Chapter Ninety-Six "Seeking Solace"

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Knowing that the Thornes were with me at my brother's request, I did not pretend to be sociable at all. I tucked myself into the corner and closed my eyes. If I could sleep, that would be good. If sleep eluded me, at least the need to try to converse with me would be lessened. I spent the entire journey this way, sleeping off and on, just staying to myself. I occasionally caught Mrs. Thorne giving me worried glances. I pretended not to notice and instead I fawned over Jasper.

A trip to Devonshire does not usually take too long, but the winter roads dictated our speed. I prayed that the courier delivered Freddie's letter far faster than the pace we were making. I hoped that when we stopped at Exeter that Uncle Arthur would be waiting at the coaching inn and then he would rush me off to Kensington Park. He and Aunt Catherine doted on the children of his sisters. It was always a special treat to visit them. It had been several years since we've seen them; the last time was the Christmas after Mother and Father did not return. They tried to bring cheer, but it was a difficult time.

If it was not for their gracious invitation for the family to come for Christmas this year, I would not have thought to escape there. I let out a deep breath as I thought to myself, Yes, I am escaping. I was running from my home and family. I was running from my friends. I was running from memories that would not let me forget even if they became more painful each and every day. No one could blame me for running, could they? I did not want to think about that.

No one was waiting for me in Exeter. Even as I sat with the Thornes having tea at the inn, I felt unbearably alone. But wasn't that what I wanted? For everyone to leave me alone so I could accept the decision I made? I absentmindedly stirred my tea, remembering that it was my decision that led me here. Then I thought of Freddie. He was much happier with my decision the other night than he was when he saw me off. Perhaps he was just tired. I'm sure he and Patience were back to making wedding plans by now. Surely they were overjoyed by my choice.

Before it was time to board the coach again, I took Jasper for a walk around the inn. He stayed close to me and occasionally would look up at me and whine. He must have felt as precarious as I did. I picked him up and nuzzled his head, "Don't worry," I told him, "Things will be as they should soon." I took one last look at the town as I headed back to the inn.

"Ah, there she is," I heard Mr. Thorne say as I rounded the corner. Everyone was probably eager to get moving again.

"I'm sorry," I said keeping my eyes lowered, hoping not to warrant conversation. "I wanted to make sure Jasper could stretch his legs."

"Oh, that's good. I thought I was the one holding up everything!" The words rang with joviality and caused me to look up immediately.

"Uncle Arthur!" I squealed running towards him, "Oh it's so good to see you!"

He opened his arms wide to give me a hug but as I came to stand in front of him, cradling Jasper he just looked at the puppy, "Stowaway?"

"Um . . . no," I stammered, "Should I not have brought him?" I looked worriedly at my precious pup.

He immediately started laughing, "Oh the more the merrier!" he said rubbing Jasper behind the ear. He kissed my head and continued, "Come, let's get home to your Aunt Cate, she's positively anxious to see you!"

We sat in his carriage as they moved my trunk, he just watched me for several minutes, "You're the spitting image of your mother," he sighed.

"Thank you," I said shyly, "Freddie's mentioned it too."

"I know it's been hard," his voice heavy with remorse, "especially for you, Margaret." I looked up at him wondering what Freddie must have told him. "But I know your parents would be very proud of the young lady you've become."

I smiled at him thankfully, watching as he checked his pocket-watch. He looked out the window and blinked several times before letting out a breath of sadness. "You miss her too," I said without thinking.

"I do," he nodded, "I did not know to what degree until I saw you though. It's been far too long, dear." I smiled in agreement. "So, what has brought you to us before the others?"

"Didn't Freddie say in his letter?"

"Well," Uncle Arthur scratched the back of his neck, "It was a little difficult to understand. Something about you needing some time away before things change."

He waited for me to finish the thought, "Yes," I sighed, "I guess that's correct."

"Care to elaborate?"

"Can we wait until we get to Kensington?"

"Sure," he said as the coach began to move. "Are you well?"

"I will be," I tried to smile but instead looked down at Jasper who was cuddled against my leg. "Besides, I should probably tell you and Aunt Catherine together."

He watched me for a few moments again, saying nothing. He must have decided to grant my request. It would be at least an hour until we arrived at Kensington Park; that gave me time to decide exactly what they needed to know.

Aunt Catherine was waiting for us, sitting in the parlor window. She began waving frantically from the moment she stepped out the door until the carriage came to a stop. "Oh dear girl," she pulled me into a hug as I stepped out, "I've been so excited!" She ushered me into the house as the snow began to fall. "Let me get a good look at you!" She helped me out of my coat and spun me around with glee. "Isn't she beautiful?" she turned to her husband.

"We've already covered that," Uncle Arthur laughed putting Jasper on the floor. "She's brought a friend too."

They watched as Jasper scampered behind me, "Oh, I'm sure Lady will just love him," Aunt Catherine smiled when Uncle Arthur let out a brief whistle. We all turned towards the hall when we heard footsteps . . . or more like paw pads. Lady was an older spaniel, similar in coloring to Jasper. Their initial hesitance was brief, it was soon followed by tail wags and Jasper followed Lady into the parlor. "Well, now that everyone has met everyone, come! Tell us everything!"

I took a seat on the sofa as they turned their chairs a bit, forming an intimate circle. We exchanged looks a bit before Uncle Arthur broke the silence, "Margaret, what is happening?" His wife nodded at him and scooted a bit closer to me.

"I . . . I'm to be married soon," I sputtered.

"Oh how wonderful!" Aunt Catherine clapped.

"That is indeed good news," Uncle Arthur agreed. "Tell us about your fine young man!"

I stood and walked towards the window, "Hush, Arthur," I heard my aunt whisper, "You don't know that he's young at all."

I felt their eyes follow me as I looked out at the falling snow, "No, he is. He is a very fine gentleman . . . strong and stable. He cares for me greatly." I thought I heard a whisper, but when I turned, I saw them only exchange glances.

Aunt Catherine approached me, delicately placing her hand on my arm, "Do you not love him, dear?"

I looked at Uncle Arthur who held my gaze briefly before he turned away, as if he was privy to a private moment. I inhaled sharply and did my best to smile, "I will." With that, I turned and moved towards the stairs. "I think I will freshen up before supper."

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