Frozen Grapes | KSJ ✔

.thirty-eight.

Seokjin watches my slow movements with fire in his eyes and he looks back up at me, asking if this was okay. 

I breathe in. "I know that we tried going further in past," I whisper, taking off my glasses, "and that was when I was too insecure to show myself to you." I let out a breathy laugh. "And I still am." My fingers move to the top of my flannel and I pop open the first button. "But I want to show you that we can learn to be ourselves together." 

Seokjin's eyebrows press together. "We don't have to if you're uncomfortable." 

I smile at him fondly and caress his cheek. "Sure, I'm terrified," I admit, "but staying in my comfort zone won't get me anywhere." 

His eyebrows raise. "Are you sure?" 

I lean forward and press my lips against his. "Yes." 

And it's like a flip has been switched. 

In one swift motion, Seokjin picks me up from the couch. A gasp of surprise escapes me, but the sound is soon replaced with laughter as he carries me to my room, which is then replaced with sighs as he places me on the bed and kisses me feverishly. I feel his fingers move down the rest of the buttons on my flannel until he grows frustrated and tugs. There's a rip and buttons go flying. 

"You're buying me a new one," I demand, glaring at him. 

Seokjin hovers above me and grins. "I'll buy you ten more," he promises. 

My response is tugging on his shirt and pulling his lips towards mine. I feel his hands start to roam along my sides and across my stomach and I swallow down the insecurities and fears that are starting to overwhelm me. 

"You're beautiful," Seokjin says, moving his lips down the dip between my breasts and then to my stomach. "You're beautiful, Love. You're so so beautiful." 

With the way his lips were worshiping me, I almost believed him. My fingers in his hair tug, needing something to ground me as Seokjin takes me places past the materialistic realm. I feel like I'm floating on air and in nothing at all. My mind is aware of everything and is completely blank of thoughts. Lips travel up once again and suck harshly on my neck, no doubt adding to the violin hickeys that were already present. 

"Beautiful," Seokjin whispers in my neck. "Beautiful beautiful beautiful." 

My hands slide from his neck, down his shirt, and then underneath the fabric. Movements are hesitant and uncertain and Seokjin smiles into my skin, encouraging me by bringing his lips back up to mine. My hands grow more certain as I explore until I grow frustrated with the fabric in the way and lift up. Seokjin helps me and throws his shirt somewhere onto the ground. 

As my hands continue to glide over his skin, they stop at the waistline of his jeans. Seokjin freezes as well and his eyes stare into mine. We look at each other for what seems like an eternity, although it couldn't have been more than a few seconds. 

Finally, Seokjin's lips lift into a smile and he kisses my lips softly. "I guess this is where I confess." 

I frown. "What?" 

He sits up on the bed, pulling me into a seated position with him. "Love, I want to make this clear: we are not stopping because of you. We are not stopping because you aren't pretty enough, adequate enough, good enough. This is not because of you. Do I make myself clear?" 

I look to the left. How did he know that those exact insecurities flew through my mind? My eyes look back to Seokjin and I nod. 

He lets out a laugh and runs a hand through his hair. "I respect you, Hana. To me, the highest form of affection is not love, but unconditional, utter respect. I respect you, my future wife, and your future husband."