No more excuses

Thirty-three

A.n. Sorry about the late update.

Enjoy!

—————

Namjoon

"I'm telling you I need to see mister Kim" he growls at the nurse, sitting behind the counter. Woman wearing the light blue scrubs only sighs, and looks up the furious male in front of him.

"And I already told you, I need little more than the last name, we have here dozen of mister Kim's, as you might know, mister Kim, that last name is fairly popular." Woman says tiredly, making the furious male only huff angrily.

"Namjoon?" He hears quite familiar voice, and turns around, only to be met with surprised Taehyung. Older male storms over to the small mans, and takes his hands in his. "Taehyung, you have to help me, I need to find Jin, but.." he shoots pointed glare towards the tired woman behind the counter.

"Nurses won't tell me anything." He finishes his sentence,m. Taehyung pulls his hands out of his hold. "That's what I asked them to do." He says, his voice little quivering, but he tries to look confident.

"Why?" Namjoon asks, and is offered a small, Assad smile. "Because he doesn't want to see you"

Taehyung's words hurts, but he can't say he's surprised by them. Jin had, after all, made a decision on his own, and he could only hope that the other would eventually come back to him.

Namjoon lowers his head, not wanting the younger see the tears pooling in his eyes. "Can you deliver a message to him?" Taehyung hums, meeting the olders teary eyes.

"Could you tell him that I called it off? I made my decision, and I choose him"

———————

Months later

It was finally a day when Jin was declared fully healed and he could leave the hospital permanently. He was nervous, but he had made a plan.

Police had taken his statement but the three males and the persons behind his attack hasn't been found, and even they knew who was behind in all of this, they did not have enough evidence to back them up.

So that's the reason Jin was leaving. He would leave Taehyung and Jimin in charge in the coffee, they had been running it successfully for whole this time already.

He doesn't know anything about Namjoon, and he didn't want to. Younger had not contacted, nor tried to come see him. First he had thought that maybe he didn't know, until Jungkook had told him that Namjoon had known from the day one.

So he assumed that the other had gone with the plan he had made a long time ago and was already married to Bogum.

More reasons to him to leave.

Namjoon, on the other hand was devastated. Jungkook was not telling him anything about the other. He had cut his relations with his mother once and for all, and kicked Bogum out of his apartment, gone as far as changing the locks.

He knew from Jimin that the man he missed desperately was healed and released from the hospital, but that was all he knew.

And even that piece of information had come from Yoongi.

So, he did what he always did. He drowned himself in his work, writing and composing more music than he had done in years.

But one song was one he had been struggling with, and one he was poured moist of his pain in.
It would be first one to be released, and he could only hope that Jin was listening.

When they were driving to the airport, in silence, Taehyung could not help but feel guilty. He saw his brother suffering and everything he had heard from others, he knew Namjoon was suffering too.

But he had felt that it was right thing to do. To not tell the older that Namjoon had come, and had sent him a message. That Namjoon had done the right thing and made a choice.

Now, he was not so sure anymore. He had reconciled with his soulmate, and having Jungkook by his side was best feeling in the world, but here he was, keeping his dear brother away from his own.

He doesn't know what to say to break the silence between them, so he only turns radio on little louder.

Song in the radio is melancholic, and he can see how Jin's posture stiffens when the words start to pour inside the car.

So Taehyung starts to listen.

"Yes I hate you, you left me
But I never stopped thinking about you, not even a day
Honestly I miss you, but I'll erase you
'Cause it hurts less than to blame you"

He recognizes the voice, and that makes him turn towards his stiff brother. He reaches out to turn the radio off, but Jin stops him. "Don't."

"I try to exhale you in pain
Like smoke, like white smoke
I say that I'll erase you
But I can't really let you go yet

Snowflakes fall down
And get farther away little by little
I miss you (I miss you)
I miss you (I miss you)
How long do I have to wait
And how many sleepless nights do I have to spend
To see you (to see you)
To meet you (to meet you)"

"Hyung" Taehyung whispers, but Jin only shakes his head. "I can't, not yet anyway." Taehyung nods, and keeps driving.

I should have told him.