chapter playlist ⏯
• just the same - bruno major
• painkiller - ruel
• extraordinary magic - ben rector
———
maybe a week later or something. who cares it's not important
shawn mendes >>>
gemma
come over
me
now?
gemma
sure. the sooner the better
me
gemma
me
as much as i wish i could drop everything at your beck and call, i can't leave now
me
would a couple hours be okay?
gemma
i've got work at two :((
gemma
tonight. ill be done at seven. come over
me
yes ma'am
gemma
okay yay i'm so excited
me
me too
me
even though we just saw each other yesterday
gemma
we barely saw each other because you slept all day
me
i had a late night!!
gemma
whatever. see ya later cutie
me
can't wait xxxx
———
later
Gemma was hovered over her laptop when I got to her apartment. I let myself in (after she yelled "come in!" super loudly) and she didn't even look up at me.
"Hey you," I said, kissing the top of her head from behind the couch.
"Sorry," she said, I assumed for not acknowledging my presence. She turned around and kissed me, then gave me a small smile. "I'm very glad you're here."
I couldn't help but smile, too. "Well, I'm very glad to be here. Homework?"
She groaned. "No. I'm trying to sort some stuff out with Isaac and my agent and it's kind of stressful. Especially after a long day of school and work and dealing with people."
I nodded. I understand work stress. Plus, she has school stress on top of that.
"It can wait, though," she said, closing her laptop.
"You sure?"
She nodded like she was very sure. "Positive. I've been waiting to be with you all day."
"Right back at you," I said, and she grinned, then kissed me again, a little longer this time. I felt myself smiling when we separated.
"Always worth the wait," she told me, making me feel warm inside. I think I would wait a lifetime for her.
I sat next to her on the couch and she immediately pulled me back to her, pressing her lips to mine. Blissful. I've never been so completely enamored of one single person. So captivated and enchanted by. It still baffles me, how I feel about her. Even though I know everything about her, she's still like a puzzle that I haven't figured out yet. A puzzle that's really fun to solve.
"Totally worth the wait," I agreed with a smile after we separated, making her laugh a little.
We didn't say anything for a moment. I just looked at her and she looked at me.
"Sometimes I wish we were just...normal," I said with a sigh.
She tilted her head to the side and frowned. "What do you mean?"
"I mean...I wish we weren't always busy. I wish there were more easy days. Easy days to just be. I want to go to new places with you and see the world with you and try new things, but there's never time. When you have time, I don't, and when I have time, you don't," I said. I heard the negativity in my voice and hated it. I can't help it. It sucks sometimes. And I know—first world problem. The biggest first world problem in the universe. Still. She's my freaking girlfriend and it feels like she gets the least of me, compared to everyone else.
"I know," she said, looking away from me. "It sucks sometimes. I don't know if it will ever slow down—not for a long time, at least. It doesn't really bother me that much, though, to be honest."
"Why not? It bothers me a lot, sometimes. I feel bad for not being able to...I don't know. I just want to give you the world but it feels like I'm too busy giving it to everyone else. I don't want you to feel like an afterthought, you know? You're the first thought; you're my only thought," I told her, making her smile a bit. "Maybe it's stupid, I don't know. I really shouldn't complain, honestly."
"You do give me the world," she assured me. "You don't have to worry about coming up short; you seriously never do. You come up super tall."
I couldn't help but laugh. She's such a nerd.
She grinned at her own joke, then kept talking. "We're good, babe. I'm happy just knowing that I have you. That's truly all I need. You're all I need."
She kissed my cheek, as if to seal the conversation. That's it. We're good, babe.
I guess she's right.
"What do you wanna do, now that I'm here to enhance your life?" I asked her, taking off my jacket and tossing it over the back of a chair.
She smiled a little. "Is that what you're doing here?"
I grinned. "Obviously."
"Hm," she pondered, looking at me sideways. "Well, I mean, I do have a couple ideas."
"Such as?"
I couldn't tell if she was going to say that we should paint her room or something insane like that, or if she was just going to say she wants to make out. She's a wild card sometimes.
The way that she wrapped her arms around my neck made me think the latter, and the way she kissed me softly convinced me of it. I was thankful that she decided on this.
"Are you on board with this?" she asked, pausing to speak and look at me.
"When am I not on board with this?" I asked.
"I don't know. Maybe you're just not in the mood," she said a little defensively. "I wouldn't want to assume that you wanted to make out with me if, in actuality, you're repulsed by me or something."
"I appreciate the concern," I told her, smiling a little. "However, I think that's impossible."
She laughed and kissed me again. Enamored.
That went on for a while, a good, long while, until we decided we were hungry. Obviously, we ordered some food, then turned on some random Tom Cruise movie as we ate it. (Gem's a big Top Gun fan)
"Young Tom Cruise could run me over with his car," she said before taking a bite of her salad.
I looked over at her, the confusion on my face definitely apparent. "What?"
She giggled. "You know...like he's so hot that I would let him do anything to me. He could run me over with his car and I'd still be in love with him."
"He's so hot that you would let him
do anything to you," I repeated. "There are so many things wrong with that statement, Gem."
"Obviously I'm not actually in love him," she said, which she didn't really need to say. "It's just something people say. I wouldn't really let him run me over."
"Well, God, Gem. I hope you wouldn't really let him run you over."
She laughed again. "He's crazy, anyway. Big Scientologist. Plus, he's like fifty-five."
She's got a point.
"Are there more people in this category? Who else would you let run you over?" I asked her, genuinely curious.
"Um..." she thought. "Zac Efron. Any day of the week. Either of the Franco brothers, but preferably Dave." She paused to further ponder. "There's definitely more, but I can't think of any."
I nodded, kind of bummed that she didn't include me. I mean, I'd never run her over with my car, but it'd be nice to know that she thinks I'm good-looking enough to do so.
"Oh, and obviously, you," she added quickly. "But you're on a different level. You could run me over with a monster truck. That's how hot you are."
I felt my face get red. Why do I blush when my own girlfriend gives me literally the worst compliment in the world?
"I would never do that," I told her.
She laughed. "But you could, and I'd still totally love you."
I smiled, then shook my head at the absurdity of this conversation. "That's oddly reassuring, actually."
It was one of those nights. The kind of night that I love more than anything. A night where we just watch a movie and make out and talk and be together. A night where she makes a lot of stupid jokes that I laugh at. A simple night, a night that I always crave more of. It's so easy. There's no uncertainty in this; just us.
The night went on, and miraculously, Gemma didn't fall asleep on me. We paused the movie at one point, then ended up talking about nothing for another hour, leaving the movie on pause for all that time. Her phone rang at 10:36, and she groaned, lifting her body off mine. I grabbed her phone off the coffee table.
"It's Edith," I said, passing it to her, assuming it was about something I didn't care about. Now we're definitely never going to finish this damn movie. Gemma took her phone and answered it.
"Hello?"
"Hey Brad. What's up?"
She was quiet while, I assume, Brad spoke to her on the other end of the phone.
"You're kidding!"
"Brad! That's amazing!...no, yeah, totally. Should I come?"
She didn't give him a chance to answer. "No, I shouldn't come. That's stupid. How's she doing? Can I talk to her?"
I inferred from the dialogue and Gemma's super excited tone of voice that there has been an advancement in Edith's pregnancy. Now that we're talking about it, I do remember Gemma texting me earlier to say Edith was in "early labor." Jeez, how long does it take? She texted me that like, six hours ago.
"Edith. Oh my God. You're in labor," Gemma said, and I inferred that Brad had given the phone to Edith. I thought we already knew she was in labor. "You're a superhero. How is it? Are you in pain? Wow, you're so strong."
She said all of this right in a row, with no time for Edith to respond. I smiled at her eagerness.
"Do you know how long until it's time?" she asked. It's not very fun to listen to other people have conservations over the phone. I want to know what's going on.
"Okay, well, I'll let you get back to contracting," she said. "Um...eating spicy food helps. I mean, I don't know from experience, I've just heard that. I bet yoga or something like that helps."
She listened to Edith's response, then laughed.
"Say the word and I'll be there," she told her. "I'll come when everything has calmed down. Do you want like, real food? I could bring you In-N-Out or Chick-Fil-A or something."
She listened.
"I don't care how late it is. I'll be there," she said, even though I have a hard time believing Gemma will be awake past eleven. "Have fun, don't stress, good luck, you're going to be great, and I love you. You've got this, E."
She listened again.
"I know. I will. Okay. Bye. Love you."
Then she hung up and looked at me with a huge grin.
"Edith's in active labor!" she exclaimed excitedly. So I guess there's different kinds of labor...kinda makes sense.
"I made that connection," I replied, chuckling. "What happens now? Like, how long does it take?"
She shrugged. "I mean, it all depends. She's only at six centimeters, and she has to be at ten. Could be four hours until she actually she's the baby, could be eight."
"Eight hours?" I asked in disbelief. I mean, I knew it was a long process, but I was thinking like, four hours at the most. Eight? Plus the whole "early labor" thing? Women really are superheroes.
Gemma nodded. "I mean, it probably will be less than that, but it could be eight. It could theoretically even be longer, I suppose."
"And you're going to go down there no matter what time it is?" I asked her.
She nodded. "Yeah. Wanna come?"
"I wasn't invited."
"You're my plus one," she said, as if it was obvious.
"You don't get plus ones at the hospital," I told her. "You should just go. I don't want to intrude."
"Okay, we're not going to go the minute the baby is born," she replied, as if that wasn't what she just alluded to. "I was going to wait a little while until after their family got to see them. Then we'll go."
I knew she wouldn't back down, and I actually did want to go. What's not to love? My girlfriend, my girlfriend's best friend, one of my best friends, and their new kid. Sounds like a good time to me.
"Okay. Fine," I said. "Whenever you want to go, we'll go."
She smiled and threw her arms around me, holding onto me tightly. "I love you."
This whole thing must just be making her emotional all around. And she is already a super emotional person.
"I love you, too, Gem," I replied with a chuckle. She pulled back, but kept her eyes on me, almost thoughtfully.
"What?" I asked.
She shook her head. "Nothing."
I didn't press on.
"Okay then. Can we finish this dumb movie, now?" I asked, not wanting to be all emotional with her. It's not my strong-suit.
She nodded, sitting back next to me as I unpaused it. She didn't lean into me like before, so I took some initiative and pulled her into my arms, holding her close to me. Her hair smelled good.
"You know all the right things to do," she murmured without looking up at me.
"Because I know you," I told her. "I know how you hate using your own God-given spine to hold your body up."
"I had a long day and I'm tired," she countered.
"You're always tired."
"I'm just generally fatigued at all times," she replied, as if that was any different than tired. "You can thank the Prozac."
"I thought you were laying off of it for a while," I said, somewhere in between a statement and a question. I know she's been trying to take the anxiety medication less, especially when she has less busy days.
She shrugged. "I still need it, especially on days where I'm not home and I don't see you."
"What do I have to do with it?"
"Well, I think you naturally balance me out," she said, as if it was obvious. "That's the whole reason I'm trying to lay off. When I'm with you, I don't really feel like I need it. But you're not always here."
Makes sense.
She sighed. "I don't think there will ever be a time where I don't have it in my life. As much as I'd like that."
"Gem, lots of people take anxiety medication," I told her, pausing the movie again. We're literally never going to finish this.
She nodded and pushed her glasses up on her nose. "One in ten people, actually."
God, she knows way too much useless information.
"My point is, it's okay to have to take it. It's good if you don't have to depend on it as much anymore, but there's nothing wrong with having to depend on it," I told her. "It's not a bad thing at all."
She sighed again. "I know. I'm fine with having to take it; I really am. I like feeling balanced. I just wish it came naturally, ya know?"
I nodded. I get it; I really do. It is an internal struggle to think about having to take medication to change yourself. To change the way you feel. It modifies her personality, and I can't blame her for feeling as though she isn't good enough. Even though she obviously is.
"I know what you mean, Gem. Everybody wants to change things about themselves," I told her, trying my best to make her feel better. "Like...I wish I was as smart as you."
She rolled her eyes, but then smiled. "Not the same thing, but I see your point. You know, you could be as smart as me, if you really tried."
"No, I couldn't," I said, which was true. People work their whole lives to be as smart as she is without even trying. "And that's okay. Not being perfect is okay, you know."
"I know," she replied. "It's not about being perfect—I know I'll never make it there. It's just about..."
She stopped, then shook her head. "It doesn't matter. I don't want to talk about it anymore. I'm perfectly fine being imperfect."
She smiled at me, as if to convince me that she really was fine. I decided to believe her.
"You're perfect in my eyes, just to let you know," I told her, and she laughed a little, leaning against me again.
"And that's all that matters to me," she murmured.
I had to smile.
———
the next morning
"We slept too late!" Gemma exclaimed. We were in that peaceful, morning haze where we're awake but still just laying in bed, which is one of my favorite things. However, the peace has been disturbed.
"What?" I asked, running my eyes.
She showed me her phone. It was a picture of Edith holding a baby, with Brad laying next to them in the hospital bed. They were both smiling. Huh. I guess they had the baby.
"When did that happen?" I asked, rubbing my eyes.
"Four twenty-two this morning," she replied, sounding defeated. "I can't believe I missed it."
"You said you weren't going to go until after the baby was born, anyway," I said, remembering our conversation last night. "And there's no way in hell that you would have gotten up at four in the morning, for the record."
"I know, I know," she said. "She's probably sleeping. What time is it?"
"I don't know, but you're holding your phone right in your hand."
"Right," she said, then looked at her phone. She's absent-minded when she's flustered."It's already ten forty-five? Really?"
"We should really work on our sleep schedules," I said with a yawn.
"Agreed," she replied, then she fell back down onto the bed, turning so that our noses were almost touching. "I'll text Brad and see what's up, but we probably shouldn't go for a little while. I want to let her rest and see her family."
I nodded. "I think that's wise."
We laid there for a moment or two.
"You didn't even tell me the name. Or if it's a boy or a girl," I said, realizing I had no clue about anything.
"Oh yeah!" she said, sitting up again excitedly. "She's a girl. Gabriella Mae. Isn't that pretty?"
The way she beamed was like it was her kid. I love seeing her excited. "Really pretty."
"Edith's grandmother was named Gabriella, I think. I think that's the inspiration," she said, sounding unsure. "Or maybe Gabriella from High School Musical. One of the two."
I laughed a little at her dumb joke.
"Gabby Mae. That's cute," she said, falling back against the pillow again, hopefully for the last time. "I guess you could call her Bri. Or Ella. Or Brielle. Lots of options."
"I like the full thing," I said. "Gabriella. Rolls off the tongue."
She smiled. "I agree. I like it."
"They chose well."
She murmured in agreement and rested her head on my chest, wrapping an arm around my torso like she was hugging me.
"That's a whole lot of change," she said quietly.
"What?"
"For Edith and Brad. They have a human being to take care of now," she said. "Like...their lives will never be the same at all. This kid is going to take up their entire world for the rest of their lives. That's crazy to me."
"Yeah, me too," I replied. Leave it to Gemma to say some thought-provoking stuff at ten forty-five in the morning. "I guess they're ready for it...but I don't know. I don't really think I want anything in my life to change for a good while."
"What do you mean?"
"I just like the way things are now. I like what I'm doing. I like where I am. I like having you. It's all perfectly fine and I'm perfectly content," I said. "I don't want anything to change, really. It kinda sounds selfish, but it's true."
I mean, don't get me wrong—there are always things I'd want to change. I mean, I certainly don't think my life is perfect, but I think it's as close as I've ever gotten. That's a good feeling.
She nodded, but that didn't really convince me that she agreed, which made me nervous.
"You don't agree," I said, as if it was a fact.
"Yes I do," she replied, a little defensively. "This is the best my life's ever been. Changing isn't always a bad thing, though."
"I know. Depends on the change. Having a kid is major. I guess I don't want any major changes," I better explained.
"I agree. A change as huge as that...I don't want that. I like where we're at," she said. "I think some people get bored with what they have, or they get sick of it, so they have a kid or buy a new car or get a dog, but I'm not bored with you. Not yet, at least."
She smiled at me, then turned around to lay her head on my chest again.
"You don't get sick of your soulmate," I told her with a small smile. I knew I'd get a hard objection to such a statement.
"Soulmates are fake," she told me matter-of-factly, rolling over again to look me in the eyes. "However, if they were real, I would agree. You don't get sick of your soulmate, because you are supposed to be with them forever, and that'd just be a major design flaw."
I laughed a little. "I'm going to get you to believe in soulmates one day. I'm not even sure if I fully believe in them, but I really want you to. I really want you to believe that our souls were made for each other."
"I sort of believe that," she said. "Don't you think God made us to be together?"
"What's the difference between that and a soulmate?" I asked, pointing out her blatant hypocrisy.
"Because...soulmates are like this fate thing. Like it was written in the stars. I don't really believe in zodiac signs or luck or stuff like that," she said. "But for the record, our zodiac signs are super compatible."
I laughed. I don't really think I buy that stuff either. But who am I to say what's real and what's not?
"But that's different than God creating me and creating you and creating a plan for us to be together. It's like...we were made for each other," she said. "I think I believe in that. I'd like to, at least."
I nodded. I don't know if I completely buy that either. Like she said, I'd like for that to be the case. It's a crazy thing to think about. To be made for someone. I mean, I hope we are. Or at least, there's someone out there who was literally made for me. I really hope that person is Gemma, but I guess you never know.
"Maybe not, though," she said, sighing. "That sounds far-fetched, doesn't it? But what do I know about anything? I just don't see how you can justify the world with just science. Like, the earth just happened to exist with all these people who have all these complex personalities and individual traits and deep feelings...how do you explain any of that? How do you even explain love? It just blows my mind, human existence."
I understood perfectly. I know she could go on for hours; she can talk philosophy and make me think of things I've never even thought of before. She speaks in such a captivating way—or maybe I'm the only one who thinks so because I'm her boyfriend—but it makes me really listen, really think. She has a casual eloquence that I adore, and she speaks so purposefully with such passion; she could convince me of anything. Anything she says, I'd believe.
"I was never really good at science," she said. Probably lying. "So I may have missed the section that talked about this. But I just think there's too much evidence of God. Too many everyday miracles and incredible mysteries. There's just too much inexplicable depth to the world. Plus, I think it's nice to have something to believe in."
She spoke with an uncertain certainty, as if she knew she was right but didn't want to make it seem as though she did. She knows she's smarter than me. She knows she's smarter than ninety-five percent of people she encounters in her life. But she talks like she doesn't know that. She tells me about things I've never even heard of, and she tells me like she's been researching them her entire life.
But she'll stop. And she'll look at me and apologize for going off on a tangent, and she'll say that she knows she's boring me to death, even though she's not. Then she'll change the subject to something that I know about. She'll ask me to tell her about music and what it's like living my life and all the things she "doesn't understand." She tries so hard to suppress the
parts of her that don't really match the parts of me; it's a sweet sentiment, because I know she just never wants me to feel left out or left behind or whatever. However, I like the parts of her that aren't exactly the same as me. I like the poetry part of her (she says poetry is like easier songwriting, so it's really more like something we have in common, but I don't really agree. I could write a song but never poetry)
It's unique, and she loves it, and I love the things she loves. And I truly love her crazy intelligence. She could fill a whole car ride by talking about World War One (she has. An hour and a half) and she's even made me a better speaker (you don't know how many grammar mistakes you're making until Gemma Clark points out every single one). I like that she's smart. I love it. It's totally attractive and just makes her a million times more endearing. Plus, it's really nice to have someone on your side who can answer your every question and calculate things really quickly.
"I believe in you, Gemma Clark," I told her with a smile. "That's just about the only thing I'm sure of these days."
She laughed lightly. "Right back at you."
She curled up close to me, pulling the comforter almost over her own head, as if she was hiding or something. I wrapped my arm around her.
"You're right," she said after a couple moments.
"'Bout what?" I asked.
"I don't want anything to change," she replied. "Like, I know that everything's not perfect, but this feels pretty damn close. And I don't want it to change."
My heart skipped a beat. That Gemma Clark is always saying the best things I could ever ask to hear.
I kissed the top of her head. I can't promise her nothing is going to change. I don't know what will change and what won't. I just really hope that her feelings for me never change. I know that I'll feel this way about her for the rest of my life. I hope she feels the same way about me.
"I love you, Clark," I told her. "I can't promise you that nothing will change, but I can promise you that I'm always going to love you. No matter what."
It sounds kind of stupid to say I'll always love her, because I don't know what forever looks like, but I know I will. She could turn out to the be the worst person in the world and we could have the worst breakup known to man, and I know I'd still love her. Even if I hated her, I think I'd still love her like she's mine. I love her too much right now to ever stop.
I don't really think you can take love back. I think you can fall in and out of love, like Jake and Gemma. But I think she still loves him, in a way. That's the thing about loving someone. Once it's there, it's there. There's no taking it back. Maybe that's why it's so hard to say.
She smiled and looked up at me, lifting her head off of her pillow. "I've got a little bit of your heart forever, hm?"
I nodded. "Definitely. Probably more than a little bit."
She placed a quick kiss on my lips, then kissed me again, longer this time. She kissed me like it was urgent. It knocked me right out of my eleven a.m. haze.
"I love you like you have my entire heart," she told me softly with a bright-eyed smile. She kissed me quickly once more before falling back onto her pillow, curling up next to me again like it was nothing.
And I literally prayed to God, right then and there, deciding to subscribe to Gemma's "God made us to be together" belief; I just prayed that this is forever. I asked God to let me always have this girl; I promised to be the person she needs me to be, and I promised to give her the love she deserves.
I asked God to keep our love exactly the same as it is now. Easy, real, and nearly perfect.
———
later that day
"Oh my God."
Brad laid Gabriella in Gemma's arms, and Gemma looked like she was about to cry. I would not be surprised.
I had never seen her hold a baby before. It was almost too much perfection for me to look at. I felt like I didn't deserve it.
"She's perfect," Gem whispered, and I saw a tear fall down her cheek. Nobody else had the angle that I have on her, so I doubt they noticed.
"She really is," I agreed. I was a little in awe, a well.
"I'm so proud of you guys," she said to Brad and Edith. Then she looked at me, like she was trying to say something with her eyes, but she looked back down at Gabriella before I could get a read on her.
"Thanks, Gem," Edith said with a smile. She looked exhausted. She ate all the food we brought her in approximately one minute.
"I already love her so much. I'm going to love her forever, probably. I already know I will," Gemma said, making every chuckle a little. Charming Gemma.
Edith laughed a little. "You know, that kind of brings us to something we wanted to ask you," she said, looking at Brad.
Gemma furrowed her eyebrows and tilted her head to the side a little bit. "What is it?"
"Well," Edith started. Then she looked at Brad again.
"We want you to be Gabriella's godmother," Brad said, a smile forming on his face. He looked just as exhausted as Edith.
Gemma blinked. "Wait, are you joking?"
They both shook their heads. "Of course we're not joking, Gem. You're there for me more than anyone else. We figured you'd be willing to be there for Gabby, too," Edith replied.
"Really?" Gemma asked.
"Really," Edith told her.
Then Gemma beamed, flashing a huge smile. She looked from Gabriella to Edith to Brad to me. I couldn't help but grin, too. Her happiness is contagious. This probably means the world to her, too.
"I'd love to be her godmother," Gemma said, her voice soft as she looked back down at the quiet baby in her arms. "Are you sure, though? I mean, I don't know if I'll be good at it."
"We're sure, Gemma," Edith said, a bit of laughter in her voice. "You'll be great at it, I promise."
Gemma smiled, looking at Gabby like she was her own. It scared me a little, how natural it all looked.
"Thank you," she said, looking at Edith and Brad, but only for a split second. She took a slow, deep breath. "It really means a lot to me."
I could tell she was on the verge of tears. She always bites her lip and takes a big deep breath, and avoids eye contact with people. I didn't want to see her cry. If she cries, I most certainly will, too. Our emotions are directly proportional.
"It means a lot to us, too," Edith said. "You mean a lot to us."
Gemma smiled again, seeming to regain her composure. Then she looked at me.
"Your girlfriend's a godmother," she told me, as if I wasn't present for that conversation.
"Just add it to the list. Another layer to Gemma Clark. Is there anything she can't do?"
She grinned and laughed a little. Then she looked at Edith and Brad.
"Is Ben the godfather?" she asked. Ben is Brad's brother. They're the two closest brothers in the world, so I can only assume the answer is yes.
Edith nodded. "Yeah."
"So if you both die, who gets the kid?" Gemma asked bluntly. I couldn't help but laugh.
"Whoever wants her, I guess," Brad said with a shrug. "However, I'm hoping we won't have to cross that bridge."
"Hey, you never know," she replied. Then she looked at Edith. "How ya feeling, E?"
Edith sighed. "Fine. Just fine. Not my best, if I'm being honest."
"You look amazing," Gemma told her. "I can't even tell you just gave birth."
"Thanks," Edith said with a bit of a laugh. The room had brightened up significantly since Gemma walked in, and everyone could feel it. She's electric.
I simply watched Gemma holding Gabriella while Brad and Edith talked amongst one another.
"I love her," she said softly, not taking her eyes off the baby.
"I can tell," I replied with a smile. "I'm positive she'll love you, too."
She looked up at me, her eyes soft but bright. "I really hope so."
She will. Everybody does.
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edithjonesharrison
edithjonesharrison
gabriella mae harrison
born 10/24 at 4:22 a.m.
7 lbs 6 ounces
beautiful, healthy, & perfect
welcome to the world, my sweet angel
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gemmaclark so in love with her already!!
connormcclain um when can i meet her????
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hey everyone!!! sorry it took so long and isn't that good...i have no excuse besides april & may are SO BUSY. i feel like i can barely take a breath, ya know? things are (sort of) slowing down though, so we'll see. i really want to get back on the Fast Update Train, but it's unlikely. that's why i make them long chapters...maybe they're worth the wait?? idk.
anyway, i hope you're all doing well. personally, the boy i like that i'm pretty sure likes me back won't make a freaking move and it's starting to piss me off but i can't talk to anyone about it because i don't want to admit that i like him especially if he doesn't actually like me and i'm just delusional. he's out of my league, ya know? but he said he was going to ask me to prom (but he didn't, so do i believe him?) this is why i hate having a crush, because it consumes me.
➡️ enough chit chat. what's our jam?
so much has happened since the last time we spoke. james tw's album is awesome!! i've been so obsessed with alt. rock and indie music lately, so that's sort of where my head is at. is anyone else perpetually obsessed with "somebody else" by the 1975? i feel like i've listened to it everyday for the past 3 years lol.
okay that's enough talking, maggie. no one will respond anyway—and that's okay. i respect your silence. please vote though.
xx-maggie