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Hey. I'm writing this at...12:30 in the morning bc I don't want to do it the day of so yeah I'm tired.

Enjoy~

(Y/n)'s POV

If I had even the slightest glimpse into what life without Dan was like I'd immediately hate it. I remember sitting in my sad little apartment playing MarioKart with strangers and now I'm here, sitting in my depressing living room, sick from going out in the rain yesterday.

I hate life.

I sniffles and threw another tissue into the bin, wishing I could throw myself in there. It wasn't just my illness, it was the goddamn fact that I went to get the bastard and he's just gone.

It was clearly stated that he didn't want me around and I knew that, but that didn't help the fact that every time I'm not distracted I'm thinking about him. It's hard to fathom how lonely I actually am.

I'm just better off by myself.

My stomach churned at the revelation. I pulled out my phone to text my mom.

Actually I think visiting for a while would be good. Is the offer still there?

Of course!! I miss you so much. You can stay as long as you want!!

Thanks. I'll be there as soon as I can.

I pulled up a cheap travel agency for a ticket back to America. This would be good. I never seemed to cause trouble back home. There was a good ticket for tomorrow morning, severely early, but it was worth the price. I pressed the book button and immediately headed to my room to pack. No one would really miss me. Zoe would encourage me to go to my mom. Phil might notice my absence, but that really didn't matter.

If he called I wouldn't answer.

If he texted I wouldn't answer.

I'm just better off alone.

I pulled my suitcase from underneath my bed and started with essentials like a phone charger, my passport, etc and packed them in a carry on bag. I put my shoes and clothes in my suitcase and within the hour I was done shoving the majority of my closet in this case.

I sat on my bed and went through my check list. I looked at my phone and there were no notifications, as I should expect from now on. I should go to bed to catch my flight. I hesitated but did, shutting my eyes and holding back warms and burning tears.

I'm not supposed to cry. I shouldn't.

After tossing and turning, I slightly drifted off, but was woken by my alarm. Still no notifications. I should just stop checking. I pulled out of bed and got in the shower, unable to move my face from its stone cold expression. The ride to the airport passed by the coffee shop. That goddamn coffee shop.

"Wait." I choked and the driver stopped to pull over. "It'll only be a minute." I stepped out and left my cab running. I reluctantly entered the small shop and that same worker from last time was there.

"Hey hunny what can I get you?"

"Anything with caramel." I replied with Dan's answer and waited impatiently for the warm cup to passed across the counter. After it was I paid and grabbed it, heading out. I walked out, it still somehow cold in the Spring and headed back to my waiting cab. As I was climbing into the cab I glanced up and saw Dan standing down the street, walking along with Phil. Why were they out this early? Phil noticed me and I only ducked my head, pretending not to notice. The driver took off and past them, Phil watching as we did. I shrunk in my seat.

I knew I was running from my problems, but sometimes that was good. And in my case I think it is. The airport wasn't too crowded due to the early time of the morning. I looked down at my untouched coffee and sipped it. It was cold and had a sour taste in my mouth. I just wasted £4. I tossed it in the trash and the flight was being called. Everything was working out. There was an unexpected buzz from my bag and I swiped at the message so I could see it but not open it.

Where r u even heading?

If only Phil knew. I put it on airplane mode and tucked it back in my pocket. The plane ride was quiet and long, and I ended up sleeping the whole time. My route back home was familiar. This was where I learned to drive. Back on my home street, all the houses so familiar and shade wit large oak trees made me feel suddenly better. I was in a whole different country now.

There were messages on my phone, both Zoe and Phil, it I just let them rest there in my bag as the cab pulled up to my childhood home.

The tree out front had a swing for me and my brother when we were kids and the lawn was unkempt compared to the neighbors who apparently still mow obsessively. The paint was an off white and the porch dusty, an old wagon still there. I knocked and the familiar bark of my old dog rang out. The door opened and my brother Nathan was there the dog at his feet. The dog was getting old as he hobbled around Nate's feet as excited as he could be. I let go of my suitcase and crouched to pet him, Nate nudging me with his foot.

"Welcome back." He said.

"(Y/n)!!" I glanced up at my mom who tackled me in a hug, which I relished in. "You're safe now."

"Hi mom."

"Welcome home."

Dan's POV

"Phil?" He was watching intensely at the cab passing by.

"(Y/n) was in there." He said and my throats caught.

"And I care why?" I asked. Phil just shook his head. After last night we had made up, but Phil was still a tad mad and awkward towards me. I watched as he pulled out his phone. "Don't text her Phil." I said, and he tucked the phone away. "Let's just go home. This wall idea was stupid." He only nodded and we went home. He went straight to him room afterwards, even though we needed to film.

I banged on his door but he didn't answer.

"Come on Phil we need to record." I called. His door opened and he had red and puffy eyes. "Phil."

"Why can't you just get along?" He asked. He was like a poor child who's parents are fighting. I felt bad.

"Phil--"

"She won't answer her texts and I asked Zoe to as well, but she's got nothing either. Where was she going?" He asked.

"I don't know." He scowled and rubbed at his eyes. "I'm sorry." He stopped and looked at me. "I can't help it." He seemed to soften and nodded.

"Let's just record." Phil said. I nodded and walked away and into the gaming room.

Where was she?

Gah

Im seeing A Quiet Place today and I'm excited.

Stay awesome!

~Calymari

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