A year being with Jack and I was beginning to realize this might not work. I couldn't really believe I thought this would ever work. Sure in the beginning everything was a good as it could be, but most relationships are good in the beginning.
Jack was becoming bored, what he considered love didn't feel as such to me. I gradually began to realize it as I matured. And let me tell you, I've matured a lot over this last year with the amount of stuff I went through.
Going back to what I said about Jack becoming bored, he had begun to go back to killing at an alarming rate. My control I used to have was fading, Jack hadn't noticed yet, but I knew the moment he did things would get complicated for me. His physical contact with me was rough and dare I say borderline abusive. I knew he was pushing his boundaries, testing to see how much he could get away with before the weird bond between us forced him to stop.
I felt stupid, why did I think having a relationship with a homicidal clown be a great idea. Maybe I was just too caught up in my feelings, after all love was blind. Don't get me wrong, I still loved him, but I was scared of how long it would be till he turned on me. He was so possessive now days, as if he knew my faltering feelings, and anything I did could potentially set him off.
There were days I felt like I was walking on egg shells with him, other days it was back to our old normal. I knew I couldn't keep living like this, I felt like I was suffocating, I wasn't happy with this. Not to mention the overwhelming guilt I had for the families who lost their loved ones due to Jack. Sometimes it got to the point I was physically sick when I watched the news.
Something had to be done.
I stood in the kitchen making something simple and light to eat, now days I couldn't really stomach much. I still cooked cake to satisfy Jack and keep him in a good mood just do I didn't have him staring at me creepily when he was in a bad mood. He did that a lot, it was almost like he was thinking of killing me, and honestly it wouldn't surprise me.
I heard the familiar sound of Jack arriving, I heard his feet thump through the cabin and then I seen him come from the spare room, soaked in blood and a blank and rather chilling look on his face. I had to keep in the gag that threatened to escape me as I looked away from him, the guilt coming on at full force.
"Why won't you look at me?" Jack's dark voice pierced through the tense cabin.
I forced myself to look at him.
"I was thinking." I lied and his face darkened.
"You're lying." He stated and stalked over to me, I took a noticeable step back as he towered over me, a claw ran under my chin lightly, delicately, as if he hadn't just been using those claws to rip people open. He pulled my chin up and made me look up at him.
"You don't love me anymore, do you?" He stated, it wasn't a question and I felt my stomach drop.
"Of course I do Jack I-" He gave me a look that made me shut up.
"You don't look at me the same way, you're eyes used to light up when you seen me, the corner of your mouth would curl up in a smile when you were talking to me. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't laugh at my jokes, you don't run your finger through my hair in bed, and when we go out together you're always 3 steps ahead rather than at my side." My heart clenched painfully at the tone of his voice, I should've known he'd notice my change in behavior with him, he's always been good at spotting things.
"Happy, be honest with me. Do, you, love me?" He questioned and I squared my shoulders and leveled him with a look.
"I do." That wasn't a lie.
But I was scared.
He suddenly roared in rage as he knocked everything that was on the counter in the floor.
"LIAR!!"
I flinched and scrambled away as he began to tear the kitchen appear like a rabid animal, snarling and ripping his claws into anything in his way.
"You're going to leave me aren't you?! You're going to run off and leave me alone!!" He shouted as he knocked all of our silverware into the floor. The plates we owned fell to the floor with a crash and I flinched with each crash. I was on the far side of the room, trembling as I watched Jack expand his rage to the living room. He trashed everything.
I couldn't let him continue to tear the house apart. I steeled my resolve and moved over to him carefully, approaching him like someone would a frightened animal.
"Jack." I said softly and soothingly.
"Please stop." I said gently, he kept going, not hearing me.
"Jack!" I said louder, once again he didn't hear me. I took a deep breath and gently tugged on the hem of his pants, his back was facing me. Before I had time to comprehend what happened Jack spun around and with the swiftness only a killer could possess swiped his claws at me blindly.
I felt a dull tension on my neck and upper chest. I felt the heat of something wet, then I felt my legs give out. I never felt my body hit the floor, instead I was captured in Jack's arms with a look I have never seen on his face.
I began to feel the pain bloom, and I tried to breath but my lungs filled with hot liquid. I panicked as I gurgled something out, causing my blood to shoot. The pain was indescribable as I tried to breath, but my tattered throat just wouldn't let me. I felt a pressure on my neck and i looked to see Jack holding his hand to my throat in a desperate attempt to stop the bleeding.
I could see the panic in his eyes, which surprised me because Jack never showed me any sort of vulnerability, I had thought he was incapable of emotions like panic or fear, there were times I wondered if he was even capable of love. It was a ridiculous thought, i knew he was, he was just so twisted up he expressed it differently. I never learned to properly express himself, the only other person in his life was the one responsible for creating the monster he had become.
I wanted to so desperately show him, to teach him that there is more to the world than just killing. That he didn't have to kill, he could find other things to enjoy. But in the end, what could one highly unlucky and weird human girl expect? I couldn't change him, he was hundreds of years old, there was no way I could even hope to change him.
The blackness was overtaking my vision, Jack faded in and out of my view, i could vaguely hear him saying something as i felt myself being moved, or was i being rocked? I finally gave in and closed my eyes, accepting my fate, not knowing if I would wake up from this like the other times or not.
If not, I wish I had gotten the chance to tell Jack that I did love him, that I was only scared of the way things were going. I was scared of being unhappy. Jack was a monster, he murdered people, but despite so, no matter how much his actions sickened me, how much the guilt ate me alive, Jack would always be my monster. And I really did love him.
And finally, nothingness.
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Well guys its been a great one an-
Oh, whats that? You're not satisfied? But why not? I mean it seems like a great ending to me. I mean with a story like this, how can you get a happy ending? Sooooooooo.
You want more....?
......Are you sure about that?....
Well if you insist........
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I found myself floating in a sea of black, just floating with the current. There was no light, no land, nothing but the darkness and the sensation of floating in water.
I've never experienced this before, when I died it was usually just black without sensations, without awareness, just pain and then I woke up.
So I guess this meant I was dead?
"You are correct about that child"
I felt panic hearing the serene feminine voice, I jolted up, or at least I think I did, I couldn't see anything. No one had ever spoken to me after death before.
"I understand this is frightening, and I'm sure you are curious as to who I am." The voice didn't have much emotion, just the serenity
I looked around, but nothing changed, it was still black and it was mildly terrifying.
"Who I am is not so much as important as what I am. To be specific, I am the one that created Jack." At the mention of Jack the voice got darker and a bit sad.
"Jack was not meant to be as he is, he was meant for so much more, but human vileness tainted him. Twisted him up into something ferocious. Originally I thought to take him back, but what I gave you humans was something pure and because of humanity that purity changed, became corrupted, and so I left him to do as he pleased with humanity. However, as time passed I decided I could not ignore my creations unhappiness and instability any longer. And so I found you, you are my present to my creation for the misfortune he had and apology for giving him to an undeserving human. You have a gift as I'm sure you are aware, I gave those to you because due to you being his gift, you were to have a rather unfortunate life full of strife and bad luck, death would threaten to take you many times and I could not allow that to happen before you had a chance to meet Jack. So I gave you the gift of temporary immortality. " She explained and i felt my head spinning with the information.
I'm his gift? I mean I guess that explains my weird attraction to him and my inability to actually leave him when he did horrible things. Why I continued to love him even though I was terrified of him
"But it seems I have only made things worse, you changed him in some ways, you showed him love and in return he learned to love in his own way, but now you're dead and he's experiencing a pain he's never known. He may be in pain but I can remedy that, but you have to do exactly as I say, if you do not, you will die and behind you will leave an even worse monster that will take even more human lives and do more unspeakable things." The voice paused then continued on to explain what I would do and the consequences of them. I listened with my full attention, my heart racing in my chest.
"Will you do as I say Felice Fiore Grande? Do you accept?"
I took in a deep breath and with my nerves leveled I responded
"I do"
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I gasped for air as I attempted to sit up, but instead my lungs wouldn't expand and I couldn't move. It was dark and I felt an awful pain with each attempt I took at breath. Panic began to set in as i attempted to move, I began to realize I was covered in dirt. I desperately tried to move my arms as survival instinct set in. I began to realize I was clawing at the dirt, I felt a dull pain through them as I kept digging towards the surface.
I desperately tried to get air and I pain shot through my ribcage and the dirt made it to where i couldn't even expand my chest. The more i panicked the more my vision began to swim. I could feel the rough texture of the dirt scratch against my flesh, my eyes burned at dirt got into them, so I kept them firmly shut, but that didn't stop the pain.
There was an agonizing pain that shot through my pointer finger and i realized I tore a finger nail. I kicked my legs as I dragged myself up, the dirt pressing in on me each direction as I felt myself gradually make my way up.
My vision swam even more and I was close to passing out, I didn't have much time till I died again. I had to keep pushing.
One hand pierced through the dirt and I felt the cold air outside. With renewed vigor i began to break through to the surface and finally to my first breath of fresh air as I heaved myself up and onto the ground.
I violent cough tore through me as I coughed up a cloud of dust, which was not at all normal. The pain in my body was excruciating as I laid there heaving. I rolled onto my side as I began to wipe my eyes and then finally open them. Where was I? Turning my head and looking around, I realized I had no clue where i was out, I felt disoriented and couldn't understand what was going on.
I sat up with a sway and attempted to stand only for my legs to collapse out from under me, I tried again, and again, until i was able to wobble on my legs towards a random direction. Robotically my legs began to move as I got the hang of walking again, it was dark out, I could hear the chirping of the crickets, and the hooting of an owl. The cold crisp hair licked against my body as I began to become aware of how cold it was outside and just how much my small body was trembling from it. Despite everything I just kept walking, hoping to find somewhere I recognized so I could get back home.
But where was home? Everything felt fuzzy, I had something to do....What was it?
There was a pounding pain that shot through my skull.
Oh, now i remember.
I wasn't sure how long I walked until I spotted the familiar silhouette of the cabin. I paused when I got into the yard and my eyes widened.
Was this even the same cabin?
The windows were broken, the outside of the cabin was overtaken by weeds and vines, in some areas the wood was falling off the sides. I took a step, then two before walking inside, the door was open, just barely, and I reached forwards and pushed it open.
Inside was even worse, it was a mess of destroyed furniture and scattered stuff, there was a giant blob of black in the middle of the carpet and I realized that was my blood. I looked around and realized two weeks had passed if not more. Someone was still living here though, something in me told me as such.
Exhaustion swept over me along with a piercing thirst. I dragged myself into the destroyed kitchen and to the faucet, just hoping there would be water. The faucet sputter as I turned the knob before a brown liquid came, i waited a few moments for it to clear up before sticking my face under the water and drinking as much as I could handle.
One my thirst was taken care of I went to the bedroom and into the bathroom to take a shower. I relished the feeling of the warm water on my chilled and dirty skin. I grabbed my soap and began to wash off the dirt and began to wash my hair. I winced at the burning sensation on my fingers and brought them to my face to look at them. They were raw, a 4 of my fingers had their nails ripped off painfully.
I didn't have too much time to linger.
So i quickly decided to ignore my fingers and finish up my shower and get dressed. I needed to find Jack. I had until midnight, if i didn't do it by then, I would die and Jack would be free to reek more havoc on humanity.
I had to do this, no matter how much it hurt.
Once clothed, I began to gather the things I needed and shoved them into my hoodie pocket and began to search for Jack. I took in a deep breath and attempted to use that weird connection. It took a few tries before a gold thread leading away from me came into view. I was expecting a chain, but now was not the case. I didn't linger on it too much as i followed the thread that led me into town and into a random neighborhood. I followed it till i was standing on the porch of a random house. Something told me I was too late for these people and I readied myself for whatever laid beyond the door. That is if it was even unlocked.
I grabbed the knob and twisted, and sure enough I was able to open the door. Slowly creeping in, I shut the door behind me and instantly I could smell blood in the air, it was overpowering. The living room was free of blood and bodies, so I continued on.
"Jack?" I called out softly, there was silence, but the heaviness in the air told me he was here.
"Jack, its me." I tried again, before i had time to register what was happening, there was a large form grabbing me up in its arms and spinning me around as a hysterical sound escaped it. I felt something wet hit my skin and soak into my shirt and I clenched my jaw and tried to ignore.
"You left me." Jack was so angry and mournful it was jarring.
I wrapped my arms around him.
"Take me home, we can talk there." As soon as the words left my mouth I found myself back at the cabin with Jack.
I pulled away to stare at Jack, he looked exactly the same, but there was something off about him that made him seem different.
"I'm back now." I said softly as i reached my hand up to cup his cheek, ignoring the blood that was on it.
He leaned down and buried his face in my neck.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to." The tone he held sounded so much like a child it hurt.
"I know caro, I know" I pet his head as I reached into my hood, grabbing a cold handle.
I ran my finger over the blade in my pocket, cutting my finger. I smeared my blood over it as I whispered sweet nothings to Jack. My heart clenched painfully at what i was about to do.
"I love you Jack." I said softly as Jack took a deep intake of air but then paused.
"And I'm sorry too."
Before Jack could register my words or actions I yanked the blade from my hoodie and lodged it into Jack's chest. He gasped as I held his cheek softly with my free hand, tears streaming down my face.
"Mi dispiace, Mi dispiace. I'm sorry" I whispered as I eased him down as he slowly began to lose his ability to stand.
I pulled the blade out and watched with sadness as a white glowing substance soaked into the fabric around his chest, some of it dripping onto the floor and some of it sticking to the blade.
Jack slowly reached down to touch his chest and then brought his hand him, he looked almost fascinated.
"I'm...bleeding." There was awe in his voice, he never bled, but now he was.
He looked back to me but rather than looking at me with betrayal or sadness, he grinned as he wrapped his arms around me and laid his head on my shoulder. He held me like that until he went still, and my sobs pierced throughout the quiet cabin.
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So theres your 'bad(more like sad lmfao ;-;) ending' for those of you that wanted it, the good ending will continue after this message.
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A year later
I carried the heavy box into my new apartment, a grunt escaping me as i struggled. I walked up the steps carefully, mindful not to slip and fall. Once inside i took a deep breath and huffed as I wiped the sweat from my brow. I looked to the other boxes with annoyance as the sound of footsteps got louder and louder as someone came up the stairs. I went to the door that had ease closed and opened it wider as a man walked into the apartment and set the stuff down.
The man set the stuff down with a sigh.
"Thats the last of it." He grinned at me before walking closer and wrapping his arms around me, his grin never leaving his face as he kissed my nose.
"Ugh you need to shave." I pushed his face away when his chin brushed against my nose. His grin changed to a smirk as he held me still as he rubbed his face against mine.
"You love my stubble, it makes me look sexy~" He cackled as I fought against him.
I finally accepted defeat and slumped before staring up at the man. He had longish black hair that was slightly pale, but was gradually getting some color the more he got some sun. He had a slightly long nose that was not by any means unattractive. His face was slender and he had this mischievous look on his face 24/7, as if he had some diabolical plan, which knowing him, he did. He was taller than me by a foot, and his build was slender but was gradually becoming more muscular as time went on. He looked older than me by a good 8 years, but sure as hell didn't act like it.
"Come on Happy, don't look so un-Happy." He bopped my nose with his finger and I gave him a sour look.
"Shut it you clown." He only laughed, it was heart warming and I couldn't help but smile.
I pulled away after pecking his lips and went to the kitchen to make lunch before we tackled unpacking everything.
"So Felice." The man stressed my name teasingly as he leaned against the counter casually.
"So Jack." I stressed by my boyfriend's name.
"Its been one year since we met." He hummed and I kept the grin that was on my face from getting wider.
"Oh yeah?" I questioned as I continued to make our sandwiches.
"That means you need to make me a cake woman." He declared as I faltered for a moment.
It didn't matter how much of his memory was gone, Jack still acted like so much like his old self, but only in positive aspects. Granted he wasn't a 10 foot clown anymore and was a 6 foot something human man now, but that was beside the point.
After i had 'killed' Jack, the angel that was responsible for creating him worked her magic and made him human. That was the plan the whole time, but killing him didn't hurt any less. When Jack finally woke up, I was there for him to help him through his confusion and fright. He had no memory of his past, of the old him. All he knew was who I was and not who he was.
So for the next year i helped him on his feet and during that time, we fell in love again, and this time our relationship was healthy. There wasn't fear, or possessiveness, and I definitely didn't have to worry about human Jack committing murder. It was an adjustment for me, it was hard at times, but eventually we both pushed through it and are very much happy.
Pulling myself from my thoughts I smiled at him, loving how beautiful his baby blue eyes were.
"Do you want chocolate or strawberry cake?"
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Annnnnnd now we're done!!! This is by far the most I've written and i'm pretty happy with how this came out!
So guys its been a great run! I really hope you guys enjoyed my story, even though its shitty since I started this FOUR YEARS ago. WOW I can't believe its been 4 years since I've started this, thats freaking WILD my dudes.
Hell, I've practically grown up with some of you guys at this point, lmfao.
Its been so much fun writing this and I'm so happy I was able to finish this story for you guys! I hope I get to see you in my others stories!
Which by the way, I have a new wattpad account (CodeNameWriter) where I will post my original works on. I currently have 1 story in progress called Demon Girl, I'll give you guys some info on it below:
Description:
What would make you sell your soul? Would you sell it for money? Fame? Recognition?
Or perhaps something entirely different?
What drives a person to sell their soul? It all depends on the person. Greed, desperation, envy, etc.
Would you sell your soul for someone you love?
Because that's what I did
Demon Girl is a story full of excitement a thrill that has plenty of funny, romantic, sad, and touching moments. So if you're looking for a story that has a strong female lead, is LGBT friendly, has strong relationships, diverse characters, AND has supernatural elements and characters along with super heroes, then look no further!
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Teaser:
If you've read this far thank you so much for reading my little self promotion! And once again thank you SO SO SO SO SO SOOOOOOOOO much for reading Laughing Matter, I'm thankful for all of the comments, votes, and wonderful support i received from you guys over the years.
And for the last time on this story......
Have a wonderful day/night!
See you my dudes <3