Reincarnation

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by ursula474

by ursula474

Black bodies called land their home and with sunlight on their skin
Named peace on earth
Made Mother first in a mother land
Making goddess' out of the OSHUN

And without a doubt
Were human

Black bodies
Then
Did not need to hold magic
Hold love
Hold serenity
Hold strength
Have you ever tried holding onto sea salt while underwater?

Black bodies
Were never bodies until they fell like leaves in autumn
Wearing gunshot wounds like diamonds wear rays of light
Piercing straight through
And somehow
Still nearly invisible

Black bodies
Never knew their own weight
Till they had to hold it up in chains
A cruel game of tug of war
May you tug and tug and tug

Black bodies
Never knew how to call home
With water in their lungs
Until they knew no other option
Until options became a luxury and death a solution

Black bodies
Of course knew twine
Knew thread
Knew fabric
But never did it break bones
Shut lips
Place them in the role of savage with no script
No lines
No tongue

And you see I can paint a canvas with black bodies because against white when has it ever been something more than a commodity?
Knowing north east west and south but not the words consent or permission

My admission is that I trade
My own black body
And sell myself short
Like I'm not worth the whip marks on my ancestors back
Like the blisters on their feet from walking over the cotton fields they burned to the ground
Didn't spark something in me

Black pain
Knew me in the womb
My mother's anxiety coursing through her body
And through that I was born
My flesh made into a miracle and blackness
On my chest before my name

Black pain
See you can write the words to our blues but you can't feel the rhythm
You miss the drop of blood in between the tempo
The swing of the noose in my hips

Black pain
My lips sing of black bodies falling
Told by Tupac
Told after by Kendrick
Told after by Beyoncé
Told after by Megan thee Stallion
I'm rich in this

Black pain
Make your pockets full and happy like just fed babies
Hear them gurgle
Trap music
Rhythm And Poetry
Rhythm And Blues
Yet I doubt they will ever learn the word Reparations

They will soon suckle at the teat and draw blood
See black pain has no expiration date
The same way white fragility has no face that I can't see
You can hide it under a smile or a poster

But you wear our dead faces on your chest and call it fashion
I'd call it murder but chains give my wrists ptsd
Besides
I know better than to call the police

So I will say instead
That I am tired
That the world is cold
And I am not strong just because it fits your narrative.
I feel pain
And when my black body rests in the earth

I will curse it for not holding onto the name I gave it all those years ago
And unbeknownst to me
From the ground I will spring forth as a tree
For you gorge yourself
On it's strange fruit