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Jake heaves a sigh of relief as he sat on his chair. He's finally back at his office, with only the paper works as his problem.

Well, there is one that he's been thinking about. Sunghoon's birthday gift. As usual, he stayed up late last night, not because of what he has been doing for the past week but because of thinking and searching of what he should give his boyfriend as a present.

Also, he still has to apologize to Sunghoon. He was so understanding that Jake almost forgot Sunghoon needs the attention too. Jake was so in deep of his own grief, he hadn't thought someone would also be affected. Park Sunghoon. His boyfriend.

For a whole week of locking himself while waiting for his own despair to go away, someone on the other side of the door is waiting too as their own despair envelope them. Jake was selfish.

With pure determination to make it up to Sunghoon, he finishes his work early- earlier that he thought was his earliest.

. . .

The training has ended. Sunghoon ruffles his hair as he walk to Jay's table to claim his keys. "Where's my car keys?" He asks, exhausted.

"What? I don't have it?" Jay tilts his head with his eyebrow raised.

"Well, I don't have it either." Sunghoon starts to be frustrated. He hasn't got much sleep for the past days because of the higher-ups' demands to have their final trainings everyday. 8 am to 8pm. It's a bit shitty considering that he and his fellow astronauts have went to space at least twice now. 'Just for safety precautions', they say. Eh, still shitty.

"Seriously, I don't have them." Jay insists.

"Seriously, I don't have them either." Sunghoon answers back. His eyes were already starting to close, every time he blinks it just gets longer.

"Dude, you alright? I don't think you should be driving."

"If you just give me my keys now then I can already go. Stop making this hard for the both of us."

Jay closes his desktop as he packs his belongings. "I already told you, I have no idea where they are. I'll just drive you home."

"I won't just leave the car here. I rented that." Sunghoon follows his gaze to Jay leaving the premises. After his friend disappears out of his sight, he knew he would have to just follow him.

"Oh, Jake went to work a while ago." Jay says, casually opening the car door.

"Stop playing. I checked his office a while ago. He's not there. Juts give me the keys." He groans.

Jay looks at him confused. "You really check his office every day? You're that deep." His friend laughs, earning a punch on the shoulder from Sunghoon. "Ow, check his office again then." This boosts Sunghoon's energy for a bit.

"Really? Is he still at his office?" Jay shrugs before Sunghoon rushes back inside. He thinks of what he should say, whether he starts with words of comfort or ask him what took so long. He'd prefer the first one, he'd be a real asshole if he just confronts Jake for taking time for himself.

Opening the door to his office, almost destroying it, Sunghoon looks around. To his disappointment, no one was there. Everything usual was still there, except for a small sticky note on the computer screen. He reads it, frowning.

I'm sorry :(

Sunghoon smiles. He can never hate his boyfriend. No matter how long he waits or how much he has to endure, Sunghoon knows Jake will come back to him. To his arms. And that's what makes him hold on despite all of his waiting- the feeling of comfort when he finally wraps his arms around his boyfriend. His home.

With the sticky note on his hands, Sunghoon goes back outside. He sees Jay grinning at him, looking at what he's holding. "Here's your keys, loverboy." Jay throws the key towards his direction.

Snatching it on the air, Sunghoon turns his back to Jay; raising his middle finger before he goes inside his car.

"Yeah, I'd rather not." He hears his friend shout to him, making him smile.

. . .

Sunghoon parks the car. Not to his hotel room but Jake's apartment. He sees the lights open from down the street. He can't help but smile for the 5th time. At last, Sunghoon can feel the comfort of his own home again.

Going up using the elevator, his adrenaline rises. Seeing the floor number on the screen as the doors open, he sprints. Perhaps Jay is not wrong about him deep in love, enough for him to drown but not to die.

But as long as it's Jake we're talking about, he would not have thought twice and hesitated. He knocks on the door, though neighbors could mistaken it for pounding instead of knocking.

The door swings open. A pair of arms envelope him for a hug, Sunghoon hugs back. "I'm sorry." He hears Jake mumble through his shirt. "You should be." He jokes.

Jake broke the hug to close the door. Sunghoon stares at him, and as soon as Jake turn around to stare back at him. They went for another hug. Exactly like home. They were each other's solace.

Sunghoon hears Jake breaking into sobs on his shoulders. He strokes Jake's hair, smiling. "I'm here now. Don't worry."

"I'm sorry." Jake repeats.

"You have nothing to apologize about. Stop."

Jake looks at Sunghoon as a tear fell down his cheek. "You deserve a lot of apologies from me. Is there a way for me to just put them all into one?" Jake sounded serious but Sunghoon laughed it off.

"Having you in my grasp now is enough. Should we just talk?"

. . .

They stare at the night sky, lying down the bumper of the car. Sunghoon drove them to a cliff, where they could have the scenery all by themselves.

It felt so peaceful and calm. The city lights shine bright below them but it can't outshine the moon and its stars. The slight gush of the wind and snow falling sets the tone just about right for the both of them.

The silence helped them read each other's thoughts. Sunghoon breaks it first.

"Every time I look up the night sky, I always learn one thing." He mumbles.

"What is it?" Jake asks, looking at him as he continued staring up.

Sunghoon keeps quiet then he smiles as he returned his boyfriend's gaze. "That there's always hope no matter how bad a situation is; just like how stars continue to shine even in the darkest nights."

Sunghoon means it. It's always been the words that kept him motivated and see the world from a positive point of view. He never shared that to anyone as he never really had a meaningful conversation; except now.

"You think so?" Jake asks.

"I know so." Sunghoon sits up, Jake following. "You're a star, Jake. The most beautiful one out there." He holds his boyfriend's hand, pulling him closer. They bring their foreheads together. Sunghoon looks at him lovingly, like a rare jewel he'd always protect.

For him, Jake is his hope, his shining light. He would give up everything he has just to see him glowing.

Then, under the dim moonlight, the slow falling of snow, the patterned flow of the wind, and the glistening stars; they kiss.

. . .

I don't know anymore :,)

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