You woke up in the morning when the sun rays started to come up your chin, nose, eventually landing on your closed eyes. You rubbed them with no force and realized they were still puffed. Carefully coming out of the bed you made your way to the mirror and looked away with a sigh. Redness still could have been seen. You shouldn't have done this, but yet again it happened.
'Why are you up so early?' you heard a voice coming from behind you. You didn't look back nor glance in the mirror, you knew he's there. 'What's wrong with your face?' asked Taehyung coming close to you as you backed away and turned around. 'Don't tell me you were crying again' added V. His face scrunched up in concern, his brows furrowed ad lips forming a thin line. You didn't answer it at first just observing how much he changed. But you didn't want to go back to the past. Not now.
'What are you doing here?' you simply asked trying to keep your face blank. No emotions were allowed.
'I'm always here. For you.' Said the boy while lifting his hand in your direction. Avoiding his eyes you reached his palm and entwined your fingers. His hand was colder than ice giving you goose bombs on your whole body. But who cares? The important thing is that you're being with him.
'We have to go to the practice now.' You spoke while a small smile bloomed on your mouth. The only things making it look fake were your eyes. They betrayed you like the most important person in your life. 'Would you like to talk with the members?' you asked letting go of him and starting to prepare.
'I'm not going' said Taehyung stubbornly as his lips escaped a heavy sigh. 'It's hard, you know, I don't think I'll be able to do this.' He added, his voice getting quieter second by second.
'You have to do this someday anyways' you said turning around but he was already gone. You chuckled lightly. Being mad again, huh? This time it's not even a reason. Compared to what happened before. Your thoughts found their way to this topic again and you felt your eyes getting teary.
No more crying.
______________________________
You opened the door of Bangtan Boys' practice room seeing them sweating like hell with those tired faces. But something was missing.
'Hi guys' you said when they finished another song. 'I brought you some food' you laid the plastic bags on the floor in front of the boys, who were eying you suspiciously.
'How do you feel?' asked Jin directly making you flinch. You closed your eyes for a moment and just then faked a smile.
'I'm alright' you answered taking food out of the bags. Your mind was working hard to find a topic to talk about. Any topic. Even a stupid one would be good. 'How are your promotions going around?' the boys exchanged some specific glances and looked back at you.
'We're not promoting right now. You know we can't.' said Namjoon taking a few steps in your direction.
'Oh...' you whispered and stopped in your tracks. They're right. It's not a good time to promote.
'______-ah. I think we need to talk...' said Suga breaking the silence and you looked at the faces of the members. You hated it. You hated how all you've seen was pity. How pathetic.
'We don't have anything to talk about' you blurted out defensively, robotically taking your bag in hand.
'Look. We know how hard it is...' started Jimin, but your heart couldn't take this anymore.
'I have to go.' With those words you ran out of the room with tears building up in your eyes again. They didn't understand anything. They didn't know anything. But they still had the guts to make up some excused to make you sick. Crazy.
