Walking among the remains of Shiganshina, Lara got startled when she heard a green flare being fired by Levi atop the Wall. Quickly, she went to Hange, who was also wandering around the city, and together, they joined Mikasa, Jean, and Connie to meet Levi.
When they arrived at the top of the Wall, they saw that Armin had woken up. Next to him, still unconscious, laid Sasha. In a more distant area, Floch studied the surrounding landscape through binoculars. He didn't feel very comfortable around the others, so he always tried to stay a little further away.
Armin looked very puzzled and confused.
Mikasa promptly ran into his arms, crying to see him well and alive. Connie and Jean also went to give their friend a hug. Hange squeezed his shoulders, with a gentle smile, and sat down on top of a sleeping bag. Levi stood beside her while the others also circled Armin.
Lara was the last to greet him.
Slowly, she walked towards Armin, who was sitting inside a sleeping bag. He watched her approach, with amazement and gleaming in his eyes at the same time.
She crouched beside him, and as if forgetting that she was surrounded by people watching them, Lara stared into Armin's blue eyes, feeling her own begin to water.
Without meaning to, she placed her fingertips on Armin's cheek, as if she couldn't believe he was there, alive in front of her, for the image of his entire burned body was still flashing before her eyes. But as she touched his face, she quickly pulled her hand away, as if she got a shock and realized what she had done.
Armin got very blushed.
Lara gave him a smile and gently hugged him.
"Welcome back, Officer..."
For a moment, Armin was speechless, but then, he slowly wrapped his arms around Lara, closing his eyes.
"Thank you," he whispered, giving a little smile.
They both remained there, hugging each other. They didn't know exactly for how long, for they only pulled back when they heard Levi clear his throat loudly.
Before walking away, Lara inadvertently looked down and noticed that Armin was only wearing Eren's beige jacket on the upper part of his body. Immediately, she felt her face turn hot and red.
She got up in a jump, finding this kind of sensation quite strange, for it was the first time this had happened to her. She walked over to Hange and sat down next to her, in front of Armin. She stared at the ground, embarrassed, feeling all eyes on her.
Levi and Hange looked at each other, with an odd expression. He then cleared his throat once more and poked Eren's head.
"Come on!" he exclaimed, slightly grumpy, "Explain everything that happened to Armin."
Abashed, Eren calmly explained all the events that had taken place, from when Armin faced the Colossal Titan, until the current moment. Armin stared at a fixed point, with an expression of pure fright.
"You understood everything?" asked Levi.
Armin remained silent, then, he looked down at a waterskin he was holding.
"S-So..." he began, softly, "The ten people who are here, are the only ones left of the Survey Corps?"
"Yeah, for the time being..." replied Jean, wearily. Connie was trying to get Sasha some water to drink.
"We've been looking for survivors down there since the fight ended, about four hours ago," said Lara, crestfallen. "But, we didn't find any..."
Armin looked down at his own hands as he repeated Eren's words, trying to process them.
"So, after we sealed Shiganshina's outer gate, Reiner, the Beast Titan, and that other quadrupedal Titan escaped together," his eyes were wide, "Bertholdt was captured, and then, there was a dispute about using the serum on Commander Erwin or me..."
Eren and Mikasa were downcast, kneeling beside Armin, who at this moment, widened his eyes even more and gritted his teeth.
"And then..." he continued, with a shaky voice, "I became a Titan and... D-Devoured B-Bertholdt?"
Armin seemed he was about to throw up and had to cover his mouth with his hands. Lara almost got up to help him, but Jean was already offering him more water, and Armin took many gulps, trying to get rid of that horrible taste he felt in his mouth. He stared at a fixed point, panting, eyes wide and sweat pouring down his forehead.
"W-Why me?" whispered Armin, terrified. "No matter how much you talk, that serum should've been given to Commander Erwin..." Armin turned to Levi. "Captain, why did you choose me?!"
Levi grimaced, clicking his tongue. He gave a light kick on Eren's back.
"I told you to tell him everything!" he said, then he looked at Mikasa and Eren. "Your friends here did not agree with that line of thought... In fact, they didn't like my initial decision and stood up to me."
Levi looked at his daughter, which made everyone turn to her as well. Seeing her father's look, Lara pressed her lips together.
"As your Leader," she said, "it's my duty to say that Eren and Mikasa acted with the worst possible behavior, not following the orders of their superiors and still facing them with extreme boldness, and even with violence, something unacceptable for a soldier of the Survey Corps or any other regiment. You must be punished for that," Lara lowered her head. "But, as I also failed on leading you at one point, I'll let Captain Levi himself apply your punishments, even for me, if necessary."
Lara looked at her father, who gave her an approving expression, blinking slowly. Eren and Mikasa lowered their heads, embarrassed. Armin gazed at his two friends in disbelief.
"We'll accept our punishment..." replied Eren.
"While you're being punished for your insubordination," said Hange, wearily, "do not think that, by accepting the punishment, your actions will be forgiven."
"You're right..." replied Eren, understanding, but still very embarrassed.
"However..." said Levi, "The final decision was mine. I chose that Erwin should die here, and you, to take the serum."
"I still don't understand..." replied Armin, his voice breaking. "We couldn't let Commander Erwin die..." his voice seemed to reach a certain tone of despair. "What can we do without the Commander?!"
"I also thought that Erwin was the right person for us to save," said Hange. "That's my opinion... Anyway, I wish we could've prevented things from ending up this way... But, I agree with Levi's reasons for choosing you and, after all, he was the person responsible for making this decision... And that's all that matters now."
Armin still wore an expression of astonishment. It was too much for him to digest.
"You now carry the weight of Erwin's life and the power of a Titan," continued Hange, looking steadily at him. "No matter what anyone says, this is who you are now."
"D-Do I need to replace Commander Erwin?!" asked Armin, bewildered. "I can't do this! I barely managed to fulfill my role as Lara's Officer..."
"Don't get me wrong," replied Levi, "but you cannot replace Erwin. But now, you have a set of abilities that no other human possesses: the power of the Colossal Titan." Armin turned to him, perplexed. "I won't regret my decision." Levi gave Mikasa and Eren a little shove, "But, you better not give these two morons any reasons for them to regret it," he then looked at his daughter, "or make me regret in allowing Lara to make you her Officer," Armin stared deeply at her, "and you, above all, never regret."
Levi put a lot of emphasis on those last words.
"These are my orders to you," he concluded.
Armin had tears in his eyes, still scared of it all. Then, they heard a groan coming from Sasha, who, with difficulty, exclaimed:
"Shut up!"
Everyone turned to her, puzzled. For a moment, they were afraid of what Levi would reply. But, surprising them all, Hange began to laugh.
"We're no match for Sasha," she said, looking at Levi. Then, she turned to the others, "Well, as the successor of Erwin as Commander, I'm also facing a lot of pressure."
Lara felt a great tightness in her chest. There were many things Hange didn't tell her about certain matters concerning the Survey Corps, especially when she and Levi had meetings with Erwin. It was nothing personal, but it was due to the fact that Lara simply hadn't reached a higher rank to get involved in these subjects.
Because, even though both Hange and Lara were Squad Leaders, Lara's rank was still a little lower, as she was her father's subordinate. Hange, however, was already fully autonomous with her Squad.
However, this subject she could not hide from her daughter. A few days before going to Shiganshina, Hange called Lara and Levi to talk in her bedroom, telling them that Erwin had chosen her as the successor to the position of Commander, in case the worst happened. At that time, Lara and Levi lowered their heads and felt a pang in their hearts, both because they perhaps were facing the possible death of someone close, and of Hange having to assume a huge responsibility, which would demand a lot from herself, and it worried them.
In the end, upon receiving this news, they sat on Hange's bed with her and both Levi and Lara gently squeezed her hands, as if to say that they would be there for her, and that she could count on them for anything. Hange hugged them in thanks.
"Now," continued Hange, still looking at Armin, "we both just have to strengthen our determination."
"Yes..." he replied, crestfallen.
"Right," said Hange, getting up. "If Armin's already feeling well, then I think it's time for us to get going. Now, Levi, Eren, Mikasa, and I will proceed with the investigation, going to the basement of his house. The others stay here, under Lara's command."
"Understood," they all answered, with Lara giving a little smile to her mother, who replied.
"Eren," called Hange, "I hope you still have that key, you didn't lose it, right?"
"Yeah..." he replied, pressing it against his chest, "It's still right here."
Eren and Mikasa began to get ready to go to the basement, accompanied by Armin, who claimed he needed to walk a bit. Connie and Jean stayed with Sasha, while Floch still studied the area further away. Hange and Levi also walked away to get ready, followed by Lara.
"Are you sure you guys don't want me to go along?" asked Lara, as she watched her parents check their ODM gear gases.
"No need to, darling," replied Hange, giving her a sweet look. "Stay here and take care of everything, so when we get back we can begin our return home." She quickly glanced back, "Oh, make sure Armin feels fine... The poor kid seems pretty traumatized... It must not be easy to know you've just eaten someone..." Hange shook her body, shivering.
Levi let out a big snort, looking annoyed. His eyes were covered by the shadow of his hair. Hange and Lara looked at each other, confused.
"What's up, dad? Are you okay?"
Levi remained silent, ignoring her.
"Hey!" Hange poked him nervously. "Our daughter's talking to you!"
"I was right, Hange!" replied Levi, now really annoyed. "Did you see for how long Lara and Armin hugged?! If I hadn't coughed, they'd still be hugging each other by now!"
"Oh, sweet Jesus," Hange rolled her eyes, "here we go..."
"Dad!" exclaimed Lara, becoming extremely red. "W-What in the world...?!"
"This thing of him being your Officer is just an excuse, isn't it?" asked Levi. "I got it right, Hange! Look what this is turning into!"
Hange rolled her eyes once more and looked at Lara, as if to say "ignore him". She pulled Levi by his green cloak, dragging him to the edge of the Wall. Lara watched them, mouth agape. In the meantime, Eren and Mikasa approached.
"Be right back, sweetie," said Hange, still dragging Levi.
"We'll talk at home, am I clear?" he said, looking back with difficulty. "Behave!"
Lara got so embarrassed, she covered her face, staring at her own feet. Eren and Mikasa watched that scene, a little confused. Lara gave them an awkward smile, waving.
"Have a nice exploration!" she said, before turning around and quickly walking towards the rest of her Squad, as Hange, Levi, Mikasa, and Eren flew towards his old house, to the basement.
Lara asked Armin, Floch, Jean, and Connie to gather around Sasha. She directed Floch to explore the Wall, in order to see if he could find any supplies left behind, while Connie would do the same on the opposite side. Because of his injured arm, Jean would stay to take care of Sasha, and Armin should rest (he tried to refuse, but Lara insisted), while she would organize all the provisions, so that when her parents, Eren, and Mikasa returned, they could go home.
Each went to their posts. Lara organized some sleeping bags and food rations they still had. Every now and then, she found herself glancing at Armin, who was standing on the edge of the Wall, watching the destroyed Shiganshina in front of him. She noticed that he also glanced back at her, often.
The sun was slowly setting as a cool breeze began to pass through them. Lara looked at Armin, worried that he was cold. Then, she grabbed a blanket and walked toward him. Gently, she placed it over Armin's shoulders, startling him a little.
"Th-Thanks," he said, with a little smile, as he closed the blanket around him.
Lara replied the smile and looked at Shiganshina.
"How are you doing?"
"Can I be honest?" asked Armin. "Terrible... I'm still waiting to wake up and see that everything was just a nightmare..."
Lara took a deep breath. She felt her jaw tremble.
"Armin..." she began, turning to look at him, "I wanna tell you that--"
"You don't have to tell me anything, Lara..." he replied, with a sad smile.
She opened her mouth to speak again, but was interrupted.
"And you don't need to apologize to me."
Lara's eyes widened in surprise.
"If I were in your shoes..." Armin paused, pressing his eyes and lips together, "I would also have chosen Commander Erwin... I know how important he was to you and your parents."
"But you are important, Armin!" replied Lara, speaking without thinking. She blushed and coughed a few times, "Y-You all are important..."
He gave her a sad smile once more, shy.
"Thank you..."
Lara rubbed her hands together, avoiding his eyes. After a while, she asked:
"Why didn't you let me go with you to fight the Colossal Titan? I keep thinking that if I had gone, I could've avoided all this."
"No, Lara," replied Armin, turning to her and gently squeezing her shoulder. "Do not even think about blaming yourself for what happened."
"But if I had gone, I could've--"
"You were in no condition," he said, looking at her sadly. "Hange was presumed dead. I didn't let you go, 'cause I didn't want you to suffer any more, because deep down," Armin looked up at the sky, "I think I knew it would cost my life..." He looked back at her, "And I would not bear to know that you could've died because of me."
Lara felt her eyes burn, as she stared at Armin with an expression of pain. Once more, she felt a different kind of pulse in her heart.
"Besides," he continued, looking down, "I think it would be a big thump to Captain Levi. Just imagine... At that moment, if Hange had really died, he would've left here without her, without you, without his best friend... How would he be? How would he decide who to give the serum to if he had more people to choose from?"
Lara hadn't thought of it that way. For a moment, she felt a great sadness in her heart as she imagined what her dear father would be like if he were in that situation. Lara promised herself she would give him a hug when he got back from the basement. She caught herself chuckling when she wondered that maybe it would cool down some of that silly jealousy Levi was in.
Lara turned back at him, with a smile and tears in her eyes.
"Armin..." she said, squeezing her hand on his shoulder, "Thank you very much."
Of the two hundred soldiers who went to battle in Shiganshina, only ten of them returned: Hange, Levi, Lara, Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Jean, Connie, Sasha, and Floch. Amazingly, they were all greeted with great jubilation on their homecoming.
Levi thought it was best for Hange to decide on Eren and Mikasa's punishment, who got imprisoned for a few days, but they were released earlier, as Darius Zackly, the General of the three Military branches, thought it would be a bad example to imprison the heroes who helped defeat the Colossal Titan.
Regarding Lara's punishment, Hange and Levi talked for a long time, including with her, and they ended up finding out that during the battle, when Lara was emotionally unable to lead due to Hange's supposed death, at a certain point, she ended up having to tell her parents that Armin also wanted to transfer his post as Officer to Jean, for he wasn't feeling prepared, either.
So, Lara told them that in the face of that whole situation, she made the decision that, at that moment, no one was a Leader, Officer, or subordinate, but that everyone should work as equals. After talking alone, Hange and Levi came to the conclusion that they would not punish neither Lara nor Armin, for Lara had shown a good solution to the emotional catastrophe they were going through, and Armin, even though he wanted to give up on his post, was the one who helped the most on defeating the Colossal Titan.
But not to set a bad example, Hange suggested that both Lara and Armin should clean the stables for a week. They obeyed and in the end, it did well for them, for they spent a lot of time together (much to Levi's unhappiness), talking to each other, trying to distract their minds from everything that had happened.
Hange was already starting to get a little stressed out about her new position as Commander, because apparently, people thought she and Levi were just idiots who let the Armored and Beast Titan escape. Besides the fact that now, she no longer could devote herself that much to her beloved research on the Titans.
Because of that, her blood pressure began to get considerably high, which left her with lots of headaches at first. Lara tried to think of solutions to relieve her mother's stress, but one night, when she got to her room to sleep, she found Hange sprawled on the bed, still in her uniform and goggles, with Levi massaging her feet.
So, they ended up acquiring the habit of almost every night, before Hange went to sleep, she would receive a foot massage session from Levi, and Lara would lay her on her lap, massaging her head, to relieve the pressure. Hange would wake up incredibly refreshed and happy the next morning, and over time, her blood pressure soon returned to normal.
Just as promised, in the first few days they returned home, Lara made a beautiful drawing of Moblit and hung it up in the lab, which made Hange burst into tears, because at the time, she was still very stressed. Lara tried to comfort her, but ended up crying too, and in the end, Levi found them hugging on the floor of the lab, which startled him and he was the one who had to comfort the girls.
Lara realized that the Headquarters' mourning mood was very, very heavy. Then, she had an idea. One day, after she and Armin had cleaned the stables, she asked him to help her glue together many pieces of paper to make a big poster. So, they both wrote down the names of all the soldiers who had unfortunately died in the Battle of Shiganshina, and put the poster on the message board of the refectory.
This created a bit of a buzz at first, because the remaining soldiers would always stand in front of the poster, running their fingers over the names of dear friends who were gone, while crying. Lara asked Armin if that was really a good idea, as people were seeming to be getting even sadder, but he told her no, and over time, the poster actually proved to be very useful, making people pass by it with a nostalgic look, no longer with sadness.
Hange and Levi tried to hide their grief from Lara, trying to look strong, but their eyes didn't lie. Once in a while, she would find them wandering around, with sad and dejected expressions.
The worst day was when Hange, Levi, and Lara went to Erwin's bedroom to empty it and take his things away. Each object or piece of Erwin's clothing that they took was a reason for a big sigh and at a certain point, the three of them couldn't take it anymore and had to hug each other and cry a little more for the loss of their loved one.
Hange and Lara noticed how Levi struggled to show how sad he was with the death of his best friend, so they always encouraged him to really go through the grieving process, allowing himself to cry, miss him, and seek their help when he was not well, which made him feel much better.
Lara also felt a strong thump with all those losses, catching herself in Erwin's office (which was now her mother's), running her fingers over the chess pieces they used to play, and feeling some tears run down her cheeks.
Near the end of Lara and Armin's punishment period, Levi went to the stables to check how the cleaning work was going, and got startled to see that they were hugging each other, with Lara crying on his shoulder. At first, Levi thought about interrupting them, but he finally realized it was about time to stop this kind of childish behavior and saw that Armin was a good kid, after all.
One afternoon, Hange and Levi found Lara praying on the edge of her bed, weeping softly. It was a common behavior of hers, which they tried not to disturb. They noticed that Lara had started to do it more frequently in the last few days, and apparently, she would always seem to end her prayers with a calmer and more serene countenance, even showing a little happiness. Then, one night, Hange and Levi shyly asked Lara to teach them how to pray, which she gladly did, and in time, her parents also began to acquire this behavior, noticing that the pain of grief seemed to go away much faster after each prayer they said, for they felt a wonderful comfort in their hearts.
A few days later, all ten soldiers who had returned alive had a council meeting with Queen Historia, to talk about the mission of Shiganshina's retake and what they had actually found in the basement.
Hange explained that they did retake Wall Maria, thanks to the deaths of the many heroes that were gone, including Erwin Smith, as well as they also gained the power of the Colossal Titan. However, Hange bemoaned that their true enemies might no longer be just the Titans, but humans as well. In fact, everyone else in the world apparently hated the people who lived inside the Walls.
She also explained that, inside the desk drawer in Eren's basement, they found three journals, in which were written the memories of his father and a report of what life was like outside the Walls. It was all a great surprise to everyone, for they discovered that humanity had not perished after all, and that, according to these journals, the people who lived inside the Walls were a race capable of transforming into Titans, subjects of a woman named Ymir, who lived many years ago. And apparently, they had the ability to rule the world, as they had done it long before, and because of that, other people wanted to eradicate them so bad.
Apparently, the first king of the walls did not want to make war and possessed the power to erase the memories of his subjects, which he actually did, making everyone forget their past and history, leaving his entire population trapped inside the Walls, claiming that they were the only survivors on the face of the earth. He also threatened the rest of the world to use the Colossal Titans from within the Walls, in case the worst happened. This threat made them continue to live in peace.
In his time, the mission of Eren's father was to pass the power of the Founding Titan to Eren, so they put an ending to this problem, and he did it, by giving him a serum when he was little, but it ended up resulting in Eren having to devour his own father (which was quite a shock to the boy when he regained this memory). However, the power of the Founding Titan could only be used by someone from the Royal Family. But due to the first king's vow to renounce the war, no one was able to act against his will.
However, even if Eren didn't have royal blood, he might be able to use the power of the Founding Titan, as he once had. There was so much information, Lara thought her head was going to explode. And, at a certain point in the meeting, Eren screamed so loud, that it startled everyone around, but in the end, he didn't want to say why he behaved that way. Lara saw that her mother noticed something, but to be not embarrassed in front of the council, Hange made the excuse that Eren was going through puberty, claiming that is why he was acting strange sometimes.
At the end of the meeting, everyone was astonished by all this new information, but Queen Historia thought it better to reveal everything to people, in the next day's newspaper, which really caused a huge commotion in the entire population. It was revealed that all Titans that had so far terrorized them, were not only humans, but also a race of their ancestor, Ymir. It was also explained to everyone what the first king had done, by building the Walls, erasing people's memories, and lying to them.
In addition to all this, what also shook people was the fact that they found out that everyone else in the world considered them such a low race, they were considered "a race of devils", and that enemies would invade the Walls to extract their natural resources. They also discovered that the first attacks by the Colossal and Armored Titans were part of the first steps of this invasion.
The next night, Hange and Levi found Lara sitting on her bed, staring at a fixed point and wide-eyed. They sat beside her, looking at each other, worried.
"What will become of us?" asked Lara, in a low tone. "I-I don't understand... Why they hate us? We've been seeking our freedom from the Titans' threat for so long... Wasn't it enough to discover that they were humans, now to also discover that the rest of the world doesn't even see us as people, but as devils?!" - she spat that word out in disgust - "Who threaten their very existence..."
Lara stared desperately at her parents.
"What if the result of all this hatred causes something worse? What if a terrible war breaks out over this?! How long will this cycle continue?!"
"Sweetie..." replied Hange, kindly, "What I wanted most at this moment was to be able to solve all this in a peaceful way, sitting at a table, having a good tea..." she gave a sad little smile, "What we have left is to try to solve this whole situation in the best possible way..."
Lara lowered her head, covering her face with her hands. Hange and Levi looked at each other, even more worried. As parents, they knew Lara trusted them fully, hoping that they had the answers and solutions to almost everything, as they were her great examples and inspiration. But at that moment, they both felt very lost, wondering if they knew what they were doing and what was the right solution to it all. For an instant, they reflected on how difficult and challenging it was to be a parent.
A few days later, all ten soldiers who had come back from Shiganshina were invited to receive a medal of honor for having returned alive and to have fought bravely.
Lara and Levi were standing in a corner of the great hall, in silence, while Hange was doing Commander stuff here and there, looking a bit exhausted. Eren, Mikasa, Armin, Connie, Sasha, and Jean were nearby, with Floch.
After they spent that week together in the stables, and Armin began to stay with Eren and Mikasa in the prison, Lara felt he was getting a little distant from her, being someone who now replied to her with just a few words, and if Lara wasn't mistaken, she felt that Armin was also avoiding her, but she couldn't understand why. As they waited for the ceremony to begin, she would catch herself glancing constantly at him, who occasionally glanced back at her as well, but Lara noticed that there was a very sad expression on his face.
At one point, Floch and Eren began to argue over whether it was better for Commander Erwin to have received the serum, not Armin. Floch was so upset, that even close to Levi, he said that the Captain and Eren had been carried away by their emotions. Lara took a step forward to intervene for her father and Armin, but Levi lightly pulled her back, signaling her with his head to remain quiet and leave them be.
The ceremony started and the ten soldiers received their medals. As they were receiving them, at the moment Eren was kissing Queen Historia's hand in thanks, he once more began to behave strangely, which caused some embarrassment to the others.
And so, four months passed and little by little, the pain of grief became lighter and easier to deal with.