Chapter 25

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Alec:

It was the day after the Circle attack, and the Institute was abuzz with rumours and speculation. The infirmary wasn't full, but it had a quite a few Shadowhunters in it. A few Clave agents had died, not many, but enough to cause complaints amongst some of agents. So, Alec wasn't surprised when Agent Lightwood called for a meeting.

"Alright, agents, last night was a success. We were able to defeat the Circle and Seelie agents and cause them to retreat. Now, that does raise some questions. As you all know, The Clave are allies with the Seelies. But, if the Seelies have took sides with the Circle, we will have to withdraw our alliance. I will be sending delegates to the Seelie Queen for an official statement. Actually, I might go myself."

Alec heard the whispers of the agents. "...Seelies are cleary allying themselves with the Clave..."  "...cause for war..."  "no need for statements..."

"Now, I regret to inform you that we did not come out of last night's battle unscathed. Some of our agents did, unfortunately, lose their lives, albeit a small number. And I know some of you have expressed your concerns about this, and to this I say cowardice is the most terrible of vices. You knew coming into this the risks and sacrifices you would have to make, so I would not like to hear any complaints about doing what you signed up to do. Now, I don't have anything else, so that will be all."

The agents quickly dispersed, probably so they can complain some more. Shadowhunters could be quite the headache. Alec was glad it would be a while before he had to become Head Agent, and deal with it.

Alec went to the training room, and found Simon there. Alec remembered his conversation with Clary from yesterday, and walked to to him. "Hey," he said.

"Hey, Alec. What's up?"

"You never did show up to the Institute yesterday, did you?"

"No, I didn't. But, I heard about how you guys swooped in to save the day yesterday, huh? To be honest, I wasn't sure if you would, but it made me realize. There's so many bad people out there, we should all be working together instead of fighting. I don't think the Seelie Queen shares that sentiment, though. She just seems to be all about war. She thinks it's necessary. That's why she allianced herself with the Circle. I wasn't here for the meeting, but I will say, you guys should probably break your alliance with the Seelies. Because, let me tell you-"

"Simon?" Alec interrupted him. He was hardly listening to what he'd been saying.

"Yes?"

"I need to train."

"Oh yeah, of course, I'll leave you to it. I should probably find Clary, anyway. I'll see you later." Simon left the training room.

Alec began training then, and realized he probably should've asked Simon if he was okay. If he wasn't here, he was probably at the vampire agency. But, he seemed okay, so he wasn't gonna worry about it. If Simon had been all banged up and limping, Alec wouldn't have worried himself about it.

After training, Alec decided to go to Magnus'. He'd been thinking about it all day, and he couldn't wait to go and see him. He rushed out of the Institute, and walked quickly to Magnus' house. He knocked on the door, and when Magnus opened it, he greeted him with a smile. Magnus wasn't smiling; instead he was frowning.

"What's wrong?" Alec asked.

"You should come in." Magnus said.

Alec did so, and sat on the couch. Magnus doesn't sit with him, and opted to sit on the chair bedside it. He picked up a glass on the table beside him, with what looked like whiskey in it, and drank some of it. Now that Alec looked at Magnus more closely, he noticed how tired Magnus looked, like he'd been up all night. His hair was disheveled, his eyes sagged; it was a sharp contrast from how put together he normally looked. It made Alec worry even more.

"Magnus, what's wrong? Whatever it is, I'm here for you."

"Sure, behind closed doors you are."

"What do you mean?"

"Alec, do you realize just how worried I was about you? When I heard the Institute was joining in on the attack, I feared the worst-"

"So did I. But what does that have to do with anything?"

"Alec, when I saw you last night, I wanted to kiss you. And I almost did, but then I saw the way you looked around the room to see if anyone was watching us. We've only been out of this apartment together once. At a Downworlder bar, where you wouldn't even hold my hand, because you were afraid someone would see."

"Magnus, I thought you understood -"

"Understood what, Alec? That we can never really be together because you're too scared of what other people think?"

"I would risk everything to be with you! My family, my name, my whole life!"

"But shouldn't love be worth the risk?"

Neither one of them said anything for a moment.

"Alec, I'm sorry, but I can't keep doing this. I don't want to hide our relationship, I want everyone to know that you're my boyfriend. But, I understand that you're not ready for that. So, I'm going to have to break up with you."

"Magnus-"

"Can you tell me that you would go out on the street, in front of your fellow Clave agents, and kiss me?"

Silence answered Magnus.

"Then there's nothing for you to say."

Magnus looked at Alec with tears in his eyes. "Goodbye, Alexander." He said.

"Goodbye, Magnus." Alec choked out. He got up, walked to Magnus' door, and left without looking back.

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