 - Lovestruck idiot </3

Hi!

Just a little warning, I'm complicated. With that said, I need some advice.

Okay, so I've liked this guy since earlier this year and I've told him and I have no clue where he stands. If he doesn't like me, I'd be completely okay with it - I just want to know.

We text every once in a while, but he never actually starts the conversation...And before he'd say something if we saw each other in school, but now he doesn't.

He also takes ten years and a freaking day (not literally, of course) to text back and I'm getting tired of dealing with it.

Recently, I asked him if he was going to the football game and he said he wasn't. Then he asked if I was going and I told him yea.

Anyway, an hour and a half into the game, I was walking from the concession stand and I saw him. And I know for a fact that he saw me because when I saw him, he was staring right at me.

The thing is that I'm fine witth the fact that he actually went when he said he wasn't going, but he didn't text and say, "Oh, I'm gonna go." Or he could've simply walked up to me and said it then, but he didn't even though he had plenty of opportunities.

Being the civilized person that I am, I didn't tell him off.

I just need to know if I should give up talking to him (and about him), or try to see what the hell is up with him and figure out if he's just an ass or doesn't know what to say.

- Lovestruck Idiot

::

Hey!

Can I just say that you're the first person to actually sign a name at the end of your appeal? Lol, okay then. 

Let's get right on it.

I think when I read your message, I saw a couple of red flags which suggested that you probably should've backed away.

RED FLAG 1: You've already told him that you like him but there's been no response

It's always a different story when the girl tells the guy that she likes him. You see, if the guy doesn't like her back, he may unfortunately begin to avoid her...whereas if the guy told the girl that he liked her, but she doesn't like him back, she'll still talk to him to try and be nice.

I fear that that may be the case here. You mention that he used to talk to you in school and then he stopped? That's a little bit worrying.

RED FLAG 2: He never starts the conversation

This is one thing we all know is a red flag when it comes to talking with guys. If he texts first, you can know that he's interested for sure, but if it's ALWAYS you, then the balance is somewhat off.

Also, you said he takes ages to reply. Sometimes you can't blame it on him, because he may be busy and whatnot, but if he really liked you maybe he would have made an effort.

RED FLAG 3: He doesn't talk to you in school anymore

When guys are shy, they tend to hide behind text, but they also make the effort to talk to the person in school. The fact that his attitude towards you in school has changed, maybe it's because he's just not that into you?

RED FLAG 4: He lied to you about the whole game thing

Or maybe he changed his mind, ya know? Either way, he didn't seem too keen to want to let you know that he was going to be there nor did he seem too keen to want to talk to you during the actual game.

------

To be honest, maybe he isn't worth your time.

But also, there may have been a few things that YOU did that were a "no-no" when you like a guy:

1: You may have told him a bit too early

I think you may have confessed your feelings a bit too early before either of you had established a solid relationship with each other, which means that you may have scared him off before he even got to know you. 

But I guess you can't change that. You kind of just have to work around the fact that he knows now. Be nice, but don't flirt until you feel that he's responding well.

2: More text than talk

One thing that girls need to stop doing is texting the guy a lot because that then means that they dismiss the need to talk in person. Each time you might have gotten the opportunity to talk in real life, you may have been like, "ugh, I'll just text him when I get home." This is a terrible way of trying to get a guy to like you, believe me. You think you may have "something" in those texts, but people are completely different when they text as compared to how they are in real life.

Also, you're always the one who texts first.

Here's what you should do as per texting: stop texting him. 

Hopefully, if he notices that you've stopped and decided to text you, then maybe there's a spark of interest there.

But if you're always the one texting, you'll appear too "easy". He may also be taking advantage of you in delaying his replies. That's not fair to you at all, so I suggest that if he takes ages to reply again just don't text him back. Don't try to have what should be a 2 minute conversation in 2 hours - it's exhausting, a waste of time, and it gets you nowhere.

Another reason I fear he's taking long to text you back may be because he's trying to give you a hint: he doesn't want to text. That's okay too. Not everyone's meant for everyone.

3. You may be a little quiet on your side

So I've noticed that, as active as you may be in texting him, you don't seem to be the same in person. You said things like: "Before he'd say something if we say each other in school, but now he doesn't," and "he could've simply walked up to me and said it then, but he didn't even though he had plenty of opportunities."

Now, the vibe I've been getting from you is that you expect him to be the one to always approach you.

But, why can't you approach him for a change? You can't just shy away in real life and then expect him to see how great you are. At the game, if he was looking straight at you, you could have waved. You may have been pissed off in seeing him,  but you should have acted like it didn't bother you.

All these opportunities he could have talked to you? Why couldn't you have gone up to him?

How about in school, then? If he's not saying anything to you, be the one to take the initiative and GO UP TO THAT MOTHERFUCKER

SHOW HIM HOW GREAT YOU ARE: BE FUNNY, MAKE HIM SMILE, COMPLIMENT HIS SHIRT OR SOMETHING. 

Don't just sit there and expect him to get the message, yea?

::

I don't think you should completely give up on him. Just make yourself a little unavailable on text, but more available in real life. 

But also, try and play a little hard-to-get: talk to a few other guys around, see how he reacts. You don't want to make it completely obvious to him (and everyone else) that he's the one guy you've got your eyes on, so mix it up a little. (Just don't go overboard with it, because you might make the mistake of ignoring him completely and he'll think you're done!)

Playing hard-to-get yet you're still talking to him could actually push him to tell you if he returns his feelings for you.

But, if he doesn't respond positively to you talking to him in real life, maybe you should just forget him. 

Good luck with this one, yea? He's a handful!

- genie_us x