- Nothing's gonna hurt you baby.
Nothing's gonna take you from my side. -
Hoseok is being a little bitch and it makes me want to cry.
It's been a few days since the Halloween party, and I keep texting and calling him to find myself hitting a wall every time. He's ignoring me, which is really not his style and hurts more than I even thought possible.
Why is he even being like this? We did nothing wrong! Yeah, okay, maybe we almost crossed a line that night, but we didn't! I don't think I deserve to be punished for something like this...
We haven't been an official couple for very long; a few months only, and I feel like our relationship is quite fragile. Him ignoring me like this suddenly makes me doubt everything else and the feeling is not pleasant at all. I love him, I really do, but I still feel insecure about us sometimes and this lack of communication makes me realize that we aren't as solid as I thought we were.
I reread the last few texts I sent him, one in the morning and one at night, and dread creeps under my skin, poisoning my good mood.
Sage: I hope you're doing alright. I miss you.
Sage: Why aren't you answering! Please, let's just talk and we can figure this out.
The fact that I'm home alone on a Saturday night makes it worse. My father is at his casket convention and the house feels too empty without his presence. Usually, I would invite my boyfriend to watch movies and we would stay up and both fall asleep in front of the TV, but to do that, he would need to actually talk to me.
I'm quite annoyed that we're missing an occasion to be alone together, but I can't make him talk to me, so in the meantime I'm stuck in my big empty house doing nothing at all. At the moment, I'm curled up on the living room sofa watching the 1989 version of Pet Cemetery. The main character looks completely bored by his horror-filled life and even the jump scares barely make me flinch as I keep staring at my phone.
Crystal and Paris might be sleeping because it's already close to 11pm and they're not answering anymore. I'm about to close the TV and call it a night when my phone suddenly buzzes. I almost drop it on the floor in my excitement to see who texted me and wish with all my heart Hoseok is finally ready to talk.
My heart jumps when I see Taehyung's name.
Taehyung: Are you still awake?
Sage: Yes
Taehyung: Me and the boys decided to start a bonfire at the quarry. You should come
Sage: Right now?
Taehyung: Yes
It only takes me a second to decide.
Sage: Sure!
It takes me a moment to get ready. I decide to keep my sweatpants and pyjama top on, adding a wool sweater, my hoodie, and my raincoat on top. It's freezing at night at this time of the year, and even though I'm going to a bonfire, to actually get there I have to walk almost fifteen minutes in the cold.
I grab my keys and a bag of chips, heading to the entrance. I plug my earphones in my ears, blasting some Tame Impala and run into the street. I was right; it's freezing outside, my breath fogging as it comes out of my mouth in little steam puffs. It's also quite windy, enough to make me regret I didn't bring something to tie my hair.
I like the empty streets at night, so calm and desolate it feels like I'm the only one alive, ruling the obscurity while everybody is asleep. I'm not a big fan of running, but tonight, with the cold wind and the fast beat in my ears, I find myself jogging to the academy, fast enough to reach the main street after only a few minutes. Even there, the road is deserted, and I cross on the red light after looking left and right.
Soon enough, I arrive at school, following the cemetery path to reach the back of the building. That's when I turn left into the forest, marching in the path along the quarry fence. Lucky for me, I have a good memory, and I remember where the opening in the fence is, behind the wide trunk of a tree.
That's when things get more complicated. I suddenly find myself in front of the gigantic crater that is the stone pit, bare and empty. The piles of rocks gleam under the moonlight and I have absolutely no idea where Taehyung is. I try to listen, narrowing my eyes and looking for any sign of life, but I see absolutely nothing, the place looking as abandoned as it should.
I could always text him again and ask where they are, but the challenge seems fun and without thinking about it, I go down the pit, running at full speed and using the momentum to climb up the next pile of rocks. It's something to do it during the day, but it feels so much fun where you have absolutely no way of seeing where you're going. Fortunately, I remember my steps from the last time I was here and easily climb up the other side. Again, I strain my ears, waiting for a sign of life.
Suddenly, carried by the wind, I hear Jimin's laugh, coming from my left. Going down again to climb the next pile, then jumping to the stone peaks in that direction, I soon find myself overlooking their bonfire.
The four of them have a nice set-up and are chatting carelessly. It shows it's not the first time they're organizing that kind of evening because they're sitting on camping folding chairs and have a pile of logs with them, stuff they probably brought from home.
Deciding to play a prank on them, I take my cellphone out of my pocket and use the flashlight to blind them.
"Hands up! This is the police!" I scream.
"Holy fucking shit!" Jimin cries and falls off his chair.
I can't stop laughing as I go down the pile of stones and the four of them glare at me.
"That was not funny," says Jimin while Yoongi and Taehyung chuckle.
Jungkook, as usual, didn't even react and simply shakes his head in disapproval.
"And the police never say, 'this is the police' when they arrest someone, your impersonation isn't even accurate," whines Jimin, climbing back on his chair.
"How do you know?" I ask, "Did you get arrested before?"
"Maybe," he says, smirking.
"Come on, grab a chair," Taehyung tells me, showing me a pile of old folded camping chairs in a corner.
I join them around the fire and throw the bag of chips on Taehyung's knees.
"Are those really lime and pepper?" asks Yoongi, stealing the bag from Taehyung, "Okay, she brought food, she can stay."
"Do you want a drink? We got beers," adds Taehyung and I shake my head.
"I don't like beer."
Too bitter for me.
"That's cute," says Jungkook.
"Hey, play nice, she's Taehyung's friend now," says Yoongi, emphasizing the 'friend' part and then chuckles.
I look towards Taehyung. He's staring at the fire with a blank expression, hands buried in his pockets and the red light of the flames dances on his face. He must have told them about our previous conversation and the fact that I was coming tonight as they don't seem surprised to see me.
"So, what was I saying before I got so brutally interrupted?" asks Jimin.
"You were telling us about the time your dad's truck got stolen by your brother's friend, what was his name again?" replies Jungkook.
"Fucking Jin!" Jimin exclaims.
"Yeah, right!"
I listen to Jimin's tale, which is quite long and intricate with lots of twists. I get cold and get closer to the fire, putting my feet on the hot stones circling the flames and burying my hands in my pockets. This camping chair suddenly feels like the most comfortable place on Earth and I feel so good, I could stay like this forever.
I don't know what makes this moment so fucking amazing, but I just love every second of it. I love that we're in the middle of the quarry, surrounded by piles of rocks and it feels like we're in a totally other world, on the moon maybe or in a post-apocalyptic setting. I love the smell of the smoke, the crispness of the air which contrasts with the heat of the fire. I love how the flames dance, almost hypnotizing as they lick over the logs and the heat creeping up my body, making me feel all toasty.
Jimin is there, beer in hand and narrating his story while we all listen. Taehyung removed his shoes and is huddled on his chair, hood covering his head as the red gleam of the coals reflect in his impenetrable orbs. Yoongi is noisily eating all of my chips and Jungkook yawns, looking rather small in his gigantic hoodie.
"Wait, your brother stayed friend with that dirtbag even after he stole from him?" interrupts Taehyung.
"Yeah! I mean... it's Namjoon we're talking about, he does a lot of fucked up things without any apparent good reason."
Yoongi chuckles.
"Wait," I interrupt, "Jin, I know that name!"
There is a sudden silence around the campfire as they all turn to peer at me, like I said something wrong, and that's when I realize my mistake.
"Isn't he the guy who..." I start.
"Got us in a whole lot of shit for no reason at all? Yeah, that's the same guy. Him and my brother were close friends even back then," Jimin explains.
Jin
Namjoon
I take a deep breath, suddenly feeling uncomfortable. These two boys were there, the day of the train tracks incident. This whole episode feels kind of fuzzy in my mind and I can't recall some details, but I remember them messing things up big time. They made something that was horrible into a version of the apocalypse, so fucked up all of us were hurt badly in the aftermath while they came out of it completely unscathed.
"I wish they could pay," I tell the others, "They deserve to pay for what they did."
All of them turn to me, blinking. There is a silence while they all realize what I'm talking about.
"Is she talking about the dead kid thing?"
I nod.
"Wait, you're on our side in this story?" asks Jungkook, frowning.
"Of course! I know they were lying! I always knew!"
I turn to Taehyung who looks kind of shocked by this revelation.
"Really?" he asks.
"Yes!"
"Then why didn't you say anything back then!"
I take a deep breath. This is still, to this day, a very sensible question I ask myself at night when I can't sleep, turning in my bed and wondering why the hell I didn't say anything back then.
"It wouldn't have changed anything," I explain, "It was Namjoon and Jin's word against mine. They were adults and I was a child, I froze, I felt so helpless. I never thought any of you could do something this horrible, but I didn't think trying to tell an adult my point would play in your favor. I was sure they wouldn't even take my testimony seriously."
A long silence follows on their part, the crackling of the fire the only source of noise until Taehyung takes out his cigarettes and lights one in between his lips.
"You're right," he conveys, puffing out a cloud of smoke, "It wouldn't have changed anything. You did the right thing. I'm sorry you got involved into this mess in the first place. That was my fault."
"Don't do that," I tell him, "Don't take the blame. I probably would have found you guys anyway. I'm a magnet for that kind of bad luck."
Yoongi stretches like a cat in his chair, letting out a groan.
"Yeah, seems like you're really stuck with us. What a misfortune!"