Raavana's Mandodari

Closure.

"As my sufferings mounted I soon realized that there were two ways in which I could respond to my situation - either to react with bitterness or seek to transform the suffering into a creative force. I decided to follow the latter course."

― Martin Luther King Jr.

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~ Mandodari ~

Do you know how it feels when you finally receive a closure for the injustice done to an innocent soul you love so much. So much more when the person is no longer alive. Every waking moment after the death you have been desperate to know why it happened. Who achieved what because of this. What you could have changed if only you were able to go back time.

Every minute questions, uncertainties and insecurities keep thawing your insides. Make you restless. And then you realize that things are not what they seemed. People die for no mistake of theirs. And when you at the very end, receive a closure, the feeling is indescribable. Though it does not bring back what you want, the person is dead, but it will make you accept the death in a better way. Accept that the person is no more and there is absolutely nothing we could do. But we can always honour their death by making sure they get justice.

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There is something serene in gazing at the sky in the wee hours of the morning as the sun is just about to rise driving away the darkness of the earlier day and bringing a new ray of light into the world.

A new day. A new beginning.

I don't know about darkness, but the new day did bring in a sort of peace to me. Yesterday had been tedious. With capturing Dhruv, rescuing Reena and admitting her in the hospital. Reena's dad was called back from his trip and he is on the way to Hyderabad from Tokyo. He will be here in a few hours.

A thought nagging me from yesterday, since the moment Raavana told me about his suspicion about Reena being kidnapped, came to the forefront of my mind. What would have happened if Raavana and I did not suspect about Reena's absence. What would have happened if Raavana had been a little late in coming to the conclusion that Reena may have been kidnapped. There are so many what-ifs. So many that it leaves me in a state of fear and caution.

But again, I have to accept that there is no use in mulling over what ifs, when you can start acting and do better. We can't change the past, but we can always improve our future. With that thought in mind, I headed inside to get ready for the day. I have taken a day off even today, so that I can be there when Dhruv is questioned. I want to know why he did what he did. And if it was true that he was behind Rajeshwari's murder.

I am very sure my HOD is going to roast me for this when I get back for this unannounced leave application. But hey, what's life with being predictable. Well, at least that's what I keep telling myself so that I don't end up feeling more guilty for feeling guilty that I skipped my duty. Makes sense?