Blinded // Discontinued

prologue

Chapter One

I stood in front of the canvas with the brush in my hands. I tightened the blindfold around my eyes and put on my overhead headphones. The words that flowed through the made my chest constrict, but I kept my content.

I dipped the brush into any given color and let my hands explore the canvas. I blindly marked the board doing series of dashes and splashes. I didn’t care about washing the existing paint off of the brushes; I just dipped around and slashed the board more. The lyrics that ran through my headphones angered me, I felt as if I was fading away.

I’m sick of this life, I just want to scream! How could this happen to me!       

I ripped off the blindfold and opened my eyes to what I saw every day.

Nothing.

I open my eyes, I try to see but I’m blinded.

I threw my headphones across the room. I hated songs like that one. It reminded me of what I was. It’s not as if I didn’t know. I did. I didn’t choose to be this way, it happened.

Blind.

The questions that rang through my head daily started taking its toll. Why do I still paint if I can’t see anymore? Why do I wear a blindfold when painting, it’s not like I could see it either way. It’s just who I am and what I did.

I always had this little glimmer of hope that one day when I took the blindfold off I’d regain my sight. Believing in miracles just make me look forward to something in the future.

I still remember how I looked before I lost my vision. I was that six year old girl that had the rosiest cheeks. The one who always had two ribbons in her hair.

Then that day happened. It ruined my life completely.

It had been thirteen years since I had last seen something other than the dark hue.

Remember those games you’d play by yourself or with a sibling when you were younger? The ones where you’d shut your eyes really tight and look for them? Or the ones where you’d try to find something or someone with your eyes closed? I remember. I also remember that I used to peek because I always grew frustrated that I couldn’t find what I was looking for. You all know you’ve done it too.

Well I wish I could peak. My life is like living in an eternal game of Marco-Polo. Think about living in darkness forever. When I think about it I start feeling even more alone and cold than I originally was. I just wish that I could take my last breath and breathe away my life. I just feel like I need to be alone. 

Where do I live? I live in a flat with my friend Anna. My therapist says I should call her that, but in reality she’s just the girl who gets paid to watch over me because I’m legally handicapped. She’s either rarely here or always around. She’s two years older than me and you’d think there’s a lot to talk about, but no. There’s rarely a word spoken to one another.

Anyway, she brings home a new guy every few nights. I know it isn't the same one because I had heard the difference in their voices. She was very social.

Anna was supposed to be back. She had just taken a short run to the local market to pick up some groceries.

I heard a shuffling outside.

I pushed my body on the floor until I felt the wall behind me. I hoisted myself up with it as support and continued guiding myself with the wall so I could reach the door. I felt the door handle and turned the knob. Continuing with my wall routine, I felt the cool marble of the kitchen floor under my feet.

I stumbled on a shoe but caught myself when Anna grabbed onto me.

“I’m sorry.” I mumbled softly. Her arms felt more toned than it usually did. This wasn't her, but if it was, she had grown a lot of muscle.

I allowed my hands to roam upwards to her face. Her features also felt different. Something about her was off. I rubbed her prominant jawline with my thumb and tried to recollect this feature on her. I let my free hand trace the shapes of her lips. 

This definitely was not her. This face belonged to a man.

When the insurance place chose Anna as my legal guardian, she allowed me to pass my hands along her face. She didn't mind. I had wanted a sense of what she may have looked like.

“What’re you doing?” Anna’s voice said, sternly. It wasn’t in front of me - it came from behind. So who was in front of me? Who was this stranger that I had just touched?

I let my hands drop from the persons face and turned around slowly so I didn’t fall. “Anna? I thought - I couldn’t see who was in front of me.” Words weren’t forming and my tongue tied into knots whenever I tried to explain. Who was this person that I touched?

Her tone softened, “It’s okay.” I heard her footsteps come towards me, “That’s Harry, my boyfriend.”

Of course it was another guy. “Hi, Harry.” I said softly.

“Hello.” His deep voice said from behind me.

“I'm very sorry for touching you.” I said cautiously. I still didn’t turn around, that was embarrassing.

“It's okay, I guess.”

"Why did you not stop me?” My voice was microscopically shaking. What happened to my indomitable courage?

“Because you were looking at me. You were literally looking into my eyes.” He snorted.

“Harry she’s-“Anna started to say but was cut off by Harry.

“Anna, I don't think your roommate can handle us being a couple. I mean, who wouldn't want to date Harry S- ”

“Harry, she’s-” Again she was cut off

“Don’t try to pin this on me okay? It was all her-”

“Harry she’s blind!” Anna said quickly.

He cleared his throat, “Oh, uh.”

It would be a lie if I said I did not feel embarrassed. I did. I wanted to run away and hide. “I’ll just be getting into my room now. Good night Anna, you too Harry.” I crept slowly over to the wall as I used it as a guide back to my room. I swallowed the ball forming in my throat and opened the door slowly.

“That's the bathroom Stevie Wonder!” Anna said with a chuckle.

“Silly me,” I murmured softly. She always laughed at me when this happened. No matter how many times I made the same mistake, it always brought her to small chuckles. And that nickname she made up for me, ‘Stevie Wonder’, it was the most childish thing.

I felt a veil of venom sleek over me. Sometimes, I hated everything about her.

Just, sometimes.

Leading Role played by Emily Rudd as the blind girl. (Sophia.)

Anna casted as Caillin Russo. They're both absolutely beautiful.

edited :)