S11, E12
Tablet in hand, Helena walked to the elevator with Maggie, finding Meredith holding her suitcase.
"You're back!" The short girl smiled.
"Hey! How'd go with the kids?" The blond asked her sister.
"Great! They're amazing, I just dropped them off at daycare." She nodded.
"Thanks again for watching them."
"How about you? How was your weekend? In DC? With your husband?" Maggie asked.
"It... was fun...!" She smiled. "I'm a little exhausted, you know."
"But it was the good kind of exhausted, right? Did you even leave the bedroom?" Callie joined them. "Was he surprised? Did he freak?!"
"Did he, Mer? Freak?" Helena teased, with a knowing smile.
"Or did you just go straight to getting freaky?" Callie sang.
"You know, did we even push the button, because it's just..." Meredith pressed the elevator button again, repeatedly.
"Oh, you pushed the button." Helena smiled.
As the elevator opened, Alex, who was inside, let out. "Hey, look who's back!"
"Meredith was just about to tell us about her weekend. With Derek." Maggie insisted.
"Oh, was she, now?" Helena tried to hold in a giggle.
"Tell me now so you don't show up in my bed tonight. It's a good thing you didn't walk in on this morning." Alex smirked.
"Oh, everyone is getting freaky but me..." Callie exhaled.
"Actually, I was just about to... I actually remembered I have to, uh... yeah..." Meredith let out, exiting the elevator with Helena behind her.
"You're a terrible liar." The short girl told her.
"Shut up..."
——
"Hey!" Arizona let out, entering the MRI viewing room, where Amelia, Helena and Stephanie already were. Turning on the microphone, she apologized. "Sorry I'm late, sorry I'm late."
"Three surgeries today, Robbins. Campos is not gonna round by herself." The woman reprimanded.
"I know, we're on it!" The blond reassured, then telling the women. "Yeah, uh, Wilson just barged in and stole my shower. Edwards, does she always walk around naked?"
"Not around the hospital, generally." She told them.
With a giggle, Helena let out. "It's like residents gone wild."
"Robbins, you live with residents?!" Nicole sat up, in the machine.
"Oh, God. Is that thing still on?" Arizona looked to the microphone.
"You're a grownup! Get your own place, I need you focused here!" She reprimanded.
"Lie down, Nicole." Amelia instructed, the woman complying.
"So, d-did Wilson just climb in the shower with you?" She asked.
"Yeah... no. Well, instead of me."
"Was she coming on to you?" The woman asked.
"No!" Arizona exclaimed.
"Doubtful." Stephanie let out.
"Honestly, I'm like 95% sure Alex wouldn't mind." Helena shrugged.
"You know what? Can we- just drop it." Arizona squealed.
"Residents gone wild." Nicole chuckled, making Helena do the same.
"Would you two go?" Amelia asked. "You're making her laugh too much."
As the Dimpled Duo left the room, Helena let out. "You know, Wilson getting naked in front of you reminds me of something..."
"What?" The blond asked.
"Well, I'm only gonna tell you because there are no bricks around, but when Callie was living with us, my intern year, she did have a bit of a thing for walking around naked, too. Like, once, she had just showered and George said she was wearing his towel, and then, bam, naked Callie in the middle of the hallway." She chuckled.
"Yeah, she did that..." Arizona agreed.
"I think she toned it down when I told her it was a little uncomfortable for me, because I'm into girls... you should try that." Helena suggested.
——
Helena walked down the stairs with Nicole, approaching Arizona and Alex, the older woman calling out. "Robbins, let's go scrub."
"Coming. Listen, just talk to her, and- and maybe buy her a robe." Arizona tried.
"Why would I do that?" Alex scoffed.
"Is this about the naked resident?" Nicole asked.
"Yeah." Helena confirmed.
"Oh, you and Wilson. You're a thing?" The woman asked.
"You know what? Let's not..." Arizona pleaded.
"And Robbins can get handsy with the residents." Alex told her, making Arizona's mouth drop open.
At that, Helena simply giggled, burying her face in Alex's shoulder.
"I do not!" The blond argued.
"Last year, she got handsy. HR got involved. There are policies now..." Alex explained.
"Because of you?" Nicole asked. "Robbins, that's incredible."
"Incredible?" Helena chuckled.
"It's not- it- both of you. Stop. Ok?" Arizona then turned to Helena. "And, Lena, a little support?"
"Alex, maybe just... let her walk around your room naked? You know, she's a resident, Arizona is her superior, she's a girl who likes girls...." Helena tried.
"It just puts us both in a very awkward position and you should respect that." Arizona tried.
"Well, I'm kind of down for whatever happens." He shrugged.
"I did tell you..." Helena tilted her head.
"Hey!" Jo greeted.
"Hey. You need to start putting on pants around the house, because Robbins keeps checking out your ass." Alex told her.
"No, no. Alex, no. Your ass is- it's...fine."
"See? That's reportable." Nicole nodded.
"Not even I can defend you like this." Helena smiled.
"No! I... I hate you all. I have surgery." Arizona announced, walking away.
"This is the best day." Nicole chuckled.
——
"You know, I used to be fun." Arizona let out, laying in a couch with Herman on the other side, Helena sprawled out over an armchair. "I used to skate around the halls of this hospital."
"Why don't you?" Nicole asked, making Helena shoot her a look. "Oops. My bad."
"I used to go dancing. I used to... flirt, and be flirted with. Now I live in a house full of naked people, and all of my friends are her friends, and all I have is work and I never wanna go home." The woman let out.
"I had a busy, busy life. I sat on all these boards. Pacific ballet, Seattle Opera..." Nicole let out.
"Oh, you've gotta be brave to sit through opera..." The young girl muttered.
"I just did whatever was important to my ex. I used to be so worried about what he thought of me, what my peers though, what everybody though. But now? I do what I want, when I want, and it's sweet." She nodded. "I have to tell you, my life is so much better now that I have nothing. I mean, I can't recommend a tumor, but you should try it."
"You have fun." Arizona concluded.
"I do." She nodded.
"I have fun. It's never... it's not like it used to be. I don't stay up late to get Cristina and Meredith home when they got black out drunk, and we don't have dance parties like we used to, at least not as often. Mark and I can't stay in bed all day when our days off coincide, and he doesn't wake up to all three of us in his bed. A-and maybe I don't go out to Joe's as often with friends, because we're busier now, we have kids o-or partners, or work. But I still have fun." Helena announced, with a soft smile. "Now the four of us just dance around the kitchen, when I play portuguese music, so I can hear Ali make fun of Mark's accent. And we still get to have our fun before the girls wake up, when I'm wearing the tank tops that he loves, or I'm in the mood. Now we get to go to the park, and I hold Cara as she points and figures out how to say "tree", as Mark and Ali feed the ducks." With a chuckle, she remembered. "The other day Sofia and Zola came over, the three of them are inseparable, and Mark failed miserably at building them a pillow fort. It ended up collapsing on top of him. And I still have fun with my friends, too. Meredith still gets tequila drunk while Mark and Derek babysit the girls, when she crashes at my place. And we still take over Alex's bed when one of us has an emergency. I FaceTime Cristina, and I pretend to be interested in football when Callie comes over to watch it with Mark, or to enjoy baking when April wants to make a cake. And I almost spend more time with you two than with my own husband. I still have fun. It's just different. Better, in a way."
"You two should go home." The blond exhaled.
"I am home. Why do you think I stole this couch?" Their mentor nodded towards the one she lay on. "We can't waste a minute. I'm gonna stay here until, uh... until it's over. Whatever that means."
"Then I'll stay with you tonight." Arizona told her.
"Yes, I'm staying, too. Mark's got the girls, I just have to call them. I can stay tonight." Helena smiled, with a nod.
"You should know... I'm not going to have sex with you. We're not going to have some weird sort off threesome on the couch." Nicole let out, dead serious.
"Shut up!" Arizona let out, as she chuckled.
"Oh, God..." Helena buried her head in her hands, giggling, as Nicole proudly let out.
"I've traumatized Campos."
——
S11, E13
Week 1
"Good morning!" Arizona let out, as she and Helena entered the room they had slept in the previous night.
"Robbins, are you ever not chirpy? Does that every happen?" The taller woman asked.
"Are you ever not snarky?" Helena narrowed her eyes. At the confused look the blond shot her, she explained. "I need my sleep. And you, Nicole, snore. I don't get my sleep, I become pouty."
"Uh, yeah. I can't crash here again without earplugs..." Arizona agreed. "So, we have seven cases today. The first one is in two hours."
"Also, it's Friday. Friday is MRI day." Helena pointed out.
"47 minutes of my very limited life span wasted." She rolled her eyes.
"Come one, come on." Arizona tried.
"God, I'm coming. Stop chirping!" Nicole complained.
"Stop snarking." Helena shot back.
——
"Three down, all these to go." Herman pointed out, taking down some cards from their board, Helena by her side.
"We've got four months worth of surgeries up here. How are we ever gonna get them done in eight weeks?" She bit the inside of her cheek.
"We just do, I suppose." She shrugged. "And you'll do the next one yourself. I'll watch."
At that, the short girl let out a little panicked giggle. "What? No. I appreciate it, the vote of confidence, but I don't- "
"I need to see what you've learned. What you can and can't do on your own, while I'm still around to fix it when you screw up." She explained.
"How optimistic..." Helena muttered.
"It's not a vote of confidence, it's a necessity. Training wheels are off, Campos. Time is up." The older woman told her. "Now, what next?"
"Your radiation treatment."
At that, Herman made a little complaining noise. "Radiation hasn't worked yet. I don't see why it's suddenly supposed to start working. Radiation is bull- "
"I don't care." Helena interrupted, making use of her mom glare. "I don't care if you don't want to, I don't care if you don't believe in it. Shepherd says you need it, and she's the doctor. So we're getting your ass to the radiation floor and we're doing it now."
"Jeez, fine." Herman complained. "I see the mothering has started. Robbins did warn me about that."
——
"Are you warm enough?" Helena asked, as she draped the blanket over Nicole's legs.
"I'm fine." The woman told her, then nodding towards the room's ceiling. "Charming, isn't it? They put clouds on the ceiling to distract you. Least they could do is put something interesting up there. Like porn."
Helena chuckled, as the nurse placed the cover over Nicole's head. As she fastened it, the older woman began breathing quickly.
"Are you ok?" Helena asked.
"Sure." She agreed, taking a deep breath.
"Ok." She nodded. "I'll see you after, then?"
However, as she was turning to leave, Nicole grabbed her hand, Helena immediately placing both of hers over the woman's fist.
She held her mentor's hand, as she saw her panicking, as she saw the strong woman she was breaking down.
"You're ok." Helena whispered, tears in her eyes. "You're ok."
Then, with a deep breath, she left the room.
——
Week 2
"Here, feel that? You wanna find a spot with just the right amount to give." Herman instructed, in surgery with Helena. "That's where you wanna cut. You're up, Campos."
"Oh, I-I've never done that part before." She muttered. "I- really? You're serious?"
"It's time. Make the cut."
"Ok." Helena told a deep breath. "Scalpel, please."
The blade in her hand, the short girl readjusted her feet on her step stool, before pressing the blade onto the flesh.
——
"Hey." Helena pressed a kiss to her husband's forehead, who sat down with Callie, Meredith, Alex and Maggie at lunch. "Ali brought her favorite doll to daycare this morning, make sure she doesn't forget it when you pick them up?"
With a hum, he nodded. "'Mariana?"
"Yes, Mariana the doll." Then, narrowing her eyes at his plate, she let out. "Oh, baby carrots."
She sat down by him, taking the vegetable to her mouth, tuning into what Callie was saying. "Oh my God. And I seriously wishing for a sexless relationship where I don't have to groom myself? Is that where I am now?"
"Sounds good to me." Maggie shrugged.
"Welcome to my life these days." Meredith shared.
"You chicks need to get laid." Alex let out.
"That also sounds good to me." Maggie nodded.
"Not without the grooming." Meredith told her.
"It's in there. He can find it. What, he can't do a little work first?" She shrugged.
"I like her." Mark let out, with a chuckle.
As Helena saw her pager go off, she looked down to the device, letting out. "I gotta go."
Standing up, she glanced back down to her husband's tray, smiling up to him as she stole his jello.
——
Helena walked to the main nurses station, after having been paged. Leaning over the counter, the woman let out. "Hey, I got a page?"
"Yes, Dr. C. There's a woman asking to see you." The nurse nodded.
As Helena turned to look at the waiting area, her breath hitched in her throat.
It was Hannah. Hannah Turner.
She composed herself, then approaching her, with a soft smile. "Hannah. Hi, it's good to see you."
"Dr. C." She smiled, going in for a hug. This time, however, the baby bump was in the way. "Thank you for coming."
"Of course. You know it, for you and Peter, always." She nodded. "How have you two been? I haven't seen you in... what? A year?"
"A little over, I'd say." She nodded. "We've been holding up. Now we've actually got something to look forward to." The woman placed her hand on the baby bump.
"What can I do for you?" Helena asked.
——
"Nicole! Nicole!" Helena called out, running down the hallway to meet the woman, who walked with Arizona. "I need us to take on another patient."
"Sorry?" The woman asked.
"Here." Helena handed her the chart. "Hannah Turner. We need to take her case."
"You've seen this type of case before." The older woman pointed out. "We're working on a time frame, I have a very specific list to teach you two. This woman isn't one of them."
"Is that a no?" Helena scrunched up her nose.
"It's a no."
"Well, then as a personal favor to me. Please." The short girl urged. "Just for me personally, we need to take this case."
"We have no time to make it personal. It's a no. I'm sorry. I'll get her some names, she can see one of them." The woman shut her off, leaving.
"I'm sorry." Arizona muttered.
——
Week 3
Helena knew that she shouldn't have done what she did. She didn't like lying and she didn't like going behind people's backs. But, in this case, she felt she had to.
So, now, in Hannah Turner's patient room, she told Herman. "I'm concerned about her blood pressure. It's increased to 140 systolic, in the past week, and her swelling's gotten worse..."
"Uh, I used to have ankles. Now I have balloons with toes." Hannah smiled. "It was never nearly this bad with Alice."
Helena smiled softly at her, as she took her ultrasound, Nicole telling her. "So, your baby has a large tumor in her lower back. It's most likely benign, but because of its size and vascular nature, it could cause an accumulation of fluids in the baby."
"But the tumor could be removed, right?" She asked, fidgeting. "Dr. C says amazing things about you... that you're one of the best."
"She said that? How flattering..." Nicole let out, shooting her fellow a deadly look.
——
"That was Hannah Turner." Nicole reprimanded, out in the hallway. "You've been asking me non stop the past few days, and I've said no. How am I supposed to trust you at all when you pull something like that?"
"I'm just trying to get your help on a patient. A patient that needs your help. That needs our help. And this patient... if you knew what she's been through..." Helena pleaded.
"Now you're trying to appeal to my sad, bleeding heart. Doesn't work with me." The woman interrupted.
"Well, then I'll appeal to your ego." Helena announced, raising her tone a bit. "You say you're the best. Then be the best. You can save her. You can save her baby's life. So save the baby's life."
"No!" She denied, turning to leave, as Helena followed her.
"No, don't do that. I've been sleeping here several times a week. I've barely had time to eat, less alone be with my own kids and husband. I've worked my butt off, I've sacrificed my own life, and that's so we can do this. So we can save babies life Hannah's!" Helena insisted, as they entered their lounge.
"Campos, drop it."
"No, I get it, ok. I get it that I've seen tumor like that before, but this can't just be about my education! At some point-"
"At some point, we have to make decisions and stick to them!" She reprimanded. "I wish we had time, but we don't. We have very little control over the time we have, and we have a plan."
"And I'm all for plans! I'm all for strategies and sticking to what we decided, but sometimes the plans just have to be adjusted!" Helena argued.
"Fine. You want to?" Herman nodded towards the board. "Adjust the plan. Take down one of these cards so we have time to help Mrs. Turner. Which one? How about Meghan Carlson, congenital airway obstruction? Her husband's in Iraq right now. Or Julie Hall, Vasa previa. She went through 2 tears of fertility treatments. So, pick one. Decide which baby doesn't get to live so Hannah Turner's does. Go ahead, pick a card. You choose."
Helena fell silent, looking down as she shook her head, a mix of irritation and disbelief on her face.
"That's what I though." Nicole pointed out.
"No! No, don't do that. You don't get it, ok? You don't know what... you don't get it. I owe her this, ok? I owe it to her." Helena explained, bitting the inside of her cheek. "I'm the reason her oldest daughter is not alive anymore. I owe it to her to save this one."
"You don't owe her anything, Campos. You're a pediatric surgeon, you save some kids and you lose some kids." The older woman argued. "I'm sorry that you lost her in surgery, but it happens."
"I-I didn't. I didn't lose her in surgery." Helena shook her head, taking a deep breath. "Five years ago, Derek Shepherd had a patient. He had a brain dead patient, who had a husband. I was a resident, and I was the one who explained to him that his wife wasn't going to wake up. That we had to unplug her because of her paperwork. A couple months later, he came into this hospital with a gun. He came into this hospital looking for the people that he thought were responsible for his wife's death. Looking for Richard Webber, for Lexie Grey, for Derek Shepherd... a-and for me." Her voice shook, as her eyes filled with tears. "I was on the peds floor. I was going to preform a procedure on Alice Turner, Hannah Turner's daughter. Her parents weren't here, so I-I was responsible for her. A-and that little girl... she was special. She was always so curious, she loved seeing me, and I loved seeing her. I'd sneak her around t-to rounds, and take her to my husband's skin lab... she was special." A tear rolled down her cheek, as she sniffled. "S-so when Gary Clark came looking for me, I left the room the kids were in. And I begged him not to hurt them. We w-were out in the hallway, and he was pointing the gun at me. And then I heard her. A-Alice had followed me. And, next thing I know, she was dead in the ground. She was lying in a-a puddle of her own blood, her teddy bear ripped apart. H-he made sure I knew it was my fault. That he never would have touched her if it- if it wasn't for me. And then it was my turn. My turn to- to lay on the ground, in a puddle on my own blood. He came after me. Yet I made it, and Alice didn't." Helena wiped away her tears, as she shook her head. "So I don't care if we don't sleep. I don't care if we stay up every other night working on this case, if we stop having time to eat. If I can't go home for a week. We're taking this case, Nicole. We're taking this case, because I owe them. I owe Hannah and Peter Turner everything, because I took their child away from them, and they never held it against me. They never even hesitated in reassuring me they didn't blame me. So, I don't care what it takes. We're not taking any cards down, and we're not turning Hannah away. We're taking this case."
——
Week 4
Helena's head shot up from where it was resting, over her crossed arms on the hospital library's corner desk, as she heard her phone ring by her head.
"Wh- I'm up. I'm up, I'm up. Oh, the phone." She realized, rubbing her left eye as her right hand shot up to pick up the call. "Hello?"
"Honey? It's me." Mark spoke up. "You fell asleep, I'm guessing, since I haven't gotten updates?"
As she glanced at the time, Helena let out a few Portuguese curse words under her breath, as she apologized. "Oh, God. Querido, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, we were supposed to have dinner, and we hired the baby sitter, the good one and everything! Wait, I think I can still... W-When's the reservation? In, what, twenty minutes? I can still try to make it."
"Lee..." He called out.
"No, no, I can make it." Helena shook her head, shooting up from her seat as she rested her phone on her shoulder, gathering her study supplies. "Ten minutes to get home, since I'm on foot, and then I'll just get ready really quickly, I-I promise, so we're not too late."
"Hey, Lee..."
"God, how would I miss date night?! I'm sorry, querido. I-I was studying for tomorrow's surgery, and the library chair felt so nice and cosy even if it's usually uncomfortable, and next thing I know I'm waking up to the phone." She threw her bag over her shoulder as she quickly walked out of the library, pile of book in hand. Then, she gasped. "Oh, God, I almost just stole hospital books. Wait, I have to go back in and return them."
"Lee." He interrupted, finally successful.
"Yes?" She asked, as she placed the books back where they belonged.
"What do you say to just ordering some pizza so I can tuck you in early?" He suggested.
"No, but you love date night. A-and I do, too."
"Yes, I do. But I care more that you get sleep, which I know you haven't been getting. Plus, I don't really wanna risk you falling asleep on your plate." He teased, making Helena giggle.
"Thank you. I love you, Mark."
"I love you more, Lee."
——
Arizona, Nicole and Helena laid on the grass of the nearby park, all in Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital jackets.
They stared at the sky, the short girl's hair falling in waves around her head, as Nicole let out. "I remember my mom telling me once that when we die we go to heaven. I couldn't picture it. All I could imagine was what we see in cartoons... little people in robes, with wings, sitting on clouds. But nobody really knows what's up there, do they?"
"I think maybe we couldn't handle it. We couldn't handle that knowledge." Helena shrugged. "But little people with wings sounds nice enough. The only serious heaven and hell talk I got growing up were my grandparents saying I was going to hell for dating a girl, when I was young."
"Oh, yeah, that talk...When I was a kid, I used to think that we were like dandelions..." Arizona shared. "Like, the part that makes us us would just blow away and land and grow into something else..."
"That's nice too." The short girl smiled. "I used to think there was nothing. Just... absolutely nothing. The same kind of nothing as there is before you're born, I guess. Now... I mean, I don't know. I do still believe it, but when you see so many people you love die... It makes it harder to come to terms that they're just gone now, just buried in some graveyard."
"I don't wanna be buried, by the way. Have me cremated." Herman told them, making the two other women, in each side of her, turn their heads.
"What?" Arizona asked.
"Sorry?" Helena tried.
"If I survive the surgery but don't wake up, give me five days. A week, tops." She told them.
Helena let out a sigh, as Arizona argued. "This is... we don't need to be taking about this."
"If I do wake up, but I'm dependent on vents or tubes... pull the plug then, too."
"Y-you know what? You're not- you're not dying." Arizona denied. "You're not gonna wake up gorked. Shepherd knows what she's doing. She does."
"Ok. Sure." Nicole shrugged.
"She does!"
"I heard you."
They all went silent again, before Helena finally spoke up. "Nicole?"
"Yes."
"Don't die on us, ok? Because maybe you go to heaven, or you become a plant, or there's nothing. Either way, you either don't realize you're dead or you're in a better place. And I know you've come to terms with that. But we're still gonna be here." Helena tried, biting her bottom lip slightly. "So, just... don't die on us."
At that, Nicole simply gave Helena a quick squeeze of her hand, before informing. "That bird's gonna poop on us. What's next today?"
"Hannah Turner." Arizona told them, making Helena smile.
——
"Thank you for bringing me back in." Hannah smiled, as Nicole took her ultrasound, making Helena smile brightly at her.
"Have a look." The older woman told the two fellows.
"The teratoma has grown." Arizona pointed out.
"It's showing early signs of hydrops." Helena nodded.
"Is everything ok?" The mother fidgeted with the hem of her hospital gown.
"Hannah, your baby's retaining fluid, which is starting to affect his heart. I'm recommending we do the surgery tonight." Nicole told her.
"Tonight? No, Dr. Herman, that's way too soon. Dr. C, it's way too soon, right?" The mother looked to the short doctor, panicked.
"The tumor is creating pressure on your placenta, Hannah. It's not only endangering the baby but you, too." Helena explained, with a reassuring nod.
"But my baby wouldn't survive, would she?" Hannah asked, teary eyed. "If you suddenly had to deliver? Cause I-I'm only 24 weeks along and I-I know that it would help her if she had time to grow, right?" She mumbled. "If I could just hold in for a few more weeks..."
"It's not what's best for you." Nicole put it simply.
"I don't care about me! M-my Alice is dead. But this baby that is inside of me... I cannot risk her life. I won't." She sniffled, as Helena grabbed her hand. "So if there is a choice between helping me or helping my daughter, I chose my daughter. I'm not losing another child, I'm- I'm just not!"
——
"What does she think we're trying to do here?" Nicole vented to her fellows. "I am not negotiating with a patient. I am the doctor. I'm gonna tell her when we're gonna- "
At that, Helena and Arizona shared a look, the blond outwardly chuckling as Helena muffled her giggle with her hand.
"What the hell?!" Nicole asked.
"I'm sorry. I-I'm sorry." Helena muttered.
"It's just... it's funny listening to you get so bent out of shape."
"Since, well, this is the exact same thing you've been doing to Amelia Shepherd since she offered to save your life." Helena shrugged.
"The exact same thing." Arizona hummed in agreement. "'We'll do the surgery when I'm ready.'"
"And it's really frustrating. It drives us crazy." Helena agreed. "It's just... ironic. Like some kind of karma, I guess. But, well, sorry. Keep going."
"I will give Mrs. Turner and extra week, but I want her admitted. And if she so much as hiccups funny, I'm taking her to surgery." Nicole warned.
"Ok. Good. I like that." Helena nodded. "And thank you, for taking the case. I know it's extra work."
"You did sort of leave me no choice..." The woman rolled her eyes.
——
Week 5
"It is so pretty, pequenina." Helena smiled at the drawing Alice was working on, squatting by the daycare table. "Such a pretty drawing."
"Thank you, mama. Obrigada." She smiled. "Mama, I'm going to play with Zola and Sofia now, ok?"
"Alright, my love." She smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "Have fun, today."
"Bye, mama. Adoro-te!"
"I love you more." She smiled, watching the girl run off, as she stood back up.
Helena walked over to the little playpen her youngest was in, with some of her friends, quickly covering her with kisses before saying her goodbyes for the day.
As she left the daycare, she saw Mark approaching it, as he smiled. "Hi, sweetheart."
"Good morning." She smiled. "How was the night shift?"
"It was... the night shift." He mumbled, almost pouting, as he took a sip of his coffee . "I hate the night shift. You?"
"Ali just blew me off to go hang out with her friends. We're getting old." She scrunched up her nose, then taking the coffee from her husband's hand to steal a sip.
"Speak for yourself." He teased.
"Oh, so we're just gonna ignore the fact that you were born over a decade before me, uh?" She teased back, a smile on her face. "Ok, then."
"Uh huh. Ignoring it seems to work." He chuckled.
The two fell into silence for a moment, watching their eldest's curls in the air as she bounced around with Zola and Sofia.
Then, the short girl let out. "I'm scared Mark."
"Honey?" He furrowed his brows.
"I like Herman. I really like Herman... She's- she's great, and fun, and smart, and unapologetic..." She explained.
"And sick." Mark understood, placing an arm around her shoulders.
"Yes. She's sick. A-and I just... I know Amelia has got it. And I trust her. But, at the same time... this is one hell of a tumor, Mark."
"So you're scared that she won't make it?" The plastic surgeon tried.
"Yes. But, selfishly, I'm also really, really scared that I won't be able to take it if she doesn't. I don't know that I can take another loss." She exhaled, shaking her head.
At that, Mark simply pulled her closer, pressing a kiss to her forehead as Helena's eyes filled with tears.
"Are you sure this isn't just about our daughter blowing you off?" He joked, making Helena chuckle through her tears, pushing his arm.
——
"911?" Helena asked, joining Nicole and Arizona in the scrub room. "What's going on?"
"Umbilical bands." Nicole explained, as Helena went to scrub in with her colleagues.
"Oh. Ok. We're just helping, though, right? You're taking the lead on this one?" She asked, grabbing the soap.
"Why would I do that?"
"Because it's emergent." Helena explained.
"And we haven't tried cutting umbilical bands before." Arizona added.
"First time for everything." The older woman shrugged.
"Listen to us, ok? We're not ready to take this over yet." Arizona argued.
"Doesn't matter."
"Of course it- you're not listening to us!" Helena argued. "It does matter. We're telling you we're not ready."
"And you think I am? You think this is easy for me? You think I'm ready?" Nicole argued back, taking off her mask. "I was fine. I got fine with dying. And then you two infected me with your stupid- with Shepherd and her plan and your stupid hope. And now..." Her voice broke, looking down . "It is harder than ever to hand all this over! I don't want to, I'm scared to. I'm scared to let go of it, and it's all your fault, so... I think the very least you can do is deserve it. Take over, do well, make me not regret it. Can you two do that? Please?"
——
"Amelia!" Helena called out, entering a CT viewing room at a fast pace. "I need Herman, I need Herman right now. Hannah Turner's baby is in distress, I just went to check on her and she's severely hypertensive, showing signs of heart failure. We need to take her to the OR, immediately. I really need Herman, so if you could finish up..."
As Amelia simply started at the scan, a blank face, Helena let out. "What's wrong? Amelia, what's wrong? I know that face, I've seen it way too many times, what's going on?"
The neurosurgeon simply nodded towards the computer, announcing. "It's time."
"Now?!" Helena let out.
"I'm gonna go... get an OR ready." Amelia seemed frozen in fear.
"O-ok. Ok. You're ready for this?" Helena asked, her voice shaky. As the woman hummed, the short girl sighed. "Amelia...?"
"I'll get an OR prepped. You'll inform the patient?" She asked, turning to leave.
As she was about to, however, Helena turned around. "Wait. I just... Derek's not better than you. I know you sometimes think he is, but you need to know he's not. He's older, he's a man, and he's most certainly had less obstacles to overcome in his life and his career. Hence he's gotten more recognition. But I've worked under him, when I was a resident. And I've accompanied your work lately, with Herman. He is amazing. But he's not better than you. Not by a long shot. If you're going to do this, Amelia, I need you to remember that."
"I will." She nodded, with a thankful smile.
——
"Campos." Nicole let out, jumping out of the CT machine, as the fellow walked into the room. "What's going on?"
At that, Helena sighed, as she let out. "I saw your scan..."
"I see." The woman nodded slowly, realizing. "Shepherd's prepping the OR?"
"Yes." The brunette nodded.
"If I had to guess, I'd say the tumor's invaded the optic chiasm."
"Yes." The young girl confirmed, not knowing what else to say.
As two men rolled a gurney into the room, Nicole let out. "Ah. My chariot awaits. A little privacy, guys?" When they left the room, she asked. "Did you need me for something? A patient?"
Helena turned around as Nicole began raising her top over her head, changing into the hospital gown. "Uh, Hannah Turner's baby has hydrops. Mom is mirroring and going into CHF."
"Wow." The older woman let out. "Looks like a big day for both of us." At that, Helena closed her eyes, biting the inside of her cheek as she looked down. "What you need to do first is try to embolise the vessels fetoscopically. Make sure her blood pressure is stabilized."
"She has you. Amelia has you. You know that, right?" Helena asked, clearly worried. "Now you need to trust her. And you need to fight, ok?"
"Don't go in without checking Hannah's platelet counts and cross matching."
"Nicole, you need to fight. Ok?" She repeated.
"All set." Herman announced, avoiding the question. As the short girl turned back around, she let out. "Don't let Hannah's platelet count drop bellow-"
"100. Yes, I know." She nodded, trying to hold in her tears.
"Will you tie me?" Nicole asked, Helena nodding as she turned around.
As she tried her gown, the girl's bottom lip trembled, her eyes filling with tears. However, before finishing the knot, she pulled herself back together.
Herman turned back around, ready to get in her bed. However, Helena interrupted her. "Wait."
Suddenly, she did something deeply unusual for their friendship so far. The short girl approached the much taller woman, wrapping her arms around her body.
"Campos..."
"No. It's ok. Don't say anything. I'm done." Helena nodded, starting to back off.
However, just then, Herman's arms wrapped around the small girl's body. "I will fight, Helena. I will."
——
Already in the OR, Helena stood by the woman, as she told her. "Arizona is in surgery, but she'll be there when you wake up. And so will I, ok?"
As the anesthesiologist tried to place the mask over her nose, Nicole shoed it away.
"Hey, hey. You're gonna be ok. Amelia's got this. You've got this. You're gonna be ok." She reassured, with a soft smile.
At that, Herman's hand shot up to her arm, grabbing it tight. "Wait, Campos."
"No. Nicole, don't. You're gonna be ok. Don't you dare." Helena warned, feeling her own voice break.
"Time to go." Nicole announced, as the doctor placed the mask over her face.
——
Word count: 6409
AN:
This was quite a longer chapter than usual, hope you enjoyed <3