In the days following Hye-won's night in Manhattan, she often thought about her late-night conversation with Julie. At random moments of her day, snippets of Julie's lonely thoughts would run through her mind. The story of the protracted break-up that she had endured - and was now trying to put behind her - had been heart-wrenching. Hye-won might be cooking lunch for the children or checking emails after they were in bed, when sad phrases - withdrawing...criticise me for being me...when we were each other's world...fix us - would pop into her consciousness. Most commonly though, it was during her pre-dawn stretches and balances by the water's edge - when her mind roamed freely, as her body worked steadily - that the memory of the pain in Julie's eyes would stir Hye-won's soul and she would feel stabs of that pain, as though it were her own. Even harder was knowing that her friend had suffered such trauma, while she herself had been so blissfully happy with Seon-jae and their little ones. In those moments of pain, Hye-won would find herself imagining being back in the ethereal beauty of the Glen of the Faeries from that night, after Julie had hugged her tightly at the door of her guest room and wished her sweet dreams. It's as if my mind transformed that painful story into a fantasy of pure joy, as an antidote to the sadness. Though it could have just been the effects of that second cocktail, of course. Her funny train of thought had her smirking to herself, even as she squeezed her glute and thigh muscles to improve her balance in the lunging warrior pose.
Transitioning to the tree pose - standing on her right foot, with her left propped along her thigh and her hands clasped together in prayer position - her mind recalled the phone conversation she had had with Julie a few days later, when she had tentatively asked if there was anything that she could do to help her: 'I know that we are going to work together in the future but maybe we could spend more time together...on the weekends...I could come into the city more often.'
Her friend had given a gentle laugh: 'Hye-won, minding your babies while Seon-jae is touring means that you don't have time to travel to the city, though I really think you and Seon-jae should celebrate when his tour ends - it's been very hard for you all.' You have that right. 'And your listening ear has already been an enormous kindness.'
Hye-won eased her body into the straight lines of the plank pose, remembering how she had tried to press the point, though her friend had urged her to be happy in her love and life: 'I'll be honest, it makes me happy to think of your happiness and it gives me belief that the magic spark is real and it's out there - for me - for anyone who is open to it. And after reading that comment on the website about how Teddy's niece, Eleanor Roosevelt, would have loved what we did, I have decided to follow her well-known advice - do 1 thing every day that scares you - and some of that is about learning to love this new life that I have made for myself.'
Hye-won eased from plank to cobra - stretching her body from the waist upwards to mimic the cobra with its hood raised - and now the memory of her incredible dream in The Glen with Seon-jae flooded through her again, filling her with whispers of the excitement she had felt. She drew on the positive energy of those happy recollections and felt it power her pose, before she moved to a cross-legged position - hands on either knee, thumbs and fore-fingers touching. She closed down her eyes to savour the freedom she felt, as the yoga teacher ended the session - feel the calm reach deep into your core and allow it to release all the love and light that you feel inside. She loved this sweet calm that flowed through her and though her mind still felt the pain that Julie had spoken of, it made her feel - even more strongly - how incredibly blessed she was to be living this sweet, fulfilled life. I never could have imagined I'd be this lucky...or this happy. And she felt the love and light surge through her and knew it was powerful and precious.
---
Over 1600 miles away in Houston, Texas - very early - Seon-jae's phone dinged on the bed-side locker of his hotel room and he muzzily reached to check the message, in case, uncharacteristically, Hye-won was getting in touch, though she was always very careful to check the time difference before texting or ringing. It wasn't Hye-won but his management company and he saw the word - cancelled - and sat up to read properly in the half-light -
Bad news - the concerts for the next 2 nights are cancelled - seemingly Jones Hall have a double-booking - but are hoping that we could re-schedule. You can be sure that I gave them a stern talking to but it does seem that you have travelled to Houston for nothing. On the plus side, you have now got some free time. Let me know if you want me to book you a flight home or even somewhere between Houston and home, if Hye-won is able to make the trip to meet you. Sorry again...
Seon-jae lay back in the semi-darkness and allowed his mind to wander - somewhere between Houston and home - and it was immediately obvious to him that this should be New Orleans - the birth-place of jazz. So many times, we have talked about how cool it would be to visit there, especially as we both love jazz so much. But his busy schedule in the summer had meant that it had been a dream that had never seemed to have a chance of becoming a reality. It is so unlikely that she would be able to drop everything, with the kids and work...but wow, if she could, what a trip that would be. He allowed himself a few minutes to indulge in a sweet reverie of how much fun they could have, if Hye-won could travel to meet him in New Orleans. On impulse - after checking the time difference - he picked up his phone and texted his love -
Hi my lovely, I know you are probably on the beach right about now so won't see this for a while but...do you think there is any way that Ciara could take the kids for today and tomorrow while you come meet me in...guess where...New Orleans? I know it's highly unlikely but the schedule has changed and I have a few free days and am in Houston - literally an hour's flight away from New Orleans. For you, it's more like 3 hours. I know, I know, it's ridiculous but I just had to ask. Kisses kisses.
He read back the text he had just sent and then quickly wrote a second one -
Don't be stressed reading this. There is no pressure. We have plenty of time to make these trips. Love you love you.
Then he lay back and closed his eyes and allowed his mind to wander along the delightful path of his love walking towards him in Freiburg airport 5 years before, her dark hair framing that delicate face and deeply soulful eyes and in minutes, he was swimming in a sea of sexy thoughts of their sweet reunion that had brought an enormous smile to his face then and did the same now.
---
Hye-won took a little time in the rising golden warmth to chat with a few of the other women who were also regulars to the pre-dawn beach yoga and it was a few minutes later than normal that she began her quiet walk back along the still-empty streets of Oyster Bay to her home. The combination of yoga and the sound-bath never failed to exhilarate her body and calm her mind. The brightening day under a high, blue sky and flooding sunshine added to her sense of well-being and she felt her breath reach deep into her lower abdomen and send vitality to every extremity.
Back in the house, she followed her usual routine of blending fresh fruit and natural yoghurt with seeds, grains and uncooked oats, not forgetting the magical powers of local Long Island honey that she was becoming more and more partial to - some producers including unexpected flavours, such as infusing the golden goodness with chilli or buckwheat, though she preferred the natural taste unadorned - to make a delicious, nourishing but light morning starter that filled her for hours. She opened the sliding door and sat on the swing seat to enjoy the fresh, cool air and early morning sounds of her garden and its posse of birds coming to life. Where is Seon-jae today? Ah, Houston - so that's an hour behind. She judged that he might just be awake early for an early morning gym session or even some lengths of the hotel pool, which he had told her he often did before breakfast and she picked up her phone to take a photo of herself relaxing in the garden before the children woke, knowing - because he told her so often - that to receive a photo of her would be the perfect start to his day. The photo didn't materialise though, as she saw the unread texts. Why is he texting so early? Maybe something is wrong. When she read the messages, her first thought was frustration that the concert bookings had gone awry. I worried that this might happen with so many venues in a few weeks so the fact that this is the first time is actually amazing. Then she smiled to herself at his cuteness - kisses kisses, love you love you - kisses kisses love you love you too - as she felt the pang of regret that such an opportunity was going to pass them by. If we'd known a few days ago, I could have asked Ciara what her schedule was like for the next 2 days. As that thought ran through her head, the words that Julie had spoken on the phone also sounded in tandem - if you and Seon-jae get chances to go to those places...grab them...don't wait or make excuses...it's the love you have that will make those trips memorable. Her hand paused over the key-pad, as she held herself in stillness. It almost felt like her brain was arguing with her heart - her rational mind trying to over-ride her feelings - and she felt her heart thump in protest. As she literally argued with herself, her paused pose drew Ciara's attention, as she walked into the kitchen, hair still curling in damp spirals upon her shoulders: 'what is it? Is Lover Boy longing and lustful?'
Hye-won huffed a laugh, while still sitting in frozen cameo and Ciara walked to take the phone from her hand and read the 2 texts in silence. She took a moment to read both again, then returned the phone to Hye-won's hand - fingers still in the gripping shape - and studied her friend's distracted expression. Her next words were totally unexpected and surprised her friend enough to turn her head and look straight at her: 'so what's the problem?'