Whistle over the waves. {BXB} [COMPLETED]

1. Sakshi

When I wake up, it takes a minute for the world to set in. Each colour, each detail arrives slowly. And when it does, it is a hospital room and a nurse is watching me. Her face is a kind one, she manages something between worry and joy on her young face and calls for the doctor.

He is a tall, grey-head, with old, tired eyes.
"Miss Das, you have sustained minor injuries during the assault, but otherwise you're recovering. The police is here, they'll need your statement. "

Assault? Statement? My head spins with questions, I want to get up, I want to ask him what he means, why am I here and what is stopping me from getting up but I can't seem to move or do anything, my body has been stripped of its autonomy and I suddenly feel too much like a dumb animal.

A policeman enters.
He gives me the needful talk, nothing feels real.
I try blinking away all of this, I want to open my eyes into a different situation.

"Do you remember what happened last night? Anything?"

I'm stretching far beyond my seams. I'm trying to think. To understand exactly what he means but last night is an illusion that I can't seem to catch. What happened?

"Miss Das, you were found by a vendor, unconscious on a road after being thrown out by a speeding car. You were raped."

And my head implodes inside itself. Rape? RAPE. rape.rape.rape. the word circles in my head like an orbitless planet.
And something tears in me. An invisible blade runs through my thigh to my stomach and I almost scream out in pain.

Rape. Rape. Rape. Rape.

"I think you need some more time. I'll be back in the evening for your statement."

Two nurses come and go. They talk about me outside... these young girls... stay-out-late-type girls you know... you should've seen the dress she was in when she got here... short? how short? enough for this to happen. why cry when you were careless yourself... some parents give too much freedom.

Parents.
MY MOTHER.

No no no no no. Even if this isn't happening in my head, it obviously is and my mother, my poor mother, can't know.
She'll die if she hears this.
She can't.
She doesn't even know I sleep around.

I call for the inspector.
He rushes in.

"Sir have you informed my mother about this?"

"We tried but we couldn't reach her."

The retreat. Of course. THANK GOD. She is at the retreat.

"So we had to call the last person you had called."

"Sir, I'm glad I was brought here safely but I won't be issuing a statement."

"Why? We will keep your identity safe." He snapped.

"No, I..." it takes all the world's strength to say, "I was not raped. I went willingly."

"Miss Das I know you're scared and in trauma but you've clearly been a victim, reporting the crime is necessary."

"There was no crime. I got drunk and just ended up there." With that my heart shatters into glass dust inside my chest.

"Miss Das please reconsider."

"I've made my decision, nothing happened last night."

He looks at me with disgust and dissatisfaction as he leaves. I agree with him. I feel filthy. I feel like a coward. A discard.

I tell myself that it's to spare my mother of the pain.
But the truth is, I can't fight this fight.

I can't. Cannot. Wont be able. No. Not now.

I'm running again. From this too.

The kind nurse enters and I ask her, "was there only one?"
She understands immediately.
In a small broken voice.
She says.
"Yes"

A small relief.

"Your friend has been waiting all night outside, he would like to meet you."

I nod. In enters a face I haven't seen in 3 years, a man I can't believe was the one who was called to aid.

Madhav.
When did I call him?
Why?