Chapter 48 : heartbeats in doubt

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"The number you have dialed is no longer in service." After hearing this damning message, I let the phone slip from my trembling hand, its screen casting an eerie glow in the dimly lit room. I curled up on the sofa, cocooned under a blanket, seeking comfort in the darkness that enveloped me. The television flickered in the background, its sound reduced to a mere whisper, echoing the emptiness that now filled my heart.

As the doorbell pierced through the quiet of my solitude, I hesitated, unable to muster the strength to answer. Yet, it persisted, chiming relentlessly, until I let out a resigned sigh and dragged myself from the depths of the couch, the heavy blanket trailing behind me.

With each step, I felt the weight of exhaustion pulling me down, but I pushed forward nonetheless, driven by a curiosity that outweighed my weariness. Opening the door, I was met with the unexpected sight of Heidi, Tina, and Marima standing before me, their arms laden with pizzas, chips, and drinks.

When they entered my dimly lit apartment, the atmosphere changed, becoming somehow lighter, as if their presence had chased away the shadows of despair, if only for a moment.

"Come on, Char, no more tears," Heidi said with a playful grin. "You've already bought out the entire tissue aisle at the grocery store."

Tina chuckled, nudging me lightly. "Yeah, we're running out of tissues for ourselves," she added with a wink.

"We're not leaving until we see a smile from you," Marima declared gently, her eyes reflecting sincerity.

I couldn't help smiling at them. As I settled on the sofa, I felt a glimmer of warmth in the midst of sadness. The girls joined me, bringing pizzas and snacks, and we chose a movie to watch together.

While the aroma of the freshly baked pizza filled the room, I found myself picking at my slice, my appetite diminished by the weight of grief that had settled in my stomach. With each bite, the memories of shared meals with Engfa flooded my mind, a bittersweet reminder of a time when food tasted sweeter and laughter came more easily.

Despite my friends' attempts to coax me into eating more, my appetite remained elusive, overshadowed by the ache of loss that seemed to gnaw at my insides.

"I can't. I'm not hungry," I protested weakly, pushing the half-eaten slice away.

Tina chimed in, her voice laced with concern. "You need to eat, Charlotte. You can't keep starving yourself like this. It's not good for you."

Marima nodded in agreement, her tone gentle but firm. "Yeah, Char, we're worried about you. You need to take care of yourself."

I sighed, feeling the weight of their worry pressing down on me. "I know, guys, I just... I can't seem to eat," I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.

Heidi reached out, resting a comforting hand on my shoulder. "We understand, but you have to try. Engfa wouldn't want to see you like this," she said softly.

Tina shot a quick elbow to Heidi's side, her expression stern as she shot her a warning glance. It was a silent reminder that tonight was supposed to be about distracting me, not dwelling on Engfa.

Heidi winced slightly, realizing her slip-up. "Sorry, I didn't mean to..." she began apologetically before Tina cut her off with a pointed look.

"It's okay," I interjected quickly, offering them a weak smile to reassure them.

As we watched the movie, we couldn't help but get caught up in the storyline, occasionally commenting on the scenes or sharing a laugh at the comedic moments. For a brief moment, I managed to divert my thoughts and immerse myself in the film, trying to enjoy the company of my friends.

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