Moonlight's Embrace (A Skyrim Fanfic) (ORIGINAL)

Russet

I uploaded so many times the other day because of Thanksgiving. I'd like to give @Redleopard1104 a big shout-out for leaving such a lovely comment! You are definitely something to be thankful for! 10/10 stars? Wow! I give your comment 10/10 Brynjolfs!

Oh, and by the way, extreme werewolf scene. Very graphic, very violent. Was very fun to write. ;)

Word count: Who the hell cares

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((31st of Evening Star, one hour after the incident, 4E 202))

I left the Flagon in a storm, shoving through everyone in my way. I was trapped between dozens of emotions, and I could hardly discern what I really felt. Farkas, Vilkas, Skjor, Aela, Sansa-- they'd all meant so much. Despite the years I'd spent with them, none had earned my affection as swiftly or deeply as Brynjolf had. How and why had I called him friend? Damn it all.

"Everything I've done for you was just tossed away," I said to myself. "I gave you no reason to distrust me." I tipped my head back and screamed, one loud howl, and the guards looked at me with concern. I started to run, stumbling with every step. 

Throwing aside the doors to the city, I paid no attention to where my legs took me. Soon enough, my rage overcame me, and in seconds, claws tore their way through my fingers. A tail slid out through the base of my spine, and my bones shifted painfully as my very skeleton shifted. Truly, I had once again taken on the form of a fearsome beast. 

Storming through the forest, I tore apart trees and destroyed wildlife. I devoured the hearts of rabbits and bears alike, ripping the corpses of deer until they were hardly recognizable as animals. The lowering sun only gave me further desire to go on with my rampage. Snarls ripped from my throat, and I realized that the animals weren't enough to sate my furious bloodlust.

Through my fogged brain, I surveyed my surroundings and lifted my nose up into the air. The predator inside me had taken over. Not too far away, I scented sweat and ale, barely caught laughs on the wind. 

Without a moment of hesitation, I charged in the direction of the scents. I needed to feel the crush of bone beneath my teeth, taste the fear in the air and feed on flesh. I hadn't truly given in as a wolf for too long. Now, I was free.

Free to break the posts of the camp and charge through. 

The raised voices of terror and alarm gave me pleasure, and I released a howl to the heavens. I bolted towards a fur-clad man with an iron sword and knocked him to the ground. I didn't waste any time in gouging out his flesh with my razor-sharp claws, throwing the crimson carcass aside when there was nothing left to tear. 

To my left, a female in hard armor charged with a war-cry. I stretched my lupine mouth in a gruesome version of a smile and leaped towards her. Instantly, I fixed my jaws around her exposed neck. The bones inside gave a satisfying snap, and her breath cut off with the sound. 

We had only just hit the ground when a sharp pain sliced through my side. With fury filling my body, I turned to my attacker and flicked my dark red tail. Lifting my lips in a snarl, I jumped once more and grasped the bandit's arm in my teeth. Digging deeper and deeper into his bicep, his screams gave me strength. With a final pull, the entire appendage was torn off. Blood poured profusely from his wound while shrieking erupted from his mouth.

Unwilling to listen to his high-pitched crying any longer, I sank my fangs into his chest and crunched through his ribs. A mix of flesh, blood, bone and skin filled my mouth, and I swallowed with relish before finally feasting upon his heart. 

I rose once again, ready to prey upon the rest of the camp. With my anger aflame, the day ending, the hunt had only just begun.

...

I didn't know exactly how long I ran as a werewolf. The best I could tell was around four hours as I charged around Skyrim. Slowly, the predator within my heart felt sated in its bloodlust, allowing me to resume my form as a human.

I shook and collapsed near the edge of a lake. With heavy pants, I reached aside to my shoulder where the single bandit had gotten a strike in. It would heal soon enough, but even so, I didn't want to take any chances. I bandaged it up and stood. 

I'd ended the rampage near Lake Honrich, and the lapping of the calm waves for some reason only reignited my anger. I couldn't find it within myself to give in to the wolf again, but I could still feel plenty as a Nord.

With rough steps, I traveled around the lake and gritted my teeth. It began as soft mutterings about that bastard who'd played my friend. However, with each word, I grew louder and louder. The ground began to rumble with the force of my Voice. Sorry, lass. Sorry, lass. Sorry lass. I didn't regret a single thing I'd done in revenge, and at the same time couldn't help but miss who I thought he'd been.

I hated myself for it.

"Sorry, lass!!" I screamed, and the force of my rough voice blew the water half a mile into the sky. My mouth grew warm, tasting of copper. My throat had begun to bleed from the pressure. I ignored the raw pain and continued, desperate to find what I needed to reconcile myself. "Sorry lass, I couldn't pay attention to you because I had important things to do! I didn't listen to you because I can't trust you! Nobody cares for you, everyone who ever has was a fool! They were wrong!"

A cold bit rubbed against my hand when I wrapped my hands around my neck, having unconsciously imitated a strangling motion. With slow movements, I pulled off the necklace Brynjolf had slipped over my neck so many moons ago. I rubbed my thumb over its surface, staring at the familiar charm.

The form of a little silver dragon rested in my hand, its eyes of emerald watching me. A craze seized me, and I moved almost involuntarily. My fingers clasped around the amulet, the metal digging into my soft palms. "Fine! Fine! You ass, I can't believe I trusted you!" With all of my strength, I hurled the charm out into the lake. My voice had become a whisper when I next spoke to the empty air. "I can't believe I thought you cared for me." The sky rumbled, and rain poured down from the sky with a stinging speed.

In a daze, I bumbled towards Goldenglow, nearly invisible through the pouring rain. There was nothing there anymore, no bodies or blood left behind. I didn't care who had cleaned it up, all I cared about was to feel nothing for the next few hours. Or days. 

Without care, I forced my way into the house. Soaking wet, I wandered the house while finally processing everything-- without a vicious attack on the plains.

I'd trusted Brynjolf with everything I was, everything that was possible to feel. My thoughts whirled around, constantly biting and clawing like tiny wolves in my brain. What's the best armor and weapon worth when the real enemy is inside?

Were my actions reckless and childish or justified? Although he'd been misled, I'd thought he might have given me a chance. He'd physically assaulted me without a thought, and in my eyes that didn't deserve forgiveness.

The Thieves Guild still deserved my full loyalty, didn't it? I knew I had a duty to the Guild and bringing it out of despair caused by a wretched, lying tongue. I had to fix the damage from the same tongue that had spread honeyed lies, claiming I held fault in everything. Even Brynjolf, the only one who'd believed in me all along, had believed those falsities.

I knew that it wouldn't feel like this if I didn't care for the bastard. Deep, deep inside, I searched the fury, finding fear and depression as well. 

Could I hate him? Yes, yes I could. I did. But the betrayal of a friend had proven to be a deep thorn in my heart, one I'd never wanted to bear. It was bringing me to tears, something I'd promised myself to never shed again. You let me go so quickly, Brynjolf. What did I do to deserve this? Without provocation, you caused me harm. I laid down, hardly able to see through the blur that finally managed to spill over my eyes.

Why did you turn your back on me when I needed your trust most?