Fractured

Chapter 67

Chapter 67

Many people would have regretted not praying or going to church more in their life if they knew they were about to die.  But me... I regretted not killing that bitch when I could have.  I could have done it many years ago, many chances I had, so many reasons to do it too.  I had my whole life to kill her.  I just never did because I was scared and knew, in a way, she would win.  I would have ended up going to jail and my life would be screwed up even more. 

But... I realized now that's what I should have done all along.  I should have killed her years ago.  Even if it meant getting locked up.  Even if it meant never meeting Luke because I'd be in prison and she would be dead.  Because... no matter if I was locked up or not, Luke would still have his life to live freely.  He would be free now if I did that back then.  He wouldn't be dead... like he would be soon if it wasn't for me.  The worst part of this, besides it being my fault, was that I wouldn't be dying with him either.  That's the first thing I thought of when that man told me I wasn't going to be killed.  This pit we dug... it was big enough for me too and I just wished that they would understand that.  Why did I need to stay alive?  Why did he need to suffer for all I did?  Why did this need to repeat.... it was just like what happened with Emily.  Only this time, it would be much worse. 

The man who told me I would be coming with him shocked me.  Not only for those words.  But for the reason behind why I apparently will be coming with him....

You can thank your generous father for that...  It rung loud and clear in my head among the chaos of knowing Luke will die.  I could see that in Clare's eyes... her mind determined to make that happen.  And as I stared wide eyed into the man next to her, I knew he wasn't lying either.  Beyond the fear within me and my shaky body came the confusion of his words.  And beyond that... anger and so much hate. 

I narrowed my eyes at him and felt my throat tighten in emotion, just as my hand tightened even more in Luke's hand beside me.  What did he mean father?  Was he joking and trying to confuse me?  Hell... was he my dad?  "What the fuck is that suppose to mean?" I refused his words - and the ones that terrified me the most.  "And I'm not going anywhere.  I'm dying... right here with him," I said, pressing subconsciously into Luke's side even more.  And strangely enough, I felt him press into mine too. 

The man, so professional, took one step closer to where he stood in the grass above our pit until he stood on the edge, looking to us with calculating eyebrows.  He didn't seem affected by my words; just intrigued, something I did not like.  I watched him raised his hands that he clasped together, crossing his arms.  His long face and calm, brown eyes pointed straight at me... I didn't know what to think - or expect from him.  I just knew he said I was living and I had my dad to thank for that.  Can you guys get why that would set me off, make me curious, and make me pissed off?  I felt ready to cry my eyes out!  I even let one more tear fall as I watched him, my teeth grinding as I awaited an answer from his fucking mouth.  

He wasn't snarky, smug, rude, or happy.  Just neutral and business-like if that makes sense when he answered in an almost monotone voice.  "It's because of your father I am here.  He will be in good spirits when I inform him you are safe and in my protection," the guy smiled slightly. "You will know more later.  And, for now at least, you may address me as Reid."

I... had no idea what to think.  A new shipment of questions hit me and I felt ready to break.  I mean... what?!  Did my father send him for me?  And if he did why would that let Clare agree to let me live; I could see how much she wanted to kill me in her eyes.  As strange as it is though, and shocking, it appeared as if she was more set on executing the guy I loved next to me more than me. 

My lips parted, and breathing very hard, I just stared at this guy, Reid I guess, after glancing from Clare.  He might want to take me for whatever reason, might want to collect me while Luke dies... but I wouldn't do that.  I couldn't leave and have them bury his sweet smile and heart into the cold dead Earth.  At just that thought... it felt as if my heart literally broke.  "I'm not going with you!" I screamed at him.  "You take me, I will fight you.  I'll make you kill me.  Because I'm done being someone's bitch!"  I screamed at him, breath hard and moving my shoulders with me as I screamed at him.  He seemed unfazed but I didn't care.  My voice broke as I screamed more at him, so lost and so... felt so gone and lost and... oh god!  Why couldn't we just be happy and away from all this shit?  Now... we won't ever make it.  "I'm done!  And you will burry me... with him,"  I said, my eyes breaking from the man's and I looked up towards Luke.  With his gun still pointed out, I saw his eyes were glazed in front of him too.  Dead and lost and panicked... I hated it.  When he saw me look up to him, he stared down into my eyes and I saw his gorgeous jade and alive eyes find mine.  He squeezed his hand, lips parted as his breath was ridged.  He tried to be calm... he was as calm as he could be upon hearing all this.  When his eyes reached mine though, I saw the hurt.  The real hurt in them.  I watched his eyes start to rim red when he looked down into my begging eyes.