Chapter 44: The Letter

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Dear Precious,

As you already know, I've never penned down my thoughts before, let alone write what I feel. So, please bear with me as I stumble through this unfamiliar territory.

I would much rather say this all to you myself, but you left, binding me with the weight of your words. And I need you to know that I respect you more than anything. You said, you didn't want me to follow you, so even though it pains me, I respect your wish for some space.

I know you don't even want to see me right now either. That's why I'm writing this letter. As an attempt to let you know what I feel. I'm just afraid that these mere words on paper may fail to convey the depth of my feelings.

But here we go.

First of all, I am very sorry, baby. For the terrible mistake I made. The one that fractured the fragile bond of trust between us.

My misconception made me commit the biggest mistake of my life. I kept thinking, that the only way to make you completely mine, was through a contract. A contract that'll bind you to me, forever. And in an attempt to make you mine, I lost you even more.

I was so sure of my fixation about obsession over love, that I failed to realise that you became all mine, the moment you said that you loved me.

Just like I became all yours, the moment your eyes met mine. Because that was the exact moment, I fell in love with you, Precious.

It was the exact moment I decided, that you, Roop, will forever be my Precious. The most Precious Person in my life.

You were right, I am an idiot. I didn't even realise that I'd fallen in love with you, have been in love with you all this time and didn't even tell you. Maybe this is my punishment for that.

By the time, I got to know, what I feel for you is love, it was too late.

To be honest, I never believed in love. It was a mere, shallow word for me. Unlike Obsession, love felt futile, weak and a word without a perfect meaning.

I always thought, obsession was the driving force of love. Obsession was the real feeling. That obsession was the root of all feelings. It derived the intensity of emotions I always sought.

I was so convinced that I failed to realise when my obsession turned volatile and destructive. I failed to realise how my obsession was derived by nothing but possessiveness, control and unhealthy fixation over you. And this ended up, destroying the most Precious thing I had, us.

But just like always, you flipped my world with your one word. You flipped my beliefs too. You became the new definition of Love for me, baby. You became the one who made me realise that love, true love was so much more than mere obsession.

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