A Place In This World

Breathe

Taylor's POV

I see your face in my mind as I drive away.

Cause none of us thought it was gonna end that way.

None of us rested that night. Every so often someone would burst into tears. By the end of the night we hadn't heard any news and everyone looked numb. I stared at some random spot on the wall. All I could think about was the times we had together, and how I would never be able to say everything I ever wanted to say to him. I loved him, and I never had the chance to say just how much.

Finally, the doctor came. My heart started pounding in my chest. I prayed he had good news. I looked up at him through my misty eyes.

"He's on life support, but you can come visit him now," he said shallowly.

Music starts playin' like the end of a sad movie.

We all got up and slowly followed him. I'm not sure if any of us really wanted to see what had happened to Josh. We followed the doctor through the hallway, and into the emergency room. We followed him for a little more and then he stopped in front of Josh's bed.

It's the kinda ending you don't really wanna see.

I was shaking head to toe. I wasn't sure if I was ready for this or not. He moved the curtain, and my jaw dropped. Fresh tears slid down my face.

'Cause it's tragedy and it'll only bring you down.

Josh had horrible, horrible bruises all over himself. Although an oxygen mask covered most of his face, I could still see enough to make me sick. His poor, beautiful, face. He had a bandage wrapped around his head, the white fabric stained red from the blood. His closed eyes were completely black underneath, eventually fading to a sickening purple as they traveled lower down his cheeks. His dark nose was covered by a bandage.

On his left upper arm, a thick bandage covered what could only be where the antlers had pierced him. Many other bandages covered his bruised arms, where glass had cut. Many tubes streamed out of his forearms, connecting with complicated machines. I could only imagine that under the covers the rest of his body was riddled with cuts and bruises.

Seeing him like this broke my heart. I wiped away the tears, but new ones just took their place. I couldn't believe this happened to him. Even seeing him all banged up, I felt this was just a movie, or something. That this was all pretend; but it wasn't.

Why did this always happen to the people who deserved it the least?

Now I don't know what to be without you around.

3 days passed since he arrived in the hospital. He had been transferred yesterday to a closer one, even though he wasn't doing any better. I swear the bruises looked like they were getting darker. Or maybe that was because my world was darker. I sat in the plush seat next to the bed, listening to the machines beep and click. I looked at his closed eyes. I hadn't seen those beautiful crystal blue orbs in person since he left on tour.

"Well Josh, it's been 3 days since you had your accident. Nothing has really happened. It's like the world has stopped spinning. I wonder everyday if you can here me, in your coma. If not, than I guess I'm just going crazy and talking to you even though you're not listening. You always were a good listener-" I stopped to choke back a sob. I had been crying way too much lately. "I don't think I've left this hospital for more than a few hours. Just to go home take care of the pets for a while then race right back here. I can't stand being away from you. What if something happened while I was gone? What if you-anyways, it's the beginning of December and it hasn't snowed yet. Like I was saying, the world has just stopped."

Tears started to well up in my eyes.

You're the only thing I know like the back of my hand.

"Please, please, don't go. I can't breathe without you. I need you. Here with me. Healthy. Please wake up."

I let the tears flow freely down my face. No use in hiding them in front of a person who-dare I say it-might never wake up. Then I did the only thing I knew how to do right.

I began singing softly to him.

"And I can't breathe

Without you, but I have to

Breathe

Without you, but I have to." I had his hand wrapped in mine. I was rubbing the back of it with my thumb. "Its two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend

Hope you know it's not easy, easy for me

Its two a.m., feelin' like I just lost a friend

Hope you know this ain't easy, easy for me."

I heard foot steps behind me. I turned my head to see Matt, Ian, and Mike walk in. All wearing grim expressions.

We said our hellos and then Matt reached into his bag.

"This was one of the few things salvaged from the crash. Take it."

I looked up. It was Josh's jacket. I reached over and took it. I quickly threw it over my shoulders and slipped my arms in. I sighed into it. It was like he was there, if only just for a moment, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me in for a tight cuddly embrace. It smelled like him.

"Thank you," I said hoarsely.

I then decided to leave. I guess I had to share him with other loved ones. It was difficult, but I managed to unglue myself from my seat, and slowly walked away.

I got in my car and drove. When I got to our house, that we hadn't even been living in together for more than a month, I flew myself onto the bed and cried. The only thing that seemed right at a time like this was to let tears flow.

Sadness wasn't always a bad thing. Letting tears flow was a therapeutic feeling. But it was the absence of feeling, that really hollowed out kind. That's what hurt the most. That's what the most terrifying thing was.

Never a clean break, no one here to save me

Im sorry its so short, but i really donnt know what else to add... let me know what you think!