So wrong, yet so right

Chapter 4 - What now

23.11.15

I still can't believe what I did. And I still can't seem to forget about it. The fact that he kissed me back. The look on his face as we parted. And when he walked away. Left me standing there, awkwardly questioning myself... What did I do?

I don't know what will happen next time I meet him. If he tells my dad. I'll be dead in no time. But I don't think he will. My dad would defend me, and be angry with him instead. Even though It wasnt his fault. 

xo

_____

I spot Rory by her locker as I walk in the hallways in my school. I approach her, knowing I need to talk about what happened last week.

"Hey. I need to talk to you"

"About what?" she asks, but easily she figures what I'm going to talk about. "Oh.."

"So, I kissed him"

"You did?" she says, shocked.

I nod. "And he kissed me back. But then after the kiss, he just left"

"Oh girl! He is feeling something, trust me"

"That's why he walked away?"

"Of course. He couldn't stay, obviosly because he has a woman, and he wouldn't risk anything"

"Well, he risked a lot when he kissed me back"

She grins. "Guess he just couldn't help it"

I sigh as I think about what I have to do later - Talk to him. As much as I don't want to, it is the only thing to do. Unless I want it to be awkward between us everytime he hangs out with my dad.

I got home from school earlier as our last class of History was canceled due to our teacher who was sick. Though, that didn't bother me. The home was empty when I arrived, which wasn't strange at all since both my parents were at work. 

I went over to the window, and peeked out. I looked over at Michael's house, noticing his car was outside. He is home at least. I wonder if he is thinking about me, like I'm thinking about him. Though, I'm pretty frigthened. Scared about what will happen next. Maybe it will be even more awkward around him than before, when it only was me having a crush on him. While now, my lips has touch his. And that's even more awkward.

I sighed, and walked away from the window. It wasn't going to help me anything by starring out the window. Yet, I didn't know anything that would help me.. Unless  payed him a visit to speak to  him. Though, I might end up meeting his girlfriend then..

After a lot of pondering whether or not to do it, I make up my mind.. and courage to walk over to him. I put on my shoes, walk outside, close the door behind me and walk directly over to his property.

My heartbeat starts rasing as I'm approaching his house. I take one deep breath before ringing the doorbell. And now I've done it. I can't go back, unless I run away and he will think it was just some kids playing ding dong ditch.

I eagerly await for the door to open. To see his face. He will probably be shocked when he sees me. And I might have difficulities speaking.

Suddenly the door opens, breaking me out of my thoughts. I stand up straight, and bring on a smile. "He...." I begin. But stop as soon as I notice who it is. It's Alice.

"Oh hey! Rebecca right?" she asks, smiling.

She is standing in, what seems, nothing but a bathrobe. Her hair looks messy.. Guess he hasn't told her about what happened. Then again, why should he. 

I try to smile, but feel like it looks fake. I wasn't happy seeing her. 

"Yes. Uhm, yeah..." Suddenly every word vanishes. I don't know what to say. I wanted to speak to Michael. Alone. But now that she already is here, I can't do it. Though I know she will tell Michael I was here.

"Was there anything you wanted?"

I shake my head. "No.. " I hesitate.  "It was nothing important really. Just wanted to tell Michael I appriciated him coming to check on me the other night"

"Yeah! That's right. He told me.. He is such a good guy" 

I smile. Not saying a word.

"Well. I'll pass on the message. He will be very happy to hear from you" She smiles friendly. 
"Sure. Thank you" I smile, and turn around.

"Bye then!" She calls after me. And I turn slightly around again. "Bye" Though I don't think she heard it. I continue walking towards my house again, sort of regretting I walked over in the first place.

Author's note;

Hey everyone! I'm truly sorry for not updating. Things have been crazy. But I try to write as much as I an.

Hope you enjoy this part !! xo

Love x