'Y'know, it's beyond me why you don't just move your bed in here.'
At the sound of Lex's voice, Kennedy looked up from the book she'd been engrossed in. She peered through the wooden slats of the library's balcony and smiled down at him. 'Do you mind me spending so much time in here?'
He smiled back, hands slipping into his pockets. 'Not at all. At least I know where to find you.'
She got to her feet and leaned over the railing so she could see him better. 'I like it in here.'
'No kidding,' he teased, then nodded towards the book in her hand. 'What is it this time?'
'Cyrano de Bergerac.'
'Ah,' he said with a nod. 'Rostand. Good choice. One of my favorites.'
'It's a classic. And classics are meant to be cherished.'
'Especially the rare one that is actually decent,' Lex added.
'Why do you like it so much?'
'The guy had the world's most outsized nose. Much like being permanently bald,' he shrugged. 'So I guess I've always related to Cyrano. He's brilliant, witty, talented and yet he has this insecurity based on that which defines him physically, above all else.'
'So you're two of a kind, huh?'
'Something like that. The part in the play when Cyrano duels with the Viscount after he insults his nose is particularly clever. He invents spontaneous rhyming insults that the Viscount could have used had he of had any brains or creativity. It's utterly disarming. Cyrano wins the duel, both physically and psychologically.'
She smiled and for a moment his eyes held hers. He wondered how it was possible for a girl to be so incredibly captivating. There was nothing and everything between them. Lex was rich, he was powerful; admired by some and feared by others. But looking at Kennedy he felt a kind of power different from any he'd ever known. In that moment, with every part of himself that he knew and parts of himself he hadn't yet figured out, Lex understood what that power was telling him.
He was falling in love with her.
The realisation of the strength of his feelings floored him. He had never before experienced a connection like the one he felt with her, and suddenly he was overcome with wanting to tell her everything he had been feeling from the moment she had walked into his life. So he did. Without thinking he found Cyrano's words to his love Roxanne come to his lips.
'When I look at you, I feel as if I can bring the stars down from the sky.'
Kennedy's breath caught and held in her throat. He stood there, gazing up at her, his hands deep in his pockets, and with a look on his face she'd seen once before. The day he had asked her to dinner. She could hear her heart pounding as his gaze held hers. And his words...where had they come from? Until she realised that they were in fact a line from the play. Feeling a little silly and a lot flustered, she slowly licked her lips and played along. Although she had no idea why. Reciting the next line, she spoke.
'Your words glitter like stars. But are they true?'
'Never until tonight have I spoken to you from my heart. Here in the dark, I feel free to speak the truth, without fear of being mocked.'
'Mocked for what?'
'Feelings. Honesty. The night is a cloak that hides my words.'
'You've no need to hide from me. It is your words I love.'
Lex took a small step forward, his gaze never leaving hers. 'Then let me speak,' he said quietly. 'Before I lose my courage.' The truth, Cyrano's and his own, came from his lips. 'I love you. Only now do I know the meaning of true love. It means I would give up my happiness for the sake of yours, even without your knowledge. And I will love you until the day I die.'
Kennedy swallowed. She knew they were only play-acting, but a person would have to be made of stone not to be moved by such words. Or maybe it was the person reciting them...With her heart racing she drew in a breath. 'How could I have been so blind?' she said quietly. 'It was you who loved me all along.'
The room fell silent. Eyes locked. Neither of them moved.
Then the silence was shattered by the ringing of Lex's cell phone. With a sigh of frustration, he took it from his pocket and answered it.
Kennedy turned away and let go of the long breath that had been building in her chest. Below her he was barking out orders to the person on the phone. He sounded annoyed. Maybe even frustrated at the interruption. She slipped the book back into its place on the shelf. They had been play-acting, she knew that. Yet for one blindingly stupid moment she'd allowed herself to be swept away by it all and had almost wished the words had been his own.
'...any more problems get back to me.' Lex ended the call and pushed the phone back into his pocket. Kennedy was standing with her back to him and he wondered what was going through her mind. But then she made her way down the stairs.
'Kennedy,' he said her name softly. One look into those emerald eyes and he found himself weakening. The way she was looking back at him threw him for a second. He saw something he hadn't seen before. It told him to go along with the moment. It told him he couldn't lose what he never had. 'There's something I want to tell you,' he began.
Panic rose up within Kennedy. 'I...I don't want you to say anything that would complicate things between us.'
He frowned. 'Things will only become complicated if we allow them to,' he said. He took a step towards her. 'Kennedy, I can't keep this to myself any longer. I've tried. Believe me. But I can't do it anymore.'
'Lex...'
'Just let me finish. I never used to believe in fate. I always believed that a person made their own destiny. My father drilled that into me often enough. Until I met you, Kennedy. Serendipity, remember?'
She slowly nodded. 'I remember.' She thought back to the night she had broken into the mansion. When she'd tried to steal his car. A few days...Yet it all seemed like so long ago.
'Luck. Fate. I never believed in any of them. But that's all changed. At the risk of drifting into the mawkish, what I believe in Kennedy, is you. The stars were aligned the day you walked my way. Although, technically, you were sitting the first time I laid eyes on you,' he added with a gentle smile to which he was glad when she smiled back. 'I hardly recognise myself anymore,' he went on. 'For the longest time I've been trying to the point of desperation to find some clarity in my life. And now, it's so unbelievably clear, it's ridiculous.'
She found she couldn't tear her eyes away from his blue gaze. 'Lex, you don't have to tell me this.'
'Yes I do. Kennedy, when you first came here I told you that I didn't want anything from you. I lied. I want everything from you,' he said quite seriously. 'Everything.'
It was too much. She lowered her eyes from the intensity of his gaze, he was looking right into her, as if he already knew all her secrets. 'Things are happening too fast. I can't think straight. I can't - '
'You know as well as I do that there's something happening between us.'
She brought her eyes back up. 'I won't deny that I like you, Lex. But we both know it can't go anywhere.'
'Give me one good reason why we can't give in to this and be together.'
'Because - ' She broke off, faltered. Tried again. 'We're not, we're too different...' She stopped and sighed, shook her head. She knew it was a pathetic reason. But she couldn't think of a genuine one. Apart from her reason for being here in the first place. But then he didn't know anything about that.
'Someone once told me that we're not so different,' he said gently reminding her of the other night.
She ran a hand through her hair and sighed. 'I've never known anyone like you,' she said sounding a little annoyed. 'You have this uncanny knack of making me feel tongue-tied and vulnerable and I don't like it.' It made her frown.
'I guess it kind of knocks your tough-girl image.'
'Don't mock me, Lex.'
'I'm not,' he said, his tone more serious. 'I would never do that to you. Kennedy...your vulnerability is the thing that makes you real to me. Because believe me, since I met you, I've had to pinch myself a good few times. I've woken from a dream and wondered if all this was really happening. If you're really here. If this beautiful girl that only a few days ago hotwired my car and looked at me with loathing and anger in those amazing eyes, is really here or if she's just a figment of my eccentric imagination. You've made me feel in a way that I've never before felt, and as much as it unsettles me, I'm not afraid of it. I want to protect you and I want to be with you, Kennedy. I need you. And I've never needed anyone.'
Their eyes locked again and the words hung in the air between them.
'Lex,' Kennedy whispered. 'I never wanted or even expected this to happen. I didn't think someone like you would be interested in someone like me. You could, can have any girl you want.'
'I want you.'
'Lex...'
'What do you want, Kennedy?' he asked gently. 'Tell me and I'll give it to you.'
'I don't want anything from you. I never did,' she insisted. 'I just, I needed a friend, that's all. But you...you want something I'm not sure I can give you. You want - '
'What I want is for you to come here and kiss me,' he demanded.
Startled she looked at him, heart in her mouth. 'What?'
He sighed at his own abruptness, glanced down at the floor. Then he looked back up at her. Spoke again, this time more softer.
'I want you to kiss me, Kennedy.'
Then softer still.
'Please.'
*
'K-Kiss you?' Kennedy repeated almost weakly.
Lex slowly nodded. 'Yes.'
He was serious. His blue eyes had darkened and the intensity she saw there made her swallow. He was actually being serious. She shook her head. 'I can't...I don't - '
'Then I will,' he said and moved towards her.
Kennedy's heart jumped into her throat, as the panic welled up inside of her. She was frozen to the spot. She couldn't move. He kept coming towards her and she couldn't move. But that wasn't the scary part. She wasn't certain she even wanted to.
'Lex,' her voice wobbled out, 'no...'
He was in front of her now. 'What are you afraid of?' he asked, his voice low.
You. This.
'I could never hurt you, Kennedy,' he murmured. He took one hand from his pocket and reached out to her. She was still frozen. Wanting it and not, both at the same time. Gazing into her eyes he gently brushed his thumb over the curve of her cheek.
At his touch, they both felt it. There was something, some active thing, going on between them and had been for some time now. His caress was gentle and warm and it felt so right. She wanted to close her eyes and press her face into the palm of his hand. But she fought against it because she knew she shouldn't be letting this happen. Why wasn't she doing something to stop it? How was it possible to be afraid of something so bad and yet want it so much?
There was the giddy feeling again. And his mouth was drying up. With his heart scrambling around his chest like a mouse in a cage, Lex slipped his fingers into her thick curls. He had imagined they would feel like this. Soft. Silky. Curving his hand around her neck, he cupped her nape, while tenderly brushing loose strands back from her eyes. His gaze never left hers. He stroked his fingers down the side of her face and cupped her head in both hands. His lips parted slightly as he took a breath, held it. Then slowly he leaned in and just as his lips were about to brush hers, he stopped. He waited to be rebuffed. It never came. He lowered his mouth and kissed her and as soon as their lips touched, there it was again, and just like before, they both felt it.
He felt it so hard and so fast that his legs almost buckled beneath him.
Lex Luthor had kissed many women in his time. But this was something else. Nothing could have prepared him for the feeling that overwhelmed him or for the blatantly sensual, yet tender way she responded to him. Nor for his own mindless response.
Kennedy felt her insides sighing. His fingertips on her skin, his lips on hers, sent a tingle down her spine which spread throughout her entire body and even though she was trembling, she managed to lift her arms, which felt strangely heavy and weak, and slide them up his chest. She could feel his heart racing beneath her palms, and felt herself leaning into him even more as his mouth covered hers again and again. She felt his hands in her hair, shivered as he possessively pulled her harder against him. She was losing herself. It was impossible not to.
Then came the blood rush through her ears, the electricity prickling at her skin; while beads of sweat began to break out all over her body as she fell deeper and deeper into him. This feeling was all so new. She had enjoyed many a kiss before, but they'd never made her feel this way.
Vibrant. Euphoric.
The intensity of her emotions was startling. But as much as she wanted to break the kiss, she couldn't. Didn't want to. It was like being underwater. Water kisses filling her soul. Caught in a tidal wave, where there was no use in fighting, you just had to let it be. She had never been in less control of her emotions. It felt like...
Floating.
And then she realised she knew why. The feelings were the exact ones she had when using her ability. Only much more powerful. Much more primal.
Still kissing Lex and almost afraid to open her eyes, she did just that. Her lids were heavy as if she had just roused from a deep slumber. And that was when she realised, it wasn't her and Lex that were floating...it was everything around them.
The desk, the chair behind the desk, the telephone on the desk, pens and sheets of paper and a book that was lying open, its pages gently fluttering like a birds wings; the brass lamp...they were all hovering in mid-air.
What...the...?
Over the years Kennedy had learned to control her ability. Her emotions. She'd had to, for the fear of hurting someone was always at the forefront of her mind. But this...this was something completely new to her. She had never kissed a man and made things float before. She wondered what it meant. She wondered if she broke the kiss, would that make it stop? And if it didn't, what then?
The taste of her was filling Lex. Warm and drugging. Her scent was part of each breath he inhaled, became a vital element of his very being. He had only wanted a taste. But as soon as he touched her he knew a taste would never be enough. All around him he could sense the shift in the atmosphere, could feel it warm and sultry, rippling against his skin. It was an amazing feeling. Almost like being high on a humid August day. He didn't want it to end. He never wanted it to end. This euphoric feeling.
Kennedy squeezed her eyes tight shut. She needed to break the kiss and not just because the need for oxygen was becoming pressing. Slowly, tentatively, a little unwillingly, she drew apart from him and opened her eyes. Behind him, everything was still hovering, but she was relieved to see that breaking the kiss, dampening her emotions, had indeed broken the spell, as the desk and everything on it slowly began their descent back down to earth.
She could feel Lex's breath in her face, coming in short, static breaths. She watched him take a deep, steadying breath. She gave him a moment, needing one herself. Praying that by the time he opened his eyes everything would once again be normal.
Licking his lips, Lex tasted her there. Sweet, like honey drops. The craving filled him again. She was the only one who could satisfy it. He knew that now. 'Kennedy...'
His voice sounded low and husky. When he opened his eyes he gazed right into hers and even though they were no longer kissing, he could still feel it - the atmospheric shift, almost like a bubble popping. He could feel it against his back, like a sticky shirt on a hot summer's day. His skin was tingling, alive with an almost electrical energy that crackled in the air around him. He didn't know why, but something told him to turn his head, but her hand came up to his face stopping him and as he smiled into her eyes, he instantly forgot all about why.
'Do you feel that?' he said, his voice low.
'Yes,' she said.
'I can't explain it. I've never - '
'Neither have I.' Over his shoulder she could see the desk and everything on it had touched down. And as she smiled back at him, Kennedy knew why it had happened. As she looked into his eyes, she understood what it all meant. The feeling - although completely unnerving - overwhelmed her. Consumed her.
Lex wanted to tell her how he had been feeling. He wanted to tell her he had fallen in love with her. He wanted to tell her everything. 'Kennedy - '
She silenced him, pressed her fingertips to his mouth. 'Don't say anything, Lex. Just...just kiss me again.'
It was all Lex needed to hear. He moved into her and as his mouth touched hers, once again everything began to gently...silently...float all around them.
_____________________________________________
COPYRIGHT. © ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. Debra Jay. 2003