Mari's POV
He is mad. That's one thing I fucking realized the moment he went out of the restroom and didn't bother looking in my direction. I was talking with my Dad over the phone but I was too distracted by the fact that Z just went out without waiting for me or even giving me the slightest idea where he was going. He doesn't normally act like that. I mean, yes - he acts like that, but not to me.
I am his best friend! Z always gave in to whatever I want. That's how it has always been.
Even when we all went out to visit some places near the villas, he didn't walk with me. Though I was positive that he was still making an effort to check on me from time to time, this is still wasn't what I am used to.
The whole afternoon went by with us not talking. He made sure to keep a considerable distance, and Shiela - asking me to help her from time to time isn't making it easier for me either.
So when the night came and he decided to say and talk with the boys he wasn't even close with, that made me really sad. With a heavy heart, I sneaked in a bottle of beer with me and headed straight to my room.
A long sigh escaped my lips.
What should I do? I am not used to Z being like this to me and it's bothering me so much. The whole two hours, my mind was filled with thoughts of him as I continuously drink my beer. At some point, I even went outside to get another bottle.
In desperation, I reached for my phone and dialed Zamara's number. After three rings, I was startled when I heard someone else answering Zammy's phone. And it's definitely not Ash.
"Yow, Gold," my eyes closed as I heard Y's annoying voice. Even though I can't see his ugly face, I know he is smirking. I'm not even sure I am thankful I'm not seeing him.
"Please spare my ears from your annoying voice and get Zammy for me," I hissed. His laughter rang through my ears, I tried my very best to stop myself from dropping the call.
"She's in the pool. Ash is teaching her how to swim. God knows why they were even bothering. It's been almost twenty years and all Zammy can do is ten percent bubbling while the rest is just her clinging to Ash like a giant squid,"
I tried to stop myself from laughing but I wasn't successful. I can clearly picture what Y stated because it was actually true. Those swimming lessons that they have have been going on for years and anybody can tell that water isn't really Zammy's best friend.
"Just call her coz I need to tell her something,"
"Rude," he snickered before I heard him scream at the top of his lungs and, almost curse when I heard what he said.
"Hey, Yoon Ji! Goldilocks wants to talk to you!!!"
After a good old two minutes of everybody screaming and a few occasional cursing, Y went back to the phone and chuckled.
"Okay Mari, the princess told me to relay your message to her. Now, control your demons and tell me something juicy. I need that as a payment for all the cursing I received from Zam,"
My lips puckered at his words. I debated whether to tell him it's nothing or ask for his help. I don't really know.
But I was damn desperate I don't even care if Z is his twin.
"Okay, lemme rephrase. What did you do this time Marigold?" he asked. His voice turned a little serious, somehow, the idea that Z actually called him came into mind.
I grunted. Puffing air out of my lips, I lay flat on my bed and stared at the white ceiling.
"Z is mad at me. He's not even with me now! I mean, since when was he friendly with other people? He's outside drinking with the others!" I whisper-shouted. I kicked the blanket off of my feet and was about to go full tantrums when I remember I was actually talking with Y.
Soft chuckles greeted my ears and it's starting to be really annoying.
"Did my twin finally got fed up with the great Goldilocks?" he teased and that made me snap. I am just too annoyed to deal with his bullshits.
"You know what? Fuck you!" I hissed.
"My brother wouldn't be so delighted to hear that though,"
"Ughhhh!" By this time, I wanted to pull every strand of my hair in annoyance. I hate Y! His laughter echoed from the other line and that moron is surely enjoying my misery.
"I was joking, Mari. Okay, Z isn't the type to easily get mad, especially not to you. Now, what did you actually did or said before everything went downhill?"
I stared at the ceiling and pondered on the words I said earlier.
Was that enough reason for him to get mad though? I mean, I know he doesn't like it when we meddle on his relationship but I was just answering my friend!
So I told him about it but Y just laughed at my words. This annoying rat!
I rolled my eyes as if I can see his face. Damn, I'd die to smack him straight in the face, oh God.
"You know what, I should have called Dimitri instead. Maybe that kid can actually listen to everything I have to say!" I scoffed, trying my best not to cuss him even more.
After his failed attempts into stopping himself from laughing, he had finally get a grip of himself.
"Before you drop this call though, which I know you're ten seconds into doing it, lemme just ask you something and I want you to really think about it, okay?"
I roll my eyes at his words. I don't even think what he is about to say is anything serious.
"What is it?"
"Can you deal with it? I mean, seeing my twin with another girl?" he started and for some reason, I felt my stomach churning at his words.
Can I?
I've always asked Z to introduce me to his girlfriend but there are times in which I am actually glad he doesn't. I am just so afraid but I don't exactly know the reason.
And now Y asking me the very same question I have been avoiding for so long makes me really wonder now.
"Maybe you're not getting the idea but let me show the picture to you," He was speaking as if he was very sure about something and it's making me afraid.
"Marigold, once Z decides to really date, there's this ninety percent chance that you can no longer ransack his closet..." he started. Just that specific thought gets me.
"You can no longer wear his clothes because no girlfriend would want to see another woman wearing his guy's shirt, not even a childhood friend. Additionally, you can't expect me or Xander to take our exams in one go so we can travel six hours to fetch you. We're not as clever as Z, sweetie."
Shit. He's right. Z normally fetches me especially when I don't feel like driving.
"And more importantly,"
Fuck, there's more?
"You can no longer cuddle with my brother. You can't call him whenever you want. All of those, the things you're used to doing with him, all of those will just be a memory of the things the both of you used to share... In the end, you won't be as special as you are to him. You'll be just one of his friends..."
My body slowly shifted it's weight until I decided to just sit on my bed. Every word he uttered kept on sinking inside my chest like a damn metal. And it's piercing my heart.
Fuck.
I haven't actually thought of that. No, I refuse to acknowledge that fact.
I heard Y sigh from the other line and for the first time, he seemed to be serious. "Mari, one day, either of you will find someone, someone you guys can't live without. Because it's natural and it is what's suppose to happen,"
My lips quiver at his words and I felt my inside feeling heavier by the second. Suddenly, my heart feels like it's being enveloped with so much sadness and I just wanted to curve into a ball and cry under my sheets.
Will I lose Z? My free hand clutches on my blanket and I have this strong urge to break it and shred it into pieces.
I can't lose him. He's very special to me. He's my best friend.
Why? Why am I this sad?
"Mari?"
My thoughts were suddenly filled with images of Z sitting and chatting with someone else. He would be on the driver seat while I sat at the backseat of the car because his girlfriend was sitting shotgun.
Just the thought of it made me whimper in so much sadness.
"Marigold, are you fucking crying? Oh, shit!"
Before I even realize, I was already crying over the phone, my right hand reached for my cheeks and started wiping off the tears.
Ge'ez, why am I crying? Am I drunk?
"Gold, oh God, Z will kill me," He was trying to calm me down but the idea just keeps on appearing inside my head and it won't stop.
I can't do it. No.
"Heron," I called for Y's name, still sniffling a tear.
"I can't let Z go," I whispered, my voice even cracking at the end. Saying those words made me wanna cry even more. I can't see Z with some other girl beside me.
"But Mari, you can't do that to Z. You can't cage him with you because that'll be so wrong and unfair for him. You can't stop Z from finding a woman for himself,"
Hearing those words was almost a slap to my face. I know. But I refuse to accept that fact!
"No! He can't leave me!" I closed my eyes and started crying again. I don't want Z to have someone else. He can't have a girlfriend and now I am sure about that. I won't allow it. I don't like him to be with someone else but me!
Y laughed once again but this time, it seems like he was amused with something.
"Why can't he leave you? You're not his girlfriend. And you don't love him," he stated as if he was so sure about it. "You only love Z your best friend, right?" he asked and my lips parted.
It was as if I was in a daze and I can no longer think straight. His words kept ringing in my ears and I was starting to think that talking to Y is not a good idea.
"Take a rest, Mari. I'm sure Z will be fine tomorrow,"
I didn't even respond when he bid his goodbye. I just sat there in my bed, confused, unsure of what I am supposed to do.
Putting down my phone, my chest started to rise and fall as my breathing started to be uneven. Was it because of the beers? I only had two bottles.
Closing my eyes, I tried to calm myself but the more I try to tell myself that Z won't leave me, more scenarios kept on appearing and it's driving me crazy. That made me cry even louder.
Before I even realize what I was doing, I was already dashing outside. Not even minding how cold the ground was, I run barefoot to go to see.
And when I reached them, I saw him. I saw him talking with Shiela at the side of the pool. Shiela was smiling at him, that kind of smile a girl shows to someone thy like. And it hits me, I'm not ready. Call me selfish but I'm not ready to let go of my best friend.
Why? Why is he talking to her? Z doesn't normally talk with girls. Does he like her?
That thought made a new set of fresh tears go stream like a faulty faucet on my cheeks. My chest tightens as I find it hard to breathe.
"Dev?" I whispered, my voice low and I wasn't even sure anyone heard me because I barely even heard myself. But he did.
Z did. He heard me because it wasn't even two seconds when he turned his attention to me.
His eyes focused on my reflection and his eyes widened the moment he saw my face filled with tears.
I opened my arms and he understood.
I didn't have to talk. Z left the girl he was speaking with and made a dash to where I am. And I didn't wait for him, I ran to him and crashed my face on his chest, my arms wrapping around his waist almost immediately.
"Hey, what's wrong?" He whispered, his voice soft and it sounded soothing to my ears. Hearing him finally talk to me made me cry louder. I felt his brush my back with his hands.
"Sorry, Z. I won't do it again," I whispered. He pulled away from me a little and lifted his hands to cup my face.
"Do what, Mari?"
My lips quivered and I felt my cheeks getting damp with fresh tears. "I won't share you. You're mine. I won't let another girl get close to you Z,"
I didn't even check his reaction and buried my face back on his chest. I don't care if Shiela heard everything I said. I can live without them but I can't live without Z. This is selfish, I know but Z is mine and I am not ready to share him with someone else. With that in thought, I pulled him even tighter, afraid to let him go.
I felt his arms around me once again and that made me close my eyes. The warm feeling coming from him calms me down a little.
"Baby, let's get you out of here. you're freezing," he whispered. Suddenly, I felt my body being lifted from the ground, my arms automatically reaching to his neck. I buried my face at the crook of his neck, afraid he'd let go.
I didn't know why I was still crying despite Z's attempt to calming me down. He was whispering sweet words over my ears but I was too lost to my own emotions.
My eyes were still closed so when he slowly put me down, I clung to him even more, afraid he'd suddenly leave.
"Baby, we're just going to get you clean up, okay?"
That's when I realized that we are already inside of the restroom. Still reluctant, I slowly released my hands on his neck and he put me down on the bathroom sink.
My eyes met his and saw how deep his stares are. I sniffed a little and his hands reach for my cheeks, slowly brushing the tears on them.
"Take a quick shower so we can sleep after, hmmm?" he cooed. He pulled me closer and kissed the top of my head. When he pulled away, I stared at him and asked, "You won't leave me, right?"
I was holding my breath after. What if he says he will? What if he says he doesn't want to be with me anymore?
Z crouched down a little to level his face to mine. He was staring at me straight in the eyes and my heart started racing like a damn horse.
"Never, baby. Besides, Uncle Kook will kill me if I leave you after I do this," In a flash, I watch as his face slowly went closer to mine. The moment our lips touched, my mind went blank.
I was in a beautiful daze as I felt his lips slowly move over mine. Perhaps, it was his sweet scent that made my brain stop functioning, or was it the sweet taste coming from his kisses?
Before I can even stop myself, I found myself following the movements of his lips as I respond to his hungry kiss. He tastes so sweet, so delicious I wasn't able to stop myself from biting his lower lip earning a low growl coming of him.
So sweet... I didn't know kissing like this can make someone go crazy.
Because I'm slowly losing my mind.
I felt him reach for my hands as he guided them to wrap on his waist before reaching for the back of my head so he can deepen the kiss, shoving his tongue on my mouth. A soft mon escaped my lips.
"Z" I whispered. I was drowning. I felt my heart beating wildly and it's like whole damn reptiles were going frenzy inside my stomach. I let out another moan as I felt his tongue meeting mine.
Damn. I was catching my breath but I don't want him to stop.
I don't want to stop. Wtf.