Sometimes

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by ursula474

by ursula474

Sometimes when I speak to you
I remember what my heart used to be like
I'm happy I gave her to you when she could hold butterflies and sparkles and hope
So easily
She had no fear of balancing on a tightrope
She would fall hands wide
Welcoming descent

Sometimes when I look at you
I see what I saw when I loved you
You are not small and petite or whatever goes for beautiful
You are a tall deep voiced and fat
Somehow this was just what I needed
Tall enough so I could hide
Fat enough to hug from me all of what I hated about myself and the world
Your voice is deep and soothing on my scars

Sometimes I remember moments
Fleeting
Of you and I
One where your hair is pink and there's a song playing that I'll love forever
Though I can't remember it's name
The sunset is on your round cheeks as they tinge rosy in summer heat
And you are softly singing and I can't even hear you
I love you in that moment
I'll always love you then

Sometimes I play with your hair
I still love the feeling of it even now
When it no longer send shivers down my spine
Did you see how much I shocked him when I touched your blue locks?
I can't tell you you're not beautiful

Sometimes we speak
You can't even see how much it means to me
When you can see I've moved on
So you do not have to hold me near to spare my heart
But you do it anyways.

Sometime when I do not see you around
When I am older
My heart even tougher than it is now
I will love you still I imagine
Still in the furthest corner of my mind
I will see you and think of the softest love I've ever known

And I thank you that it was unrequited