Power and Wisdom

PaW miserable

Thena's POV

I closed the front door dragging my feet on the floor. I didn't even bother turning on a light as I fell face first onto the couch. I was too exhausted from work to take the time to pull it out into the bed.

It had been a rough few weeks. I have been working myself to the point I can't hardly function anymore. Working doubles seven days a week, open to close. I have to keep myself busy. Not only to keep my mind off the boys I left behind but to keep a place to stay. I needed the out of date studio apartment above the diner and I keep telling myself that they need me because they are short staffed. They really do need another worker, but I could afford to take a couple days off or only work one shift a day. Plus  I know I am over working myself and so does everyone else.

The day I came into town Sandra Lyne, or Sandy as she prefers to be called, found me curled up in the booth asleep. It was close to their dinner rush and she was surprised to find me still there. She gently shook me awake and told me it was time to go home and I had burst into tears because I had no home. Again. Not even my Fierro. That was taken to the junk yard for scrap the first week I was with the boys and I never got a new car because I didn't have need of one. Jiro or one of the other guys took me where I needed to go or I would drive one of their many cars.

Once I calmed down some Sandy took my hand and pulled me upstairs to the small studio apartment. I was told that I could take a couple of days to clear the place of dust before working downstairs in the diner waiting tables.

The place was small with only a living room that had a kitchen on one side and a small bathroom big enough to hold a bathtub, toilet, and pedestal sink. The paint on the walls was peeling in places and dust covered the out of date appliances. The once cheery yellow counters looked faded and warped and the brown shag carped had seen better days.

Like I said before, its been a long few weeks. I woke up early like usual, only having about 4 hours of sleep, and rolled off the couch. I didn't even get up as I peeled off my uniform from the day before and crawled naked to the bathroom not bothering to stand up. I climbed into the tub and turned the water on pulling my knees up to my chest. I feel so lonely and empty without my boys, my pack. That's what they were... my pack, unofficially. Even though I am not a werewolf, they are my family.

Sitting in the shower I use my vanilla soap set from Jiro and cried until I couldn't cry anymore the water washing away my tears. I wash my hair and pull myself from the shower and dry myself off. I pull my waist length hair into a messy bun not bothering to brush it... again, and brush my teeth after putting on my extra uniform.

I head downstairs to start the coffee for myself and the early customers. Just as I am reaching for a mug the lights flick on.

"AAhh!" I hear the scream and drop the mug with a smash and whirl around with my hand over my racing heart. "Thena! Oh gosh girl! No wonder I screamed when I seen you standing there! You ain't only sneakin' like a ghost but you look like one!" Sandy looks at me like like I will fall over any second. Which I very well could.

I look to the mug on the floor and burst into tears. Again. I didn't think I could cry anymore but I was wrong again.

"Oh sweetie! That man doesn't deserve your tears!" Sandy runs to me and and gathers me into a tight hug. "you just go on back upstairs and lay down a while. I can call my sister to cover for you." She was dabbing at my wet tear streaked face with her sleeve.

"NO! I can't go up there by myself! I practically yell. Then my voice cracks and I plead with her, "Please don't leave me alone." More tears well up in my eyes.

 Sandy looks at me with pity. She thinks I'm heartbroken over a boyfriend and that I left after some breakup and I haven't told her any different. I am heartbroken and depressed but its not from a break up. I'm not myself... No more laughter... just sadness.