(Y/N) was a woman who liked to lay low and play safe. She was in the Joui War after all, and after their defeat- she had to make sure she wouldn't attract any attention.
Thus, after seeing Gintoki's business- which he started all by himself. She decided to make use of her medical knowledge and opened up a small clinic near Gintoki's place.
But little did she know- settling into the small Kabuki District, she met the love of her life.
The first time she had seen him was when there were some Joui Rebels who has snuck into her small clinic, since the Shinsengumi was hot on their tails.
She was not able to do anything but listen to the rebel's every order, she didn't want to attract any attention, after all.
Until the Shinsengumi came bursting through her doors, fighting with the rebels. She was contemplating on whether she should fight them or just sit by and watch, so she did something completely unrelated to the two options. She grabbed all her precious notebooks and journals about medicine. That was- Until Hijikata Toushiro showed up.
He was yelling at the top of his lungs, swinging his sword with all of his might. It was night, when it had happened. And yet, despite the darkness she saw his handsome features as clear as day.
"Oi! What are you doing here?!" Hijikata yells, she feels her body being pulled towards him, and she found herself pressed against Hijikata's chest. Hijikata swiftly cut through the men as he ran back out to guide her to safety.
"Who is she, Vice Chief? Is she with the Joui Rebels?" Yamazaki asks when Hijikata had turned her over to the men clad in black uniform. "No, she's the doctor of this clinic! Get her checked out for any injuries. There are still some rebels left inside!"
"H-How did he know?..." (Y/N) silently questioned herself while Yamazaki took her inside the patrol car. "Then, what's your name miss?" Yamazaki asks her as she nodded and complied with Yamazaki's questions.
After that, her clinic was unfortunately burned down by the Rebels as an attempt to escape from the Shinsengumi. Left with nowhere to go, and all her possessions burned to ashes. Hijikata proposed the idea of hiring her and the Shinsengumi's Doctor and Kondo approved of it.
--
"Zaki-kun, what's wrong?" (Y/N) giggles at Yamazaki who was sprawled on the ground outside of Kondo's office. She was on her way back to the infirmary to fix up the new medicine she had bought.
"(Y/N)-san, Captain Okita's sister came to visit- did you know? Apparently Vice Chief had a thing for Captain Okita's sister!" Yamazaki gushed and she paled at his words.
"Sougo's sister?" (Y/N) asks as Yamazaki nodded and urged for her to take a peek through the small gap they made through the door. (Y/N) peeked in and saw Okita sitting beside a beautiful woman with neat sandy brown locks, she had beautiful features and looked graceful and elegant in every way.
"I see...I can see why Hijikata-san's in love with her, she's so beautiful!" (Y/N) spoke softly, although she felt her heart writhing in pain.
"Then, I have to go sort out some medicine now, Zaki-kun." (Y/N) bid goodbye to Yamazaki and quickly made her way to he Infirmary.
"He had someome he loves. What was I thinking?" (Y/N) frowns, feeling the tears brimming her eyes, she slid down the door and placed both her hands on her chest.
"Why does it hurt this much?" (Y/N) furrows her eyebrows at herself. Why was she even falling in love with someone who couldn't reciprocate her feelings? Was she even worthy of loving? Is this how love felt?
"If he's happy....then I'll do everything to protect his happiness." She clenched her fist as she stood up, a determined look flashed in her eyes. Pushing the very thought of love to the very back of her head.
--
"Gintoki! What are you doing here?" (Y/N) bumped into Gintoki, who was sitting on a bench inside the hospital. "(Y/N)? Why are you here?" He asks, his eyes had dark circles under them- a sign that he stayed up all night.
"Well- I came for some medicine samples, the doctors here are always asking for my opinions on some cases. I am knowledgeable about medicine." She winked at him, taking a seat beside him.
"That's great then. Better if you find a cure for her." Gintoki sighs, pointing to the small window of the room in front of them.
(Y/N) squinted her eyes to see the patient's name and read 'Okita Mitsuba'
"Okita? Sougo's sister? Why is she in here?" She asks when Gintoki yawned and stretched his arms. "Apparently she's always had weak lungs, I hear she had a lung disease. She collapsed after she saw Hijikata yesterday, so I took her here." Gintoki explained as (Y/N) furrowed her eyebrows.
"What kind of disease?"
--
After (Y/N) got back, she searched all her journals for information and data about Okita Mitsuba's disease. She swore to protect Hijikata's happiness so she decided it would be the least she could do.
(Y/N) spent countless nights, researching and collecting all data she needed. She even asked advices form the doctors where Mitsuba was confined in and eventually- she found a cure.
"I-I found it!!" (Y/N) yells as she ran to the doctor's office, holding papers in her hands.
"I found a cure! Well, it might not be a cure but-! If she has a regular intake of this in her prescription, her disease toll on her life may lessen and eventually disappear!"
(Y/N) handed the paper over to Mitsuba's appointed doctor who immediately studied the paper.
"This- this might just work! (Y/N)-san, you're a genius!" He beamed as he made a run for Mitsuba's room. "T-That's great...." (Y/N) smiled softly as she started walking away.
On the way back, she spotted Hijikata at the river ledge, after pondering for a while, she finally sat beside him.
"What are you thinking about, Hijikata-san?" She asks softly.
Hijikata didn't respond for a while, but then he let out a small groan. He looked deep in thought, as if he was making a life or death decision.
"(Y/N)...Do you have any regrets?" He asked her. (Y/N) was taken aback by the sudden question, but she immediately knew what it was about.
She smiled softly, connecting her hands in front of her she looked down.
"I do," She confessed, "I have a lot of regrets in my life. But soon enough, I realized that it was never too late to correct the things I've been regretting about. There may be some decisions that I can't take back but...there are always things you can do to make up for it." She closed her eyes.
"That's why- you should live your life with no regrets, Hijikata-san." (Y/N) smiles at him, Hijikata seemed stunned by her words as he didn't speak.
"Even if there is something that you regret, if you still have a chance to correct that- you should take it."
"What if....I don't deserve a second chance?" He asks again. (Y/N) paused and frowned at his words.
"Everyone deserves a second chance, no one is perfect, Hijikata-san."
"No matter what you've done wrong, the only thing you can do is to take responsibility and confront it head on. Running away from it- because you're scared will solve nothing. You'll only end up with more regrets." She says, and then she looked up.
"I love you..." (Y/N) spoke softly, Hijikata's head snapped up," Wha-"
"Those words are my only regret. Because I wasn't able to say them, I didn't have the courage to. That's why- Hijikata-san! You should say the words you want while you can." She met Hijikata's wide icy blue orbs, and Hijikata swore he saw her eyes were glistening with tears.
"Also, I wanted to say that I'm gonna quit the Shinsengumi." She smiles lowly as Hijikata furrowed his eyebrows at her words.
"What? Why?"
"I realized that I want to learn more. The medical field is huge and wide, there are things I don't know yet. So I decided that I want to expand my knowledge." (Y/N) says and then she stood up.
"I have to get back now, Hijikata-san." She says and she scurries off leaving Hijikata alone.
Only a few meters away- and her tears spilled out. (Y/N) let the tears trail down her cheeks as she walked the path towards the Shinsengumi. Suddenly she bumped into a man.
"S-Sorry..." She sniffed and looked up to see Gintoki with a bored look.
"Honestly, what were you doing crying and bumping into people?" He groans as he placed his large hand on her head. "I-I wasn't crying! I was sweating through my eyes!"
"Yeah, sweat all you want. But you'll always be a bad liar."
"G-Gintoki?..."
"Come on, I need a drinking buddy for the night. Are you free?" He looked away, not meeting her eyes.
"As long as it's your treat, I'm free!" She forced a smile as Gintoki sighs and he smiled softly, looking down at her.
"Alright, fine. It's my treat."