I wanna be remembered as the girl who always smiled. The one who could always brighten your day. Even if she couldn't brighten her own.
Chapter Sixteen- No Secrets Are Safe
A date after every date. I feel the happiest when i'm with Trent. He's like a drug that persuades me to get addicted.
I never felt like this before. Why?
I first saw the young and carefree Trent after so many years during our first date three weeks ago.
I want to see him beam like that all the time. It makes my inner self jump into happiness.
And his lemony scent, that was the most intoxicating smell to me.
I never want to stop. But I have to. It's getting harder each day.
Yes, it's been three weeks since I started going out with Trent. We're sometimes at the mall, movies, gym, carnival and some other places. Every single date I had with him was precious. But somehow I feel so mean. To have a little space, I stopped from texting him since yesterday.
He knows me as Therese. Not as the real me and it hits directly into my heart. It's like i'm doing an inappropriate action. Everything's so complicated.
Last time, he asked for my surname and I said it was Anderson. Yeah, I used Faith's surname to lie. He searched my name on Facebook. He said there's no sign of any account with my name and picture. I said i'm not in to Facebook and he believed. He trusts me even he barely knows me as Therese.
I need to stop this every faking thing. Dan texts me but I seldom reply. I can't get attached to them. But it's too late because of my strange feelings towards Trent. I don't know what it is but maybe i'll figure it out.
I know I want to do vengeance but my guilt is eating me.
They've been so rude with me during my dreadful past. But now that i'm being rude to them silently, I feel so bad.
I need to tell them the truth as soon as possible.
But how?
I need peace of mind to think. That's why I decided to go to the Music House.
I walked upstairs and sat on the piano seat and started playing my favorite piece that Trent taught me. This is my way to relax my mind. Playing this piece makes me remember all the good and bad things between us which brought me into tears.
I closed my eyes as I play. The music was soothing yet striking. I never imagined that everything could happen this fast.
After hitting the last piano chords, I placed my hands down on my lap while crying.
"I can't take to say another lie to him anymore..." I sobbed saying it to myself.
"Rachelle." I heard a voice from behind. It was him. He pulled my right hand and looked my balled fist. He saw my small mole. The same mole I showed to mom and dad for them to recognize me.
If you're wondering why he never saw that whenever he's with me, i'm covering it with a ring all the time.
My head turned down. I tried to look at him from under my lashes. His face darkened.
"How can you do this to me?" His voice... It's wrapped with sadness and pain. "I trusted you... With everything... My secrets, my deep thoughts about when my sister left... Even my heart!" He's mad at me. So damn mad.
"I-i-i'm sorry." I'm stuttering in fear. My heart was beating ten times faster.
"I believed everything you said. Every fucking lie you told me! Damn it Rachelle! You fooled me! Are you happy now?!" This time I pulled my courage to speak.
"You know I suffered... For two damn years I am bullied and humiliated by your so called friends but you didn't do anything about it! You even jammed in with their deafening laughter! Now, you're asking me if i'm happy? Do I look happy? Damn it Trent! No I am not happy with what the hell is happening. Actually, I should be. But no! I kept asking myself on why does doing revenge to those people who hurt me doesn't feel right. Specially to you.." Every piece of me is broken. I want the ground to swallow me at the very moment.
"Why did you do have to do it this way? Why Rachelle, why? You made me feel all the strange feelings I never had with any other girl. I don't even know who am I when i'm with you. I used to be a player, everyone knows that. I changed because of what you did. But still, it hurts me. So much..." His voice lowered. He put his hands on his face in ache.
"Everything that happened was never a part of my plan. It all just came. I don't know how and why. I've been trying so hard to tell who really I am to you but I failed in all my attempts. Being another girl in your life made me feel different. I've witnessed you being happy, carefree and young when you are with Therese. If I ever introduced myself as Rachelle from the very start, I know i'll never have the chance to see those." If you only know how does it hurts me too.
I remembered me being mad confronting Kyle. But with Trent, I can never be like that. He is my waterloo, my Kryptonite. I've reached my weakest point.
"This is so wrong... Everything was wrong." With that, he walked away shaking his head in dismay. I tried to stop him.
"Please don't go." I felt his body stiffened with my hug from his back. "I just miss the old you... I'm afraid to loose you." Tears flown down faster from my eyes. But he gained his strength back and shrugged removing my grip on his body.
"I need my own time to think Rach. You made me feel like an idiot fooled easily. I have to go." I let him go. He called me Rach for the first time in three years.
I fell down on my knees shaking my head while my hands are covering my face. Mrs. Lewis came towards me.
"What's the matter?"
I shook my head.
"That piece you played, you reminded me of someone close to Trent."
"That's me." She gasped.
"Rachelle? Honey, is this really you?" She looked at me with amazement. "You are so gorgeous. But why are you crying?"
"It's a long story."
"Sorry to dig in. But I know this has something to do with Trent. I saw him exiting the front door looking upset. You and Trent, the way you look at one another, I can say that you love him and he loves you more than you know."
"He's my used-to-be brother. He can't love me like that."
"But he is not your brother and you know that. What is so wrong for you?"
"I, I don't know. Maybe because it's awkward. I grew up with him."
"It maybe awkward but you can never question love when it comes to you." She sounded like a mother giving an advice. "Think of it Rachelle. Stand up and you may go to the guest room if you need a nap."
"Thanks for offering Mrs. Lewis but I want to go back to my suite." We stood up and I gave her a hug.
"Okay, if that's what you want."
The driver was right on time when I opened the gate. I got in the car and we went back to the hotel.
I wiped my tears with the Kleenex placed in front of my seat. I closed my eyes during the whole drive. Nothing's popping out in my mind.
"Ms. Richardson we're here." I opened my eyes and saw the hotel's front door over the car window.
"Thank you." I entered the hotel's main door and went straight to the elevator and to my room.
I called Ethan.
"Rachy!" He was so happy.
"Hi."
"What's wrong? Are you sick? Did someone hurt you?"
"I don't know what to do Ethan." I began to burst into tears again.
"Tell me what's going on. I'll listen Rachy."
I told him everything that happened since I got here.
"Ethan, what should I do?" I asked him after telling the entire story.
"Do you love him Rachy?" Do I?
"He's my-" He didn't let me finish my sentence.
"But he is not your brother. Don't tell me that as an excuse to say that you love him. I'm asking if you love him not like that, you know what I mean. Answer me." Ethan knows me so well... He's like Faith. No wonder why are they so perfect for each other.
"Even I can't answer the same question to myself Ethan. I'm lost, confused about what am I feeling for him."
"Do you think he loves you?"
"He loved Therese. Not me." It hurts.
"But Rachy, you are Therese!"
"Yes I am. But he didn't know that before. He's mad at me now Ethan." I don't even know if I would still be able to see him again.
"Don't talk to him." Huh?!
"What are you saying?!"
"Rachy. You know he fell for you and he confessed that a while ago though he didn't mouthed it directly. I am a guy. We'll never go out with a girl almost everyday if we don't have any serious feelings for her."
"But he walked away when he knew it's me."
"He's on shock Rachy. You can't blame him." What can I say?
"What if he'll never talk to me again?"
"He will. Trust me. For now, make yourself busy doing random things to get him out of your mind." I wish it's easy.
"I'll try. Bye Ethan. Goodnight. Loveyou." I hang up.
What Ethan said was very hard to do but i'll try.
My eyes closed by itself.
Finally, I have nothing to hide anymore.
Tomorrow is another day.
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A/N: You all waited for this moment. I'm so, so sorry if it's sad and short :'< Please don't hate me for this chapter! :'< I cried writing this.
I love you all and I have to put twists in this story. I hope you understand. :) But don't worry, next chapter is going to be Trent's POV so you'd be able to know his side. So PLEASE give me some votes and comments? :/
Shoutouts to my loving readers: @Blackrose821 @Hey_a202 @HonorStudent @JessicaMariano9 @D_A_R_K_l_O_V_E_R @dancer3205 @JoiceFang :) Thankyou for reading my story... :) You are one of the reasons why I keep on writing this... I love you all :*
*If you want to hear the piano piece, I posted the youtube link on the multimedia pane*
-> @aprilgrace014 is my Twitter <3