As Helena left her room in the morning, she found Meredith and Derek arguing in the hallway.
"Stop. I do not need rescuing." She told him.
"You would have drowned in the bath had I not been there." He argued.
"I'm a surgeon, I do the rescuing. You are not my knight in shining... whatever."
"So we're gonna fight because I pulled you out of the bathtub?"
"You have a place. You can sleep at it and then you don't have to pull me out of the bathtub. You are everywhere all the time, saying things." She told Derek.
"Well, that is kind of how relationships work..." Helena butted in. "Good morning." She walked past them to go to the bathroom.
She used the toilet and, once she left, Meredith told her. "I did not try to drown myself in the bathtub."
"Hey, I ate everything out of the fridge last night. Everything, including a tub of butter." Izzie answered.
"And I rely on medication to function mentally. I'm not judging." Helena joked, smiling.
"You ever feel like you are disappearing?" Meredith asked them.
"All the time." Izzie answered.
"Sometimes I feel like I'm dead already." The short girl sighed, putting her shoes on.
"Why can't I just be that happily ever after person and why can't I believe in that?"
"I don't know what I believe anymore." The former model told her.
——
As the interns were getting ready in the locker room, Cristina kept staring at Meredith and Helena.
"What?" The brunette asked, smiling, amused.
"Nothing..." She answered suspiciously, turning back to her locker.
A few seconds later, Cristina was staring at them again. "What?!" The blond yelled.
"Ok, cranky, forget it!"
"As I the only one that thinks this triage test is a waste of time? There's surgery on the board that Sloan would let me scrub it... Would it be too much to ask to be preforming actual surgeries? We are actual surgeons." Alex complained.
"Yeah, but we're also actual doctors that might need to triage if an actual emergency happens." Helena told him, noticing Cristina's eyes on her once more."Jesus, Cristina, just spit it out." She complained.
——
Later, Bailey told them. "You have to be quick and thorough while using your instincts. You can't be fooled by what your eyes see. If you asses wrong, your patient could die while waiting for treatment."
As Izzie and Alex complained, she continued. "People, triage is one of the most important tools a doctor has. In a real emergent scenario, you'll have only minutes."
"And it's something you'll be tested on on your surgicals." Callie told them, looking to the side once a camera flashed, coming from George.
"Sorry. I was just recording the drill." He smiled as Callie took him aside.
Suddenly, the Chief entered the room. "People, sorry, I have to interrupt the session for a moment."
"Do you need something, sir?" Bailey asked.
"We just received word of a mass casualty incident nearby. All available level one trauma centers have been asked to respond, I need to send a team into the field immediately." He told them.
"Is this apart of the exercise? Are we supposed to act appropriately tense?" Cristina asked, Helena hitting her on the arm.
"This is not an exercise or drill, Yang. It's an emergent situation and I need all hands on deck."
"What happened, Chief?" Helena asked.
"I don't have details, just orders."
The interns quickly grabbed their jackets and triage kits, hurrying for the exit.
"We're catching a ride with Seattle 34. Space is tight so hold you kits on your lap." Bailey told them.
"Where are we going?" George asked.
"We'll know when we get there."
"Fire, flood, volcano? I'm not really dressed for a volcano." Izzie joked.
"Stevens!" Bailey scolded.
"Sorry, inappropriate, sorry."
As they approached the ambulance, the paramedic told them. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, I'm taking supplies, I only have room for five."
"Yang, Campos, stay with the Chief, take care of the incoming. The rest of you, come on." The resident told them.
"Wait, I'm tiny, I can fit!" Helena told her, wanting to tag along.
"Ok, fine, squeeze in, Helena."
In the ambulance, everyone seemed nervous. "Everybody, move your IDs to the outside of your jacket. When we get there, remember, triage. Karev?"
"Green tags, non emergent. Yellow tags, delayed care. Red tags, immediate treatment." He told her.
"Good. Access carefully, tag, and get critical patients to the ambulances as fast as possible. Don't get in the way of search and rescue and stay calm." The resident instructed, Helena nodding.
"Do we know what happened yet?" She asked.
"All we know is that there are multiple traumas."
——
As the ambulance stopped, they rushed to get out, finding chaos all around. A ferry had crashed, there were now multiple injured and people running all around. The sound of several people yelling and the occasional scream filled the air.
"Dr. Bailey, where do you want us?" Izzie asked, shocked.
"I don't have time to hold your hands, you know the protocol, go do it." She yelled over the noise.
"Do what?" Alex asked.
"Go help people."
At that, the interns spread out, attempting to help those who needed it.
Helena started by noticing a woman laying in the floor, some burns on her hand. "Hi, I'm Dr. Campos, can you please tell me where it hurts?"
"Just... just my hand." She told her, the doctor holding her hand and analyzing the wounds.
"Ok, you'll be ok, you're injuries are minor. An EMT will take you to the hospital soon." The doctor answered, calling one to take care of the woman, tagging her with a green tag.
Suddenly, Helena felt a hand on her arm. As she turned around she found a girl with a few cuts in her face. She couldn't be older than eight.
"Are you a doctor? A doctor or a nurse or... or something?" She asked, scared.
"Yes, I am. Are you hurt?" She asked.
"Please, come with me." The girl asked, grabbing her hand.
"What's your name, honey?" Helena asked the girl, lowering herself to her level.
"Emma." She answered.
"Ok, Emma, do you know where your parents are?" The child shook her head. "Ok, we need to get you checked out, we have a treatment area over there." The intern pointed towards the area, as the girl shook her head.
"No, it's... Mike, my brother... please come." She asked, pulling the doctor's hand. Understanding the little girl's panic, she followed her closely. "There!" She told the doctor, once they arrived.
At the sight before her, Helena's heart dropped. There was a little boy, maybe about four years old, laying on the floor, a deep gash in his abdomen. A gash large and deep enough to where she could see his bowel.
"Oh, god." She whispered to herself, quickly kneeling by the little boy. "Ok, ok... Deep wound to the abdomen. First, clean the wound." As she put a hand on the little boy's shoulder, he looked to her, conscious and crying out with pain.
"I want mommy!" He said.
"Oh, I know, Mike, I know...I'm a doctor, you can call me Lena. I'm going to try to take care of you, ok?." She told him while getting saline solution out of her bag.
"Ok..." He muttered.
"Emma, I need you to do something for me, ok? I need you to try not to look while I take care of your brother. Can you do that for me?" The doctor asked as the little girl turned around, nodding.
"Ok, Mike, this is going to hurt a bit, but I promise it's so that you can get better." At that, the doctor started disinfecting his wound with the solution, as the boy cried out. "I know, I know it hurts, I'm so sorry." She bit her bottom lip in concentration as she thought through the next steps. "First, disinfect the wound. Second, pack the wound... alright." She whispered under her breath as she reached for some gauze.
"Lena, is Mike going to be ok? I can see his stomach..." Emma pointed out, worried, looking over her shoulder.
"I... I'm going to take care of him, Emma." Helena answered, knowing the little boy's odds weren't the best. "But don't look, ok, sweetie?" The girl nodded, turning back around as Helena opened the pack of gauze she had brought. "Mike, honey, this will hurt a little again, ok?" She warned as she started packing the wound and the boy cried out.
"I want mommy! Emma, I want mommy." He cried out, some blood coming out of him mouth.
At that, the little girl was still facing the other way, she attempted to reassure her brother. "It's gonna be ok, Mikey, Lena's taking care of you."
Quickly running out of the gauze she had, Helena looked around, not finding anyone around her that could help. "Ok..." She took a deep breath. "Emma, I'm going to need your help, ok?"
"But I don't wanna..." The girl pouted slightly.
"I know, I know it's really scary. But you'll be like my assistant, ok? Come on, why don't we even make it a game?" At that the little girl seemed to perk up, making Helena continue. "The game is called... hum, find the object. So, you're going to go in my bag right there and try to find something that looks like a small towel, ok?" She asked the girl, who nodded, as she moved to the bag, looking through it.
Once she found the gauze, Emma raised it to the adult. "Did I win?"
"Yes, yes, sweetie, you won. Can you bring it to me, now?" Helena asked, still worried about the boy bleeding out in front of her. As the girl handed her the gauze, she kept packing the would as Emma turned her back to them once more.
As the gauze ended again, Helena realized she'd run out of it. "Oh, oh god... ok. Ok, it's ok." She muttered under her breath, closing her eyes to think.
Once they snapped open, the girl took off her jacket and scrub top to remove her long sleeve, which she though should be cleaner as it hadn't been in contact with the exterior. Now in her bra, she quickly pulled her scrub top back on, before rushing to pack the wound with her piece of clothing.
"Ok, now we should just have to wait a little." She attempted to smile reassuringly at the girl. However, once she looked up, she noticed that Mike had become pale and still, her expression falling. Grabbing his wrist, she quickly realized how week his pulse was. "Come on, Mike, come on..." She whispered, still applying pressure. Looking down at her hands, however, she found he was still bleeding out, her efforts hadn't been enough. "Oh, come on... come on!" The boy was starting to get ice cold, she noticed, as she took her bloody gloved hands off of the wound.
"Just keep looking forward, Emma." The doctor instructed, putting a hand on the boy's neck to feel his pulse. It was gone. Helena's heart broke at that, tears already forming in her eyes.
Silently, she allowed herself to cry for a second. This little boy, an innocent child, has just died in front of her. She hadn't been able to save him, she hadn't been able to keep him alive. And, now, he was dead. Pulling herself together, she closed the boy's eyes, the last tear running down her cheek.
"Is he ok, Lena? Is he better?" The innocent girl asked her.
Sniffling, Helena got up, after wiping her tears, lowering herself to the girl's level. "Emma, honey, we need to get you to the treatment area now, so they can have a look at you." She explained.
"But what about Mikey? Is he ok?" The girl asked, Helena fighting her tears.
"He's... he's taking a little nap right. We just have to go take care of you, now, and look for your parents, ok?" She asked, patiently.
"No! I didn't wanna go? I wanna stay with Mike." The child refuted.
"I know, honey, but now we have to go. Let's find mommy and get you checked out." At that, the intern picked up the little girl that put her arms around her neck, hugging her.
"You promised you'd take care of him, Lena! You promised..." The girl cried, understanding something wasn't right.
At that, another tear fell down the doctor's cheek, as she carried the girl to the treatment area.
——
After taking the girl to the treatment area, Helena proceeded to find if anyone else needed her help. Suddenly, she saw Derek coming out of the water, a hypothermic Meredith is his arms.
"Oh my god, Derek, what happened?" The girl asked, entering the ambulance along with them.
The man did CPR on her, not looking away as he answered. "I don't... I don't know, she was... she was in the water." He told her, his voice broken.
Helena's eyes filled with tears at the sight of her friend, so cold, fragile, defenseless... A few seconds after, she turned to the man, who was panting from the effort. "Derek, do you want me to take over?"
"No, no, I have her." He told her.
Once they arrived at the hospital, Bailey opened the ambulances door, the paramedic telling her. "Jane Doe, hypothermic."
"She's not Jane Doe, it's Meredith, Meredith Grey!" The intern told them, tears in her eyes, as Bailey and Derek rushed to wheel her out of the ambulance.
Once Helena got inside, she leaned against the hall, attempting to control her quickening breathing as she hurried to page her friends. As all her friends joined her, no one spoke, until Cristina arrived.
"It's Meredith?" She asked.
"Yeah." George answered, Helena looking forward with a certain emptiness on her face.
"Are you sure? Did you see her? Because..." The woman tried to argue.
"It's Meredith." Alex grabbed her arm as she tried to go through the doors. "Lena saw her."
"Oh." She let out as George started crying.
"She will come through this." Izzie told Cristina.
"You don't know that." George answered, crying, as Helena still looked into the space on front of her, a tear rolling down her cheek.
"She will come through this." The blond repeated.
"People die." The shorter man told her.
"I know people die. People die in front of us every day, but I believe Meredith will survive this. I believe... I believe in the good." The blond spoke up. A few moments after, Helena zoned out, still deep in her thoughts.
Meredith was her person. And, now, she might be dying.
——
Word count: 2461
AN:
Hi there, happy 2021! Anyway, hope you enjoyed this chapter, even if it was a sadder one.